


Wrap You in My Arms

by Emmamama88



Category: Twilight (Movies), Twilight Series - All Media Types, Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-20
Updated: 2013-01-20
Packaged: 2017-11-08 04:41:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 80
Words: 75,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/439265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emmamama88/pseuds/Emmamama88
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Edward Cullen, former Confederate soldier, begins a journey from his home in Tennessee, to that of his only living relative in Texas. Along the way, he meets a girl. He's running from the past. She's running from a future she doesn't want. drabble-ish</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer- Stephenie still owns the usual suspects.  
> I own my original characters and original story.
> 
> Unbeta-ed and Drabble-ish. Need to get this out of my system.  
> No heavy angst.
> 
> Thank you to Cared for the beautiful banner.
> 
> Song rec- 'My Father's Gun' – Elton John.

 

_-From this day on I own my father's gun-  
-We dug his shallow grave beneath the sun-  
-I laid his broken body down below the southern land-  
-It wouldn't do to bury him where any Yankee stands-_

_**April 1867** _

_**Edward POV** _

The wind still had the bite a winter in it, even though March was over and done, and we was now fixin' to enter the second week of April.

I stood by my parents' grave, hat in hand, lettin' the words flow that I'd been holdin' in my heart.

Once I left outta here, I knew there'd be no comin' back to this place, not durin' my lifetime anyways.

"Pa, I'm sad to the core ya ain't comin' with me like we planned. I never knowed what a selfish man I truly was 'til now, 'cause I'm missin' ya somethin' fierce." I lifted my arm and wiped at the tears with the sleeve of my jacket. "I know for certain and for sure that you're happy 'cause you're in heaven with Ma, but I ain't askin' your forgiveness for sheddin' tears like a newborn, 'cause it ain't every day that a man is forced to say goodbye to his Pa."

I touched the stone marker on my parents' grave as I thought back to the last time I seened my Pa alive and drew in a deep breath, the cold mornin' air makin' me cough a little.

Once I'd stood there longer than a workin' man had a right to, I put my hat back on my head.

"I reckon I'll be on my way now. Take care a each other 'til I see ya again."

I looked at the freshly turned earth coverin' my Pa's grave afore glancin' one last time at the grave beside his that hadn't been disturbed in over ten years. For the second time in my life, I said a silent goodbye to my Ma and my baby sister, who left this world without ever takin' a breath, and I walked away.


	2. Chapter 2

"Ya off?" Jake Black asked as he followed me out of the mercantile store he ran with his Pa.

I stowed the last of the goods I'd purchased in the back of my wagon and nodded. There was nothin' to keep me here now.

"Texas?"

I nodded again. "My brother has a place near where they're buildin' a new Fort. He reckons it'll be easy to find work."

Jake looked at me then, his expression both sad and serious, "Lemme buy ya a beer afore ya go," he said. I nodded 'cause now that it comed down to it, I was that reluctant to leave.

Jake stuck his head back in the store, sayin' somethin' to his Pa, then he slapped me on the back with a smile, as we made our way to the tavern on the corner.


	3. Chapter 3

"I'm sorry to see ya go, Ed. But there's no gettin' around it. Ya ain't been happy since ya got back from the war."

I nodded, not wantin' to give voice to how right Jake was. He was three years younger than me, so he didn't have his chance to fight, and he'd never know how lucky he was for that favor granted him by Almighty God. He was the only friend I had left in this world, next to my brother, and I couldn't help but wonder if, maybe, I owed him more of an explanation.

After takin' a swallow of my beer, I started. "Ya know every minute that I was away, all I could think about was gettin' back here to help my Pa on the farm." I shrugged. "Maybe get married..." I looked up at him, watchin' his face for any change of expression. There warn't one.

"What I'm fixin' to tell ya now Jake, only one other person knows, so ya cain't go repeatin' it once I'm done the tellin'."

Jake nodded and frowned, "Sure, Ed."

I blew out a gust of air. "Ya know Ellie Larkin?" I frowned. "Well, I guess it's Ellie Hatcher now."

"Yeah, she comes into the store every fortnight or so."

"What ya don't know is that, afore I left for the war, I was sweet on Ellie." I cleared my throat and took another swallow of beer. "We was sweet on  _each other,_ and she promised to wait for me."

"But she married old man Hatcher a few months after ya left…" his confusion showin' on his face.

I nodded, still frownin'.

"Damn." Jake huffed out a breath afore sittin' back in his chair, causin' it to squeak from the weight.

"I guess she got a better offer." I telled him. Everyone knowed that old man Hatcher was well off. He'd been a widower for a few years so…

It was the same all over. A lot of the older fellers, what didn't go away to war, ended up marryin' the single gals afore the war was over. A lot of soldiers survived the war, only to come home and have their hearts broken.

"If things had been different, then I'd a never felt the need to leave, but as it is now…"

Jake nodded. I was happy I didn't have to say no more. "I reckon it's a good thing ya didn't marry her afore ya left."

"Why's that?" I asked, not followin' his line of thinkin'.

"Ed, if she's the kind of girl that can forget about ya that easy, then you're well shed of her."

I pondered his words and then grinned at my friend. "Well, now I know it's time I get the hell outta here, 'cause ya is actually makin' sense for once in your damn life."

Jake guffawed and tapped his glass to mine. "I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that, seein' as you're leavin' and all." He took a quick look around the room afore leanin' in close. "And all this time, I thought ya was havin' the time of your life with Miss Sally. I had no idea ya was nursin' a broken heart."

He snickered, so I kicked him under the table. After a gander around the room, I seened the 'lady' in question watchin' us from behind the bar. "Well, since ya asked,  _Miss Sally_ is one of the reasons I'm anxious to get outta town." I whispered so as she wouldn't hear.

Jake kept grinnin'. I wanted to punch him.

"So have ya or haven't ya been  _with_   _her_?" He asked, pressin' for an answer.

I took a peek in Miss Sally's direction only to find her starin' at me. I swallowed hard. There was no doubt in my mind that what she wanted most was to take me upstairs, strip me nekked and have me shoutin' her name so's everyone could hear.

I knowed it for truth, 'cause she'd said it to me herself. More than once.


	4. Chapter 4

I was relieved when I seened Miss Sally walk out the room. I turned back to Jake and gave him the dirtiest look I could muster. " _Have not._ But it ain't for lack of tryin' on her part. I confess that I almost did partake once or twice, but sobered up afore I did anythin' I'd regret. I mean, Miss Sally is a sweet lady and all, but there's no tellin' how many fellers she's laid with and, I'm not gonna lie Jake, I had visions of my Ma comin' back from the grave to whoop my ass."

Jake laughed loudly again afore finishin' his beer and walkin' to the bar to fetch two more.

Once he sat down again, his questionin' continued. "And ya never diddled no other gals durin' the war?" It was a mercy that I was leavin', 'cause my fist was itchin' to connect with his face.

"Did ya miss the part where I telled ya I was sweet on someone, ya jackass?"

"Oh, yeah." He grinned. "So Eddie ain't never dipped his wick…" I knowed for sure and for certain that he was tryin' to get a rise outta me now.

"Shut yer damn mouth, or I'm gonna shut it for ya." I threatened. "Ain't no call for ya to act all smug, 'cause I know ya ain't done nothin' neither."

Everyone in town knowed that Jake only had eyes for Renie Cook since the time he was old enough to start wearin' long pants. He'd telled me afore, that as soon as he turned eighteen, he was gonna be askin' for her hand.

I'd miss the weddin', 'cause by then I'd be in Texas.

Jake laughed again, and our talk turned to more pleasant things afore I stood to say goodbye.


	5. Chapter 5

After sayin' my goodbyes to Jake and usin' the privy out back, I rounded the corner of the tavern, headed toward my wagon. I stopped dead in my tracks as soon as I seened the figure standin' there waitin' for me.

When she seened me, Miss Sally's smile grew wider than a preacher's at Sunday-go-to-meetin'.

"Hello, Eddie."

Even though I wanted nothin' more than to run away without payin' her no mind, I turned toward her outta politeness and answered. "Afternoon, Ma'am." I even removed my hat.

"You leavin' town, Eddie?" I couldn't form the words to answer 'cause I was too busy noticin' that the dress she was wearin' now warn't the same one she was a wearin' earlier when me and Jake was drinkin'. I tried real hard not to look, but I  _am_ a man and this dress…

Well, this new dress was displayin' a  _lot_ of bare bosom, and I couldn't seem to peel my eyes away…

The sound of Miss Sally's deep throated chuckle was enough to force my eyes up to her face, and lookin' at her face was enough to deflate the embarrassin' situation that had started in my trousers durin' the time my eyes was wanderin' where they shouldn't a been.

There warn't a doubt in my mind that Miss Sally had been a handsome woman back in her day. But now, she was showin' every bit of the hard life she'd led. She looked wore out, and all that powder she seemed fond of slappin' on her face only made it worse.

"I heared tell you was goin' to Texas?"

"Yes, Ma'am. I'm fixin' to leave directly."

"You put any more thought into my offer?"

"I.., Ma'am, I don't rightly…"

"Let me make it easier for you." I could tell she was tryin' to sound allurin', but all she was doin' instead was makin' me nervous as hell. "I like you, Eddie, a lot more than I've liked anyone in a good long while." She moved 'til her lips was right close to my ear then, "I'm about to offer somethin' that I ain't never offered no one before." All the time she was talkin', she was rakin' one of her painted fingernails across my cheek. I didn't dare move a muscle on account I was pretty certain those talons of hers was sharp enough to draw blood. "How about you come upstairs and I show you a good time,  _free of charge_."

When my mind conjured up the images of what she was suggestin', I had to swallow back the beer that was threatenin' to make a second appearance.

There was no way in hell that I could tell Miss Sally the truth. I was for sure and for certain gonna get gouged if'n I was to say that there warn't enough alcohol in the whole wide world could make me drunk enough to enjoy a 'go' with her in her boudoir.

Besides, there was still a chance that someday I might meet a girl I'd like enough to marry, and if Miss Sally, bein' the large and  _enthusiastic_  woman she was, broke my dick, there'd be no chance of any young'uns in my future.

I'd never heared tell of a broken dick caused from fornicatin' with a large woman, but there was a first time for everythin', and I warn't one for temptin' fate.

I cleared my throat and tried to give Miss Sally my most apologetic smile. "Ma'am, I appreciate your kind offer, but I'm fearful late gettin' on the road as it is. My brother's expectin' me to wire him from Nashville sometime tomorrow, and if'n I don't get a move on I ain't gonna make it in time."

She looked at me for a long minute, afore she gimme a sad smile and patted my cheek. "Oh well, can't blame a girl for tryin'. Maybe I'll see you again sometime, Eddie."

"That may be Ma'am." I stood and watched as she walked away, afore climbin' into the wagon and makin' my escape.


	6. Chapter 6

After settlin' the horses for the night, I sat myself down by the fire and ate a little supper. If'n I was frugal, I knowed the salted pork would last a few days beyond Nashville and then I could stop for supplies.

I shoulda been starvin', havin' eaten very little all day, but after downin' a little pork and a biscuit, I was that worned out from the journey. Once I'd bundled up in my bedroll, I found it pert near impossible to keep my eyes open.

A sound was what woke me from a dead sleep, makin' me jump to my feet and pull out my sidearm, ready to shoot me an intruder.

We'd all heared the stories of the no goods roamin' the trails. Lots of 'em was old soldiers who never made it back home after the war. Now they was out there layin' in wait for the unsuspectin'. I heared tell they'd stove a man's head in for the price of a glass a whiskey. The worst thing I coulda done was travel alone, with no one for to be on watch while I slept, but since my Pa had done gone and left this world, I didn't have no choice.

I moved into the shadows away from the fire so's the no good bastard wouldn't have a clear shot at me, and I listened. I could be mighty stealthy when I had a mind, it was somethin' I'd learned while huntin' with my Pa and brother rather than anythin' I'd picked up in the army.

The crack of a twig under someone's foot drew my attention in the direction of the wagon. "Ya better show yourself, or Imma shoot ya by sound alone, and I ain't gonna miss." It was more of a bluff than the truth, but from what I could tell, this feller was probably travellin' alone.

I musta scared him good, 'cause after I telled him that, I could hear his breathin' pick up. I started movin' slowly toward my wagon, not makin' a sound. As I peeked my head around the back of it, and got a look at the intruder, I was stopped dead in my tracks for the second time in less than twenty-four hours.

It warn't no old soldier I was starin' at. Matter of fact, it warn't a man at all, but a girl. She was aside the wagon, sorta crouched over, shiverin' and shakin'. I moved closer and she jumped and let out a yell afore lookin' up at my face. I felt a pain in my chest when I seened that her face was wet with tears.

"Is ya alone?" I asked.

She nodded.

I knowed for sure and for certain that she coulda been lyin'. But I found myself lowerin' my weapon anyways, 'cause for reasons known only to God Himself, I trusted her.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It may be time to give a little background info. Edward is a Tennessee boy, born and bred a little north of Nashville. My mother-in-law, who is also from Tennessee, likes to call herself a 'hillbilly', so I guess that's an accurate description of our hero as well.

All she'd done was stare into her coffee cup. She wouldn't look at me, and she wouldn't speak. I took a minute to peer at her over the rim of my own cup. She was little, and looked to be young. I'd wager that she hadn't yet seened her sixteenth birthday, but it was hard to know for sure, 'cause she warn't tellin'.

She had long brown hair which was messy, like she hadn't run a brush or comb through it in a while. I recalled thinkin' she had a pretty face when she'd looked up at me with tears streakin' down it. It was hard to tell now, 'cause her hair was fallin' in front of her like a curtain. Her blue dress was dirty and torn, and her shoes was caked with mud. It didn't take a genius to know that she'd been runnin' for a while.

After watchin' her cry and shiver from the cold, I had finally picked her up and carried her over to the fire, with her screamin' and kickin' all the way.

For a minute, I think she was afeared that I was gonna toss her into it. The fire that is.

I had to sit with my arms 'round her for the longest time, 'til she stopped her squawkin' and squirmin'. When she finally calmed down, I moved away, so she wouldn't think me ungentlemanly, but made sure to wrap a blanket 'round her shoulders 'cause the night air was fair freezin'.

I stood slowly, so as not to startle her, afore settin' a biscuit and some pork close by where she was sittin'. She grabbed both without so much as a thank you, and shoved 'em into her mouth.

"Slow down missy, so's ya don't choke."

She peered up at me then and slowed her chewin'.

For the first time, I was able to see her face lit up as it was by the fire, and I couldn't look away. She warn't merely pretty; she was just 'bout the handsomest gal I'd ever seened. Prettier than Ellie, prettier than even the recollections I had of my Ma.

Her big brown eyes kept watchin' me then, and I swear that the sadness showin' in 'em was downright painful to witness.

As soon as her eyes dropped from my face, I seened her mouth fall open in shock. I cursed under my breath, knowin' that she must of got a look at my hand.

I tucked the mangled reminder of a time I'd surely like to forget inside my coat, so's she wouldn't have to look at it.

When I turned back, her cheeks was tinged pink, but I was fair certain that it warn't from the heat of the fire.

I cleared my throat, hopin' to get her attention. She looked up at me again. "Can ya speak?"

She took in a ragged breath and nodded.

"Ya gonna tell me your name?"

She just kept starin' at me, not sayin' a word.

"And where ya come from so's I can take ya home?"

I watched as her face turned paler than pale at my words, and her lips started to quiver.

"Ya cain't. I cain't…" she said, her voice hoarse from cryin'.

I frowned. "Ya cain't what?"

"I cain't go home…" she started to worry the edge of the blanket with her fingers. "I cain't go back there."

"Why not? I'm sure your folks is powerful worried about ya. Sure, they'll probably be sore 'cause ya runned off, but they's still your folks."

She dropped her face into her hands and started in to cryin' again. We warn't gettin' nowhere like this.

I moved closer so as to pull her hands away from her face, makin' sure to only use my good hand. "Hey, ya gotta stop all this cryin'. When my Pa and I would set to fightin', sometimes I would take off and not come back for more than a day. He always forgave me though, 'cause I was his boy and he loved me."

It was then that she started shakin' her head back and forth afore speakin' out in a strong voice, "My folks is dead, and if'n I was to go back there, I might as well be dead too."


	8. Chapter 8

She was back to starin' at the fire, but at least she was talkin'.

"My Mam died just after my Pap comed back from the war." She was whisperin' low like the words hurt to say 'em. "She'd been sickly for a time afore he comed home, but she kept fightin' against takin' to her bed 'cause she had me and my brothers to tend to." She said just afore wipin' at her face with the edge of the blanket. "After he comed home, she just lay down on the bed and never got up again."

"Pap was never hisself after that, and worse still, me and my brothers was afeared he'd taken leave of his right mind." She looked up at me with wide eyes, "He was never mean or nothin' like that, he loved us children more than anythin' exceptin' maybe our Mam."

"He just took to forgettin' things, like when to come in out the rain or snow and such. He got a fearful cold the winter after Mam passed and coughed hisself to death."

I couldn't help but speak up then. "Ya been alone all that time?"

She shook her head. "Our Uncle Luke comed for the funeral and never did leave after." I noticed her hands started in to tremblin' and I wanted to hold onto 'em, but didn't dare. "After that, things was fair normal. Well as normal as can be expected for three young'uns missin' their Mam and Pap. I kept house and worked in the garden, like I'd been a doin' since Mam had taken to feelin' poorly. My brothers and Uncle worked the farm. Things warn't good, but they was tolerable."

"Our Uncle liked to go to town coupla times a week. Sometimes he'd stay gone all night. My brother Henry telled me that Uncle Luke was spendin' time at the tavern, drinkin' and playin' cards, but I didn't mind so long as he tooked care of us."

"Things changed for worse again when Uncle Luke bringed home a lady he telled us he was fixin' to marry. She didn't look like no normal lady neither, with her painted face and yellow hair that was almost white." She peered up at me then like she was ponderin' somethin'. "She put me in mind of that painted up woman what runs the tavern back home. The one ya was conferrin' with afore ya set out on the trail."

My mouth falled open, I was that surprised at her words. "What are ya sayin'? Ya was in town?" I didn't get a chance to ask no more questions, 'cause she started in to talkin' again.

"I'd been runnin' all night and day through the woods by the time I got to town. When I seened your wagon, all loaded down like ya was goin' far away, I climbed in the back and hided under a blanket, but not afore I heared ya talkin' to that lady."

I was fair embarrassed that she overheared the things Miss Sally had been asayin', but more than that, I was angry as hell that she'd been hidin' out in my wagon, and I'd never been the wiser. No one got the drop on Ed Cullen, 'specially not a little slip of a girl.

I jumped up from my seat like my ass was afire. "What ya sayin' missy? Ya been hidin' in my wagon all this time, spyin' on me? Was ya makin' plans to murder me in my sleep and steal what was mine?" I grabbed her by the front of her dress, pullin' her to her feet whilst I commenced to yellin' louder. "Did ya go through my things and reckon how much ya could sell 'em for? And while ya was at it did ya get a good look at my pecker when I stopped to take a piss?" Yeah, I reckon I warn't so worried about bein' a gentleman no more.

"Start talkin', 'cause there's nothin' ya telled me so far that will stop me from hog tyin' ya and carryin' ya all the way back to Robertson County!"

The scared look on her face from afore was nothin' compared to the way she was lookin' at me now. A part of me was that sorry I'd hollered at her, but damnit it was high time I got me some answers.


	9. Chapter 9

" _Start talkin', 'cause there's nothin' ya telled me so far that will stop me from hog tyin' ya and carryin' ya all the way back to Robertson County!"_

"P..p..please don't make me go back Mister…" she whispered out the words.

I let go of her dress and gestured for her to sit, then I commenced to sittin' beside her. I lowered my voice 'til I warn't hollerin' no more, "Maybe I won't take ya back, if'n ya tell me the truth. Start with your name."

She swallowed hard and took a breath. I was for sure and for certain that her heart was 'bout poundin' out of her chest at that moment.

"My name is Izzy. It's short for Isabella." She looked up at me then. "Isabella Swan."

I narrowed my eyes at her. "Your Pa warn't named Charlie was he?"

She nodded. "The very same."

Knowin' she was Charlie Swan's girl, I found I was more forgivin' of what she'd done. That is, if she was tellin' the truth.

I thought back to the time I knowed Charlie durin' the war, and seemed to recollect him talkin' 'bout his young'uns every now and again. There was his boys, they was named Theo and Henry. Then the memory come to me as plain as day of Charlie talkin' 'bout his daughter Izzy, and how she baked the best apple pies in Robertson County. He was fair proud of that girl.

"Your Pa loved your apple pies," the words comed out afore I could stop myself.

Izzy's eyes filled with tears and she smiled.

"I knowed your Pa durin' the war, he was a good man. We was so hungry, and sometimes the fellers would talk about what was the first thing they was gonna eat, soon as the war was over. Your Pa was lookin' forward to one of your apple pies." I telled her, feelin' mighty bad about the way I'd treated her. She was wipin' her eyes with the sleeve of her dress. "Tell me why ya was runnin' Izzy." I asked in almost a whisper, knowin' I'd need to apologize soon.

Izzy coughed, no doubt to clear her throat. "I had to run away. Soon as I turned sixteen, Uncle Luke decided it was time for me to marry. He telled me that Lila, the woman who was gonna be his wife, didn't want no other women in the house, so's I had to go."

I frowned. "When did ya turn sixteen Izzy?"

"'Bout a month ago." She answered in a quiet voice. "Directly after that, he bringed one of his card playin' friends around to meet me. Soon as that feller left, my Uncle telled me that his friend had a wish to marry me. It didn't matter what I wanted…" She started in to snifflin' again then. "I s'pose I'm just like any other girl, wantin' a husband and family of my own, but I don't want nothin' to do with that feller _, James_." She placed her little hand on my arm as she spoke. "He's hard-hearted and ugly, inside and out. Not to mention  _old._ He must be at least thirty or so." She was lookin' scared again, and I was glad it warn't because of me this time. "I seened James kick his own dog, and he warn't much better to his horse." She took a shudderin' breath, "My Mam always telled me that ya could know a person's quality by the way they treated critters. If my Mam was right, then this feller is the worst of the worst."

"The night afore we was supposed to get hitched, I runned away. My brothers lied to my Uncle and telled him I'd gone to bed with a headache in the hopes that he wouldn't come alookin' 'til mornin'."

"So ya think they're lookin' for ya now?"

She nodded, her big brown eyes starin' up at me, makin' me feel the need to protect her somehow.

"I'm sorrier than you'll ever know for the way I hollered Izzy. I didn't know ya was Charlie Swan's daughter. Can ya forgive me?"

"There's nothin' to forgive. I understand why ya got angry, and I don't blame ya for nothin' ya said. All I'm askin', and I ain't too proud to beg ya neither, is that ya don't make me go back." Her voice was barely a whisper.

I couldn't stop myself from wrappin' my arms around her then. "I ain't takin' ya back Izzy, and if they find ya, I won't let them take ya back neither. I'll keep ya safe. That's a promise."

We still had a couple of hours 'til daylight, so I coaxed Izzy into lyin' down by the fire and sleepin' for a spell afore we had to get up. Knowin' that sleep wouldn't find me no more that night, I fixed another pot of coffee and pondered everythin' I'd learned.

As I sat there, the sound of Izzy's voice made me jump a little, 'cause I was fair certain that she'd fallen asleep.

"Ed?"

"Yeah?"

"Just so's ya know. I promise I ain't seened your pecker."

I tried coverin' my laugh with a cough, but Izzy's answerin' giggle made it clear that she knowed the difference.


	10. Chapter 10

Girls was a particular mystery to me. Always had been.

Considerin' I'd spent most of my life with my Pa and brother, I suppose that warn't surprisin'.

Izzy was turnin' out to be the most mysterious of 'em all. I didn't think I'd ever understand the workins of her mind, but I didn't much care, so long as I got to look at her. And lookin' at her was fast becomin' my most favorite pasttime.

If'n I thought Izzy was handsome by the light of the fire, that warn't nothin' compared to Izzy in the bright light of day.

She was a vision, plain and simple.

_A vision sent straight from the devil hisself just to tempt me into havin' thoughts I had no business a havin'._

It probably didn't help my addled brain that the last words she'd uttered afore fallin' asleep that first night had been about my dick.

_Lord, have mercy…_

After a few hours on the trail, it become clear to me what an excitable gal she was as well. I lost track of the number of times her little bottom brushed against my upper leg whilst she was turnin' to gawk at somethin' as we rode along. My dick seemed to have lost count as well, 'cause after a coupla times, he just stood hisself up at attention and stayed that way for pert near the rest of the day.

Tryin' to distract myself, I got her to start talkin' 'bout her brothers and her life afore her Ma and Pa passed. I was fair certain that I'd never seened anythin' quite so pretty as the way Izzy's face lighted up whilst talkin' 'bout her childhood.

I didn't knowed I was smilin' back at her neither, 'til she made mention of it, "Ya should smile more Ed. Ya got a right handsome face, 'specially when ya is smilin'."

Yeah, Izzy was right good at sayin' whatever was on her mind.

When we stopped for supplies outside of Nashville, she'd insisted on choosin' some of the foodstuffs herself. "We ain't gonna make it to Texas on just biscuits, jerky and salted pork, Ed." I warn't never much of a cook myself, and I knowed she was a good'un, so I gived her a little money and let her get the things she reckoned we'd need, while I sent a wire to my brother.

I was forcin' myself to be careful with the money I was carryin', but if I was honest, I'd have to admit to makin' a fair profit on the sellin' of our land and livestock back home. Even after I was to give Emmett his share, there'd still be plenty left over for makin' a new start.

Thinkin' about that, naturally bringed me back to wonderin' what to do about Izzy.

It was somethin' I was gonna need to decide real soon.

_***WYiMA***_

As I sat there enjoyin' a second helpin' of Izzy's tater fritters, I was recollectin' how nothin' that good had passed my lips since my Ma died.

"Ed, I ain't had a proper wash in days", she telled me after breakfast. I warn't sure what she was talkin' 'bout, 'cause I'd warmed up a pot of water ever' mornin', and we'd each washed our faces and necks good and proper afore settin' out on the trail.

"I'm gonna go have a wash in the creek, so's ya don't start to worryin' where I'm at. I'll be back directly." I nodded as she stood and gathered up a few things afore walkin' away.

The air was right warm, but I still couldn't reckon why she'd wanna wash in the cold creek when she could use water warmed by the fire. But, as usual, Izzy's mind was a puzzle to me.

After a good ten minutes passed and she was still gone, I got a sudden fear that maybe her Uncle and that no-count James had followed us and found her. I was in a regular panic as I started movin' quick as lightnin' in the direction of the creek.

As soon as I cleared the trees, my eyes found her. She was still awashin', and I mighta felt relieved that she warn't in no distress if I warn't 'bout as close to heart failure as I'd ever beened in my life. Even countin' the times I was gettin' shot at by Yankees.

Izzy was standin' in the water sorta turned sideways, so she warn't lookin' in my direction. She was wearin' nothin' but her shift, but she might as well a been wearin' nothin' at all for the way it was clingin' to her soakin' wet skin. If I'd a come upon her like that, not knowin' who she was, I'd a probably mistook her for one of them sirens I heared tell about who wait by the water fixin' to lure honest men to their death.

_And I knowed for sure and for certain that I'd a been that glad to follow her…_


	11. Chapter 11

"Please Izzy, I telled ya I was sorry."

"The only thing I wanna hear right now is that ya didn't just see me almost nekked, Ed" Izzy shouted the words from under my Ma's quilt in the back of the wagon, where she'd gone to hide herself from me. "Can ya tell me that for truth?"

I knowed I could say the words, but I also knowed that they'd be an out and out lie, and Izzy was wantin' the truth. I paused, considerin' lyin' anyways, just so's she'd calm the hell down.

If I'd a behaved like a decent gentleman, and gived Izzy the privacy deservin' of a lady, she'd have no call to be upset now.

_What the hell is ailin' me anyways?_

Fact is that I didn't behave like a gentleman. I stood there gawkin' at her, unable to look away 'cause I was fair mesmerized by what I was seein'. Never in all my life had I seened a near nekked woman in the flesh, but I couldn't imagine there was any in this world more beautiful than Isabella Swan.

She fair took my breath away.

While I stood there starin', I went to shift my weight from one foot to the other causin' a dried out old tree branch to crack under the movement. The sound was enough to cause Izzy's head to snap up in my direction. The possibility that she was gonna catch me peepin' startled me into action and I tried to back away in a quick hurry. My luck was for shit though, 'cause in my haste I tripped, and landed on my ass with a loud thud.

Izzy's eyes was on me then, and the look of fright quickly gave way to one of mortification when she realized exactly what I'd seened.

After hearin' Izzy's sobs from under the quilt, I made the decision that a lie would probably be for the best. "Izzy, please come out. I swear for truth that I didn't see much. I didn't even realize ya warn't wearin' your dress 'cause the sun was in my eyes and I was fair blinded by it."

She stopped sobbin' then and I heared some muffled sniffles. "Is ya lyin' to me now Ed? 'Cause I couldn't never look ya in the eye if I knowed ya seened me like that. No one exceptin' my Mam's ever seened me in just my shift."

I swallowed hard, knowin' that, as excitable as Izzy was, a lie was the only way I was for sure gonna keep my own sanity on the trail. "I promise that I'm tellin' ya the truth."

_Forgive me Lord, for more than just the lyin'…_

Another minute passed afore she finally sticked her head out from under the quilt. Her hair was plastered to her tear-stained cheeks, and I wanted in the worst way to smooth it back with my hand, but didn't dare reach for her.

Later that day, I took a sideways glance at Izzy where she was ridin' beside me in the wagon. She was wearin' some of my old clothes while hers was hangin' in the back to dry, and was pert near unrecognizable as the siren I'd seened bathin' in the creek. I reckoned that was a good thing, 'cause my pecker was 'bout wore out from standin' at attention.

Izzy hadn't spoken more than a word or two since we set out, and I was missin' her chatterin'. It was funny, 'cause there'd been times I was wishin' she'd hush up but now, not so much.

I was that grateful when I heared her soft voice say my name. "Ed?"

I cleared my throat afore answerin'. "Yeah, Izzy?"

"If'n I was to ask a question, would ya answer me for true?"

I thought about that, and so long as it warn't about seein' her nekkid, I knowed that I'd tell Izzy Swan anythin' she wanted to hear. I nodded in answer.

"What happened to your hand?"

Of all the things she coulda asked, I warn't expectin' that.


	12. Chapter 12

" _What happened to your hand?"_

'Til now, Izzy'd done most of the talkin' on the trail, and for truth, I preferred it that way. I hadn't telled her much about my life afore I met her, but today I was willin' to do anythin' to take her mind off of thinkin' 'bout me bein' a Peepin' Tom. I was that ashamed of my behavior.

For true, I was more ashamed of gettin' caught.

I cleared my throat, fixin' to tell her things that 'til that time I'd only telled my Pa.

"I was too young to join the war at the start. I wanted to, 'cause it was the thing to do at the time, but my brother telled me to stay and help Pa. Emmett's four years older than me, so he joined up right away. Anyways, everyone was sayin' that the war was gonna be over in a few months." I let out a bitter laugh at the memory.

"We heared tell that, after Gettysburg, the South was desperate for recruits, so as soon as I turned seventeen, me and my best friends joined up." I stared ahead, not takin' my eyes off the trail. "I don't reckon Hell could be any more frightenin' than some of the things I was witness to over the next year or so." I took a deep breath in an attempt to help relieve the pullin' feelin' in my chest. Izzy seened me strugglin' and looped her little arm through mine in a comfortin' gesture.

"I almost made it all the way through without gettin' so much as a scratch. My friends warn't so lucky. We lost Fred when we was fightin' down near Atlanta." I rubbed my hand across my eyes, hopin' to push away the memory of what I'd seened. "And Pete died just outside of Nashville."

"I'm sorry Ed," I heared Izzy's sweet voice comin' from beside me.

I didn't turn to look at her, "Don't be sorry. It warn't you that killed 'em."

It was quiet for a time afore I spoke again. "I got shot down in North Carolina, just a month afore the war was over. I was fair lucky it was just my hand that got it. My brother was hit in the leg and he'll be walkin' with a limp for the rest of his days." I looked down at what was left of my hand. "I was holdin' my rifle when I got hit, causin' me to lose two and a half fingers along with a fair piece of my hand, but still, I reckon I was lucky."

"The worst part was the fever that set in afterwards. My brother was frantic with worry. I don't remember much, just missin' my Ma like I ain't done since she died."

Izzy leaned her head against my arm and hugged onto it. I heared her snifflin' but didn't wanna look down at her face.

Izzy's tears was becomin' hard to endure. It was downright painful to see her upset. I felt the worst for givin' her a reason to cry twice in one day, and made a vow to do anythin' in my power to keep a smile on her face always.

She was at her most beautiful when she smiled.


	13. Chapter 13

"Can ya write?" Izzy asked after a while.

I frowned and looked at her then, "'Course I can write. I went to school…"

"No," she giggled a little. "I figured ya could read and write, I meant 'cause it's your right hand that's hurt, can ya still write with it?"

"Oh," I wiped the frown from my face and reminded myself to simmer down. There warn't no call gettin' angry with Izzy on account of she had a curious mind. "It took some time, but my writin's fair close to what it was afore. I started keepin' a journal after the war. At first it was only for practicin' but I learned that I liked writin' down my thoughts."

She nodded and smiled up at me, makin' my breath catch in my throat.

One thing was for sure and for certain, I warn't gonna write down my thoughts about Izzy any time soon. 'Cause a fair amount of 'em was improper. And if she was to ever read them thoughts she'd probably shoot me with my own gun.

"Did ya always like to write?"

I thought about that and shrugged. "Well, I never had no call to write much afore the war exceptin' school work. Durin' the war, I writed letters to my Pa."

Izzy smiled. "I writed to my Pap all the time." She was still hangin' onto my arm. It felt nice and I was fair hopin' she wouldn't let go any time soon.

"Ed," I turned and she was lookin' up at me again with a smile lightin' up her pretty face.

"Yeah, Izzy?"

"If I'd a knowed ya durin' the war, I woulda writed to ya. I woulda writed to ya all the time."

As soon as she said those words, I started in to feelin' a little woozy. My heart was suddenly palpatatin' in my chest at such a rate that I almost stopped the wagon so's I could catch my breath. Instead, I pulled at my collar 'cause I was feelin' a might warm and it liked to be stranglin' me.

After I thought about it and calmed my breathin', I reckoned out that twenty was too young to be havin' heart troubles and I was probably just a might overheated. I offered my canteen to Izzy afore takin' a swallow.

Funny thing was, every time I looked at her after that, my heart started back to thumpin' loudly in my chest.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to LaSpia who has dubbed our Eddie: Wagonward. I love it!

Time passed and afore I knowed it, Izzy and me had been on the trail together for more'n two weeks.

It hadn't all been rosy times. Matter of fact, more than once along the way I'd teased her to the point that she stopped speakin' to me. I didn't like those times particularly, but I can't say I minded so much when she got angry 'cause her cheeks would turn a fiery red, and she'd start in to breathin' hard.

She were fair beautiful, and sometimes I just set back and watched, not able to form words, while she give me a proper tongue-lashin'.

It hadn't taken me long to sort through the strange feelin's I'd been havin' when we was together, and to know for true that I had developed a great affection for Isabella Swan.

More than that, Izzy had become somethin' that was precious to me.

Rememberin' back to when I was sweet on Ellie, I recollected that the feelings I held for her was  _nothin'_ compared to what I was feelin' for Izzy. Truth be told, Ellie was a bit of a forward girl. She'd even gone so far as to kiss me on the mouth when I warn't expectin' it the night afore I left for the war. It was the memory of that kiss and Ellie's sweet words that had kept me pinin' after her nearly two years.

I hadn't even kissed Izzy yet, but I knowed for certain that if we was separated now, I'd pine after her a lot longer than two years. I'd pine after Izzy for the rest of my miserable life, 'cause that's just what I'd be without her, downright miserable.

I'd started writin' in my journal 'bout the way Izzy made me feel, but made sure to hide it away under the seat of the wagon so's she wouldn't find it. In my writin' I poured my heart out and said all the things I wanted to say to the girl herself, but was holdin' back from tellin' her. Reason bein' that I wanted to know what was in Izzy's heart afore I revealed mine.

When we stopped in Jackson, Izzy made friends with a little mutt of a dog that followed her down the street from the general store. I tried to shoo him away, but as soon as Izzy offered him a bit of bacon from our wagon, she'd made a friend for life. She made inquiries in the store as to whether he had an owner, but was told that as far as anyone knowed, he was a stray. That was the day I found out that I could refuse Izzy nothin'.

"How come ya don't already have a dog Ed?"

I took a glance at the mongrel she'd lovingly named 'Jack' after the city where we'd found him, and then up at her smilin' face. "The last dog we had was right old when I comed back from the war and it died the next year. By then, me and Pa was plannin' the move to Texas and didn't feel the need to replace her." I shrugged and looked down at Jack again.

This was gonna take some gettin' used to.

The best thing 'bout havin' a dog was that neither of us had to stand watch at night no more. A dog was a natural born sentry. I had to laugh at the way Izzy fussed over him though, washin' and brushin' out his matted hair 'til he was almost presentable. He really warn't a bad lookin' little feller after all.

Jack was mighty protective of Izzy too, and that fact alone was doin' a lot to win me over. I had to admit that gettin' a full night's sleep warn't nothin' to complain about neither.

After Jack joined us, mornin's fast became my most favorite time of the day. As soon as I opened my eyes and looked across to where Izzy was still sleepin', it made my heart fill to almost burstin' to know that she warn't just a dream, she was flesh and blood, and she was here with me.

_***WYiMA***_

We warn't in a hurry, 'cause I knowed when I set out from home, that the trip to Texas would take three months or more. With havin' a fully loaded wagon, I didn't expect to cover much more'n ten miles a day, unless we wanted to wear out our poor horses. They'd been good animals to me and Pa, and I hoped to keep 'em for many years yet.

There was another reason I warn't in a hurry though. As soon as we got to Texas, I had no idea what was in Izzy's mind. I would lay awake some nights just worryin' that, once we got there, she'd set out on her own, maybe find a feller to marry, and I'd never see her again.

In my heart, I wanted more than anythin' to be that feller she chose but, as I said, I couldn't guess what was in her mind.

I'd even gone so far as to start tellin' her all about the plans me and my brother had for when I arrived, but every time I spoke of it, she grew as silent as the tomb.

I didn't rightly know what to think. She was a mystery.


	15. Chapter 15

I was fixin' to surprise Izzy, but now that it comed down to it; I was that afeared of her reaction to what I had planned.

It had been a might troublin' to me that she'd lit outta home with only the clothes on her back. Her blue dress had seened better days, that was for certain. But Izzy never complained. Not even 'bout havin' to wear some of my duds when it was washin' day.

I taked a chance when we got to the town of Bartlett, and while Izzy was outside playin' with Jack, I asked the lady runnin' the general store if there was a dressmaker in town sold readymade clothes.

"What exactly are you lookin' for son?"

I smiled at her callin' me son, knowin' she warn't much older than me.

"Well, my  _wife_ ," I said with a gesture to where Izzy was standin' outside with Jack, "is in sore need of a new dress." I'd thought 'bout callin' Izzy my sister, but that didn't set right with me. Callin' her my wife feeled just 'bout perfect, even if it did cause my heart to start poundin' frantic in my chest again.

The lady looked real seriouslike afore answerin'. "The only dressmaker in town works off of special orders only, so I know she won't have anything…" She trailed off as she seemed to be studyin' Izzy through the window. She walked over to it, I supposed so's she could get a better look. "That right there's your wife?" She turned to face me afore posin' the question.

"Yes, Ma'am." It was gettin' easier and easier to tell that lie.

She bit her lip as she seemed to be ponderin' somethin'. "Wait here just a moment." She telled me afore disappearin' into the back room. She comed back a few minutes later holdin' a bunch of cloth in her hands. When she held it up to show me, I recognized it to be two calico dresses. One was dark red and the other a brown. They was brand new.

"I made these a few months back, intendin' to wear them this summer," she smiled afore restin' her hand on her right large belly. There warn't no doubt to anyone that seened her that she was 'with child'. "Your wife looks to be about the same size as me," she giggled lightly. "Or rather the size I used to be. I'll sell them to you for what I have in them."

"Oh but Ma'am I wouldn't feel right buyin' your own clothes from ya."

"Listen," she hesitated, "what's your name?"

"Ed, Ma'am, my name's Ed Cullen."

She smiled again, "Ed, I can make more dresses once this little one arrives. For now, those are doin' nothin' but gatherin' dust," she was whisperin' then, "I'd much rather someone have them that can wear them. So, you're doin' me a favor by takin' them off my hands."

I smiled gratefully, knowin' that she was the one grantin' the true favor, but I was that happy to be able to get Izzy them dresses. "In that case, I thank ya kindly Ma'am."

She wrapped the dresses in brown paper and I paid a sum far lower than I shoulda afore leavin' out of there.

"What ya got there Ed?" Izzy asked as we piled into the wagon. She was always curious. "Just some cloth for my brother's wife. She likes to sew."

Izzy let out a little huff and folded her arms across her chest. "I like to sew," she stated with a pout.

I chuckled afore takin' the reins in hand.


	16. Chapter 16

We set up camp near a creek just outside of town.

When I waked up early the next mornin', I left Izzy sleepin' afore goin' to have a proper wash in the creek. Part of my surprise for her was that we was stayin' put for today, so's we could have a rest.

After my wash, I put on my Sunday best and started the coffee brewin' afore unwrappin' Izzy's dresses and layin' them out in the wagon where she could see.

When she woked up she smiled at me, "Ya's all dressed up," she said as she stretched.

I nodded and handed her a mug of strong coffee. "I thought we could go to church, seein' as it's the Lord's Day."

Her smile turned brighter for a minute afore it disappeared altogether.

"What's ailin' ya Izzy?" I asked, movin' to sit beside her. I was that concerned 'bout whatever was causin' her to be so near to tears. "We don't have to go, I just thought…"

"I want to Ed. I'd like it very much. I ain't been to church in so long…"

"Then what ya frownin' for?"

Izzy give me a sad smile. "It's just," she reached over to touch the front of my jacket. "Ya look nice Ed, better'n nice, and I don't have nothin' fittin' to wear to church…" As hard as she was tryin' to hold 'em back, one tear managed to escape and slip down her cheek. As soon as I seened it, I grabbed her hand and, quick as lightenin', pulled her over to the wagon.

Her eyes grew wide as saucers when she spied the dresses. "What's all this?"

"These here are for you."

She looked away from the dresses to frown at me. "Where'd ya get 'em?" At least the tears was gone.

"I have to confess to tellin' ya a lie, Izzy." I runned a hand over my face afore continuin'. "That package I carried out the store yesterday warn't for my sister-in-law, it was these here dresses. The lady had made 'em for herself, but never got the chance to wear 'em."

Izzy nodded in understandin' then, 'cause she'd seen the lady while we was shoppin', and no doubt took notice of her belly. But there was no way I was gonna mention that out loud. "Anyways, she agreed to sell 'em to me."

Izzy turned back to the dresses and ran her fingers over the material of the brown one, and I heared her start to sniffle.

"Izzy… if they're not what you want, we can try in Memphis to see if'n they have some readymade dresses…"

She looked up at me and pressed her fingers against my lips. "Hush up right this minute, Ed Cullen. What ya did is just about the sweetest thing anybody's ever done for me. I cain't even tell ya how happy I feel right now." She was cryin', but smilin' at the same time. It was mighty confusin'.

She threw her arms around my neck then and hugged the stuffin' out of me. Izzy was a right strong little thing. I sighed in contentment as she grabbed up them dresses and twirled around while holdin' them against her. Jack was jumpin' all around and I had to laugh 'cause it looked like they was dancin' together.


	17. Chapter 17

The Church service was right quiet and peaceful. Izzy wore her new brown dress and put a white ribbon in her hair. I reckoned that the next town we visited, I'd buy her a new bonnet as well.

The last time I'd attended any sort of church services, apart from funerals, was durin' the war. The preachers there was always remindin' us that God was on our side. I was fair certain that the Yankee preachers was tellin' those fellers the same thing.

My relationship with the Lord warn't at its best, and I was fair ashamed to admit that fact to Izzy, so I didn't speak on it.

My Pa could take a portion of the blame though. I was just a boy when Ma died, and from that day, Pa blamed the Lord for takin' her, and said he warn't never gonna set his foot inside church again.

No matter how long I lived, I'd never forget my Ma's funeral. Pa had cussed up a storm afore tellin' everyone there what he thought of 'em. He never cussed me or Emmett though. His eyes only ever shined with love for the two of us, even when he was at his most despairin'.

When I comed back from the war, I was surprised to find that Pa had made his peace with God. He confessed to me and Emmett that facin' every mornin' with the fear that his boys mayn't ever come home sobered him up in a quick hurry, and he knowed that he needed more than his own counsel to survive it.

I never went to church with him when I got back, for fear of seein' Ellie and her new husband, but Pa didn't question me 'bout it. I reckon he understood.

"Mornin' Mister Cullen," the lady from the general store greeted us when we was comin' out of church.

"Mornin' Ma'am." I gave her a smile.

"I never did tell you our names yesterday." She smiled, givin' Izzy's dress the once-over afore turnin' to the man beside her. "I'm Addie Reed, and this is my husband George."

"Pleased to meet you," I said with a nod as I shook Mister Reed's hand.

Missus Reed turned to Izzy then. "Mister Cullen didn't make mention of your name when we talked yesterday."

Izzy blushed a little. "It's Izzy, um, that's short for Isabella. Isabella Swan."

Missus Reed looked a might surprised, and I knowed right away what the matter was. "Sorry, Ma'am, we ain't been married long. Izzy's always forgettin' her name's Cullen now." From the corner of my eye, I saw Izzy's mouth fall open in surprise while the grip she had on my arm tightened, to the point where it was almost painful.


	18. Chapter 18

_Missus Reed looked a might surprised, and I knowed right away what the matter was. "Sorry, Ma'am, we ain't been married long. Izzy's always forgettin' her name's Cullen now." From the corner of my eye, I saw Izzy's mouth fall open in surprise while the grip she had on my arm became almost painful._

She recovered herself right quick though.

"Beg pardon." She said in a soft voice. "It's just takin' some gettin' used to is all." Izzy's eyes was wide, as she answered.

Missus Reed gave Izzy an understandin' smile. "That's quite alright dear. I remember those days well." She looked over to the lawn beside the church, where folks was millin' around, settin' out a spread of food. "Can I convince you to stay a while and have somethin' to eat? Most Sundays, weather permittin', we like to have a picnic after services, gives everyone a chance to socialize."

I turned to look at Izzy, and she was pleadin' with her eyes for me to say yes. "Much obliged for the offer Missus Reed; me and my  _wife,_ " I gave Izzy a little wink, "would be more than pleased to partake."

Missus Reed and her husband headed over toward the rest of the congregation, but instead of lettin' me follow, Izzy held onto my arm and started pullin' in the direction of the wagon. "I wanna get Jack."

Soon as we was outta earshot of the others, she lit into me. "Ed Cullen, why ya been sayin' that we're married?"

I was afeared that she was angry, but was that surprised to see a smile on her face.

"Izzy," I couldn't find it in me to smile as I untied Jack from the wagon, and I couldn't find it in me to look her in the eye for what I was 'bout to say, "I don't care what folks think of me, but I don't want no one thinkin' badly of ya. If they knowed we was travellin' all the way to Texas and warn't married…" I kept lookin' at the ground, "No one should need to be questionin' your virtue is all."

Again, she surprised me by gigglin'. "Ed, why's ya blushin'?" I put my hand up to cover my cheek, I was that embarrassed. "And why didn't ya just tell folks I was your sister?" She moved closer to me while she was speakin' 'til we was almost nose to nose. Well not exactly nose to nose, 'cause Izzy was right much shorter than me.

I wrestled in my mind whether to tell her the truth, then gived up tryin' to hide it. "For truth Izzy, I kinda liked the thought of ya as my wife." I was back to not lookin' at her again. "But I knowed that ya ran away from home so's ya wouldn't have to marry, and I've gone and fixed it now so ya have to pretend to be married, which is almost as bad…"

"Shh." Izzy had her fingers on my lips again. I liked the feel of 'em. "Ed, I need to ask ya a question." I finally looked back up at her face, she was still smilin'. "Was ya ever kicked in the head by a mule or maybe dropped on your head as a small child?"

"What?"

She giggled again. "I'm only askin' 'cause ya sure get yourself worked up over things when ya could save yourself the trouble by just askin' me. It makes me think that maybe ya ain't quite right in the head." She was full out laughin' by then.

"Ain't nothin' wrong with my head." I scowled at her, which seemed to only make her laugh all the more. I swore that soon them happy tears was gonna make another appearance. "Whenever you're through laughin' at me, mayhap we can get some vittles."

Izzy glanced over toward the churchgoers afore facin' me again. "Just so ya know Ed," she started in a whisper, "I ain't against the idea of marryin', I just ain't marryin' James. Not ever." She laid her hand on my arm. "I reckon ya might be as different from James as day is to night though, and any gal would be proud to be your wife, even if it's just  _pretend._ " She whipped around then, grabbin' up Jack's leash and hurried over toward the picnic area.

I stood there a while, just lookin' after the way she'd gone, not knowin' rightly what to think.


	19. Chapter 19

"What ya sittin' all the way over there for?" I asked Izzy. Ever since we left the picnic, Izzy had been actin' kinda strange.

Well, for true she always acted strange… but this was a might different than usual.

She made sure to sit on the far edge of the wagon seat. I was afeared that if we hit a rough patch on the trail, she'd likely bounce right on out of the wagon.

"I'm makin' sure that I ain't sittin' too close to ya Ed."

"Why?" I turned to see if she was teasin'. She warn't smilin' so I reckoned I must of done somethin' wrong.  _Again._

"Well," She hesitated, so I glanced her way, and saw her cheeks startin' to pink. It was so fetchin' that I almost forgot to turn my attention back to the trail. "I understand why ya telled Missus Reed and them other folks that we was married, but when Mister Reed introduced us to the Pastor," her voice got shaky and dropped to a whisper then, "and ya telled him the same story… For true Ed, when the Lord reaches His hand down to smite ya for tellin' a bold faced lie to a man of the cloth, I don't wanna be sittin' too close."

I couldn't help myself. I laughed out loud, and after a minute or so she was laughin' right along with me.

"Izzy, I'm a firm believer that the Lord's a lot more understandin' than ya think. I was always taught that He could see into a person's heart and know the reasons for the things they do. He knows I warn't tryin' to be a deceitful man; I was just tryin' to protect ya, 'cause I couldn't bear to see no harm come to ya."

She was quiet and still for a bit, afore she slowly began to slide across the seat over to me. She kept slidin' 'til she was a might closer that she usually sat, and then she leaned her head against my arm.

"Ain't ya afeared of gettin' struck down?" I teased.

I could feel her head shakin' against my arm. "I was just thinkin' that if somethin' was to happen to ya, I don't rightly know what I'd do. So, if the Lord's gonna smite ya down, then He can go on ahead and smite me too. But I'm still holdin' out hope that He thinks better of it."

If anyone had seened me then with the big smile that I kept on my face for most the rest of the day, they'd a probably thought I'd gone simple in the head. But like I telled Izzy, there warn't nothin' wrong with my head. I reckon I was just a lovesick fool.

If I'd understood rightly what Izzy was tryin' to tell me afore, then maybe she had feelins for me that was near as strong as the ones I had for her. I was surely countin' on it.

_***WYiMA***_

" _Oh, yes, I am a Southern gal, and glory in the name,  
and boast it with far greater pride than glitterin' wealth and fame._

 _We envy not the Northern gal her robes of beauty rare,  
though diamonds grace her snowy neck and pearls bedeck her hair._"

I smiled at Izzy's song while loadin' up the wagon. She had a voice made for singin', and I knowed the day would be a good one when it began by gettin' to hear it. I was fast forgettin' what my life was like afore Izzy stowed away in my wagon, and I made sure to give my thanks to the Lord every night for sendin' her to me.

Some days, we sat quiet durin' the ride, other times we'd talk, and then there was those days that Izzy would read aloud from one of the books that belonged to my Pa. I'd read them all of course, but they was new to Izzy, and I couldn't help but smile at her excitement when she wondered aloud what was gonna happen next.

"' _I have known him walk with- I have known him walk with Tiny Tim upon his shoulder very fast indeed.'"_

"' _And so have I', cried Peter, 'Often'."_

"' _And so have I', exclaimed another. So had all."_

"' _But he was very light to carry', she resumed, intent upon her work, 'and his father loved him so, that it was no trouble- no trouble'."_

"Is ya listenin' Ed?" Izzy sounded as if she was 'bout to break down in tears. "That poor little feller is dead. Tiny Tim died!" She dropped the book on her lap and started in to sobbin' then as Jack nuzzled his head against her hand, tryin' to comfort her.

"Izzy," I patted her other hand. "Ya gotta read on. That part's just a vision of the future that'll happen if old Scrooge don't mend his ways."

She stopped sobbin' and looked at me. "Ya ain't lyin' to me are ya, Ed?"

"No, Izzy." I gave her hand another pat. "Just read on, sweet girl."


	20. Chapter 20

By nightfall, we was as close to Memphis as I would allow. Tomorrow, we would start headin' south. Even if Emmett hadn't of telled me to stay away from the city, I'd heard of the troubles they had a year afore, and warn't about to let Izzy anywhere near that place.

Still, even though we was a couple of miles out, I got a bad feelin' as I pulled the wagon off the trail to make camp.

"Izzy, I want ya to take Jack and lay down in the back of the wagon."

"Why?"

"Just do as I say. Once we stop, ya can come out."

"Alright Ed."

Not a minute had passed after she disappeared into the back afore two fellers hopped up on the wagon on either side of me. "Stop if ya know what's good for ya." One of them snarled just afore I heared him cock his sidearm by my right ear. At the same time, the other one started tryin' to wrestle the reins from my hands.

I didn't have so much as a chance to take a breath afore Jack comed flyin' out the back and sunk his teeth into the feller's arm on my right, forcin' him to drop the gun, and Izzy was beside me pointin' a rifle at the other varmint.

"You and your friend best move away from my husband and my dog afore I blow your head clean off your shoulders." The feller who was tryin' to get the reins, throwed his hands up in surrender and the other one tried to get away, but Jack warn't about to give up the grip he had on his arm.

I pulled my sidearm from my lap, and put the barrel against his head afore callin' off my dog. "Come on, Jack." He let go then, but kept his teeth bared at the scoundrel. "Good boy," I made sure to tell him.

"Please Mister, Ma'am, we didn't mean no harm. We's just hungry and ain't been able to find work," the feller with the dog bite started in to pleadin'.

"So's ya thought to rob me and my Missus, maybe kill us while ya was at it?"

"No sir. And we thought ya was alone," the other piped up then.

"That don't mean ya didn't plan on killin' me."

Neither of 'em would look me in the eye then.

"Let's shoot 'em and throw 'em in the river, Ed" I was right surprised to hear Izzy pert near shout the words, makin' both those fellers start shakin' in their boots.

"Please Ma'am, if'n ya let us go, we promise to get on the right path." The other feller nodded his agreement. They both looked to be in a panic.

"Izzy, I think the Lord would want us to give 'em another chance."

Izzy pursed her lips. "I don't know Ed, I'm not feellin' all that forgivin' at the moment. These fellers have been up to the devil's business, robbin' and hurtin' good people." She paused and took in a shaky breath, it warn't 'til then I realized she was cryin'. "They mighta taken ya away from me forever." She whispered.

"They didn't though Izzy, 'cause ya saved me." I watched as she swallowed hard afore noddin'.

We let those no goods go, but not afore relievin' them of the only gun they had between them. Instead of makin' camp right there, I turned the wagon around and drove back the way we comed for a spell, needin' to put a little distance between us and the spot where we met up with those robbers.

I didn't sleep well; my dreams bein' disturbed by visions of mysterious figures stealin' Izzy away while I stood there helpless to stop 'em. I kept wakin' up and lookin' over to be sure she was still there, afore sighin' in relief and closin' my eyes again.

"Ed," Izzy was whisperin' my name. I opened my eyes, to find her leanin' over me. It was still dark, nowhere near close to mornin'. "Is somethin' wrong?" I started to sit up, but Izzy laid her hand against my chest.

"No, there's no danger," she answered in a quick hurry afore bitin' at her lip.

"Then what's ailin' ya Izzy?"

She let go of her lip and it started quiverin'. "I'm scared Ed. Can I sleep next to ya?"

I was for certain that Izzy didn't know what her words was doin' to me, but she looked so forlorn that I warn't about to refuse her. I just nodded and she crawled up under the covers 'til she was lyin' against me. I took a gander at Jack where he was sittin' by the fire, his eyes alert and his ears twitchin' at every sound, and wrapped my arms around Izzy, just breathin' her in.

I heared her let out a contented sigh at the same time my body relaxed. I closed my eyes and didn't know another thing until mornin'.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *A word of explanation from last chapter. Memphis, like a lot of cities during the period of reconstruction, was not the safest of places. A year before Izzy and Ed made their trek across Tennessee, deadly riots had broken out in the city. Union soldiers were in charge, which only caused tensions to run higher.

I waked the next mornin' havin' to piss so bad my back teeth was near swimmin'. As much as I hated to leave Izzy, even if only for a minute, there was no avoidin' it.

Her warm little body had been wrapped 'round mine for most of the night, and I had a secret wish that she'd get scared every night if'n it meant she'd sleep up against me like that.

We would be spendin' the day cuttin' south across the city, so's to pick up the road that would lead us into Mississippi. I was still a might nervous 'bout what we might run into along the way, but it was better to face it durin' the daylight hours.

Once we got cleared of Memphis, I had a plan formulatin' in my mind where I was gonna be honest 'bout my feelins and kiss Izzy right on the mouth. Once I did that, there'd be no turnin' back; she'd have to agree to be my wife.

I smiled at the mere thought of it.

After relievin' myself, I was makin' my way back to camp when I 'bout jumped outta my skin at the sound of Jack barkin' and growlin'. I knowed his sounds by now and this meant only one thing: an intruder.

I hot-footed it back, and the scene that met my eyes was one I couldn't have imagined in a million years. Jack was growlin' and gnashin' his teeth while Izzy stood beside him. She had a raised rifle in her hands, aimed at none other than my good friend Jake Black.

"Go ahead, I dare ya to move a muscle Mister, I been itchin' to shoot somebody since yesterday." Izzy telled Jake in a vicious tone, her eyes wild with fury.

Jake, displayin' the common sense the good Lord gave him, had his hands raised in surrender and stood there, still as stone.

"Izzy!" I called as I comed up on her, "put down the gun. This here's my best friend, Jake."

She gave me a wary eye, and looked around, no doubt makin' sure that no one was forcin' me to say the words. I grabbed onto the barrel of the gun, pushin' down 'til it was aimed at the ground.

"Izzy," I said her name softly this time, afore wrestin' the gun from her grasp and wrappin' my arms around her tremblin' form. "It's allright Izzy. I got ya."

I turned toward my friend, while still holdin' on to Izzy. "Not that I ain't glad to see ya, but why in the world is ya here, Jake?"

Jake finally put his arms down and took a breath. "I took to the road almost five days ago to warn ya." He then looked at Izzy and removed his hat. "I take it this here's Izzy Swan?"

I nodded.

"Well Miss, ya got some folks lookin' for ya. To make matters worse, some of 'em got it in their heads that my friend Ed here spirited ya away and that his purposes was less than honorable. They wanna take ya back home, and teach Ed a lesson while they's about it."


	22. Chapter 22

"How'd they figure that Izzy was with me?"

"One of the gals that works for Miss Sally seened her climb into the wagon just afore you was leavin'," he turned, speakin' to Izzy then, "She didn't think nothin' of it 'til your Uncle and that shady character, James Forrest, come inquirin' some time later."

Jake decided to travel with us for the next day or so. As slow as we was movin' on the trail, I felt like a sittin' duck for those fellers who was searchin' for us, so I was fair grateful for his help. Jake reasoned that those fellers probably warn't gonna follow us into Mississippi, so he wanted to make sure we was well on our way afore headin' back home. I hoped he was right, and knowin' that he could make it back in just a few days over the trail that taked me and Izzy almost a month to travel, made me feel a might less guilty for his sacrifice.

"My Pa and Seth can handle the store for a few more days yet." He telled me as he helped us pack up the wagon.

We skirted along the southern edge of the city, Izzy and me in the wagon, and Jake ridin' alongside on his horse. Izzy was agreeable when I telled her to hide in the back with Jack 'til we was clear of the city.

There was no tellin' what some fellers, especially the desperate type we was seein' around Memphis, would get in their minds at the sight of a pretty girl.

The only bit of trouble we met up with was from a group of three Yankee soldiers who, I reckoned, was supposed to be guardin' the road.

"What's your business?" One of 'em, mayhap the leader, asked while the other two walked 'round, lookin' over the wagon. I was surely hopin' Izzy had a hold of Jack, 'cause if'n he was to bite one of these three, there warn't a doubt in my mind that they'd shoot him dead.

"We's just travellin' through on our way to Texas." I said in answer.

Just then I heared Izzy squeal. "Well looky what I found," one of them Yankees called out. I turned to see him grabbin' Izzy by the arm like he was tryin' to pull her from the wagon.

"Let go," she hollered as Jack liked to strangle himself while tryin' to get free from where Izzy had tied him up.

I immediately saw red and my hand went to grab my sidearm.

"Ed!" Jake called, drawin' my attention away from Izzy, just as the soldier closest to me cocked his gun. I let my hand fall away from my pistol in defeat.

A quick glance back behind me revealed Izzy, still strugglin' to get free, while them two soldiers behind the wagon laughed at her.

The next few minutes was as hard as any battle I'd lived through durin' the war, as I fought against my own desire to put holes in all three of those bastards. Knowin' for sure and for certain that actin' on it would likely get us all killed, I spoke up instead, "Get your paws off my Missus!"

I didn't even look at Jake. I was fair certain his eyes was bulgin' from their sockets upon hearin' my words.

The soldier holdin' the gun on me looked over at Izzy. "You've got a pretty little wife there, Mister."

His words only served to make me madder, and I give him a narrow stare.

He lowered his gun and grinned at me. "Let go of the man's wife, Butler." He called in a loud voice.

I turned and kept my eyes trained on Izzy. The no good let go of her, still laughin', and she scrambled away from him to the front of the wagon 'til she was right behind me, her little hands clingin' to my shoulders as she breathed heavy against my neck. "Are ya well, Izzy?" I asked, quiet like.

She nodded. "I ain't harmed Ed."

The leader spoke again, still studyin' me. "You fight in the war?"

I nodded, figurin' the truth might get me in more trouble, but not willin' to deny my country and kin.

He seemed to think about that for a minute afore noddin'. "You won't want to linger near the city come nightfall. It isn't safe, especially for your wife."

"We warn't plannin' on it."

He nodded again, "Good day to you." He telled us afore wavin' us on.

_***WYiMA***_

Once we was finally on the road headed south away from Memphis, Izzy untied Jack and he was free to sit up front with us again.

As soon as we crossed into Mississippi, I breathed a sigh of relief, and we set up camp for the night.

_And that was when everythin' turned to shit…_


	23. Chapter 23

_And that was when everythin' turned to shit…_

Jake Black was my best friend. At least I  _thought_ he was my best friend. Right now, I warn't too sure. As I watched him and Izzy laughin' and talkin' by the fire, I couldn't believe these was the same two people from this mornin', where one was holdin' a gun on the other, threatenin' to shoot.

"Ain't that right Ed?" Jake was askin' me a question, but I had no idea what he was yappin' about. I reckon that when my blood started boilin' over how familiar he was gettin' with my girl, it had affected my hearin'.

"What?" I asked him with a scowl.

"My Granny. Ya met her afore. I was just tellin' Izzy that she was half-Cherokee. She passed on just afore the war, but I learned a lot from her and her brother. My Uncle Ned was one of the best trackers in Tennessee."

Izzy was a might excited 'cause one of her Grannies happened to be part Cherokee too, and she and Jake reckoned they was some kinda long-lost cousins.

The look on Jake's face made me suspect that he wouldn't mind it if they was 'kissin' cousins'.

I kept havin' to remind myself that he had comed to warn us 'bout the fellers that was after Izzy, and that his company was fair helpful on the trail, so's I wouldn't walk over there and hit him.

Even Jack was sittin' right beside Jake, his tail waggin' while Jake rubbed his head.

Man's best friend.

It was a damned lie.

When Jake pulled out his mouth organ and started into playin' while Izzy sang, I couldn't stand it no more.

I hadn't never had a drink in front of Izzy afore, but I was feelin' the need for one now, so's I retrieved a bottle from the wagon.

_The years creep slowly by, Lorena  
The snow is on the grass again  
The sun's low down the sky, Lorena  
The frost gleams where the flowers have been  
But the heart throbs on as warmly now  
As when the summer days were nigh  
Oh, the sun can never dip so low  
A-down affection's cloudless sky._

I couldn't hold onto the anger as I listened to Izzy's fair voice. The liquor warmed me and her voice started in to makin' my heart beat faster. It helped that her eyes was on me as she sang, with nary a glance in Jake's direction.

_A hundred months have passed, Lorena  
Since last I held that hand in mine  
And felt the pulse beat fast, Lorena  
Though mine beat faster far than thine  
A hundred months...'twas flowery May  
When up the hilly slope we climbed  
To watch the dying of the day  
And hear the distant church bells chime._

"I cain't sing no more of it," Izzy's voice trailed off quietly. "Makes me think of sad times."

I stood up then and went to sit beside her, while passin' the bottle off to Jake.

And that's how we spent the balance of that evenin', drinkin' and listenin' to Jake play. The drink made me feel bold enough to wrap my arm around Izzy. She never complained nor pulled away, so I reckoned it was alright.

Sometime durin' the night, when the fire was burnin' low, she left the spot where she was sleepin, and crawled in next to me without utterin' a single word. Not carin' for a minute what Jake might think, I pulled her close and kissed her hair, hopin' I warn't dreamin'.

Whether ridin' in the wagon or sleepin' next to the fire, I wanted her beside me always. Even though it warn't proper, I just couldn't seem to help myself. 


	24. Chapter 24

It was the shakin' that woke me. When I got enough sense into myself to open my eyes, I realized that Izzy was pressed up against me and her whole body was tremblin' from head to toe. Afore I had a chance to find out what was the cause, I was startled by a loud snort comin' from the other side of the fire, where Jake was sleepin'.

Izzy started shakin' again. It was clear as crystal to me then that she was laughin'.

"Izzy?" I whispered.

At the sound of my voice, she rolled over to face me. I could see her smile shinin' in the darkness. "My brother Theo snores like that. My Mam used to threaten to make him sleep in the chicken coop." Izzy laughed for a while longer, but when the laughter finally faded away, she started in to cryin' softly while clutchin' onto my shirt.

"I miss 'em Ed." She telled me in a broken whisper.

"Your brothers?"

She nodded. "All of 'em. But most especially my Mam and Pap." She answered afore layin' her cheek against my chest.

I ran my hand over her back in a soothin' fashion. "I know Izzy." I said the words, 'cause they were for true; I knowed all too well the way she was feelin'.

I missed my Pa the most 'cause the loss of him was recent, but there was times I still missed my Ma somethin' fierce, causin' the ache in my chest from all them years ago to return.

I missed my brother too, but was fair comforted by the fact that he at least still drew breath.

Izzy lifted her head. "I try real hard not to think about 'em, but sometimes that hurts just as much as when I do." She sniffled. I didn't have nothin' to say, so I just kept soothin' her back.

"Ed?"

"Yeah, Izzy?"

"When I'm with ya, it helps me forget to hurt."

I hugged her tight. "I know what ya mean Izzy."

_***WYiMA***_

"Ed, when ya gonna ask that gal to marry ya?" Jake was never one for mincin' words. We was packin' the wagon, and Izzy had taken Jack with her to wash up, so I knowed she warn't around to hear us.

"What ya on about Jake?" I pretended not to know what he was askin'.

Jake give me an unbelievin' look. "You're sweet on each other. Ya even telled folks she was your wife. So's I'm askin' when are ya gonna propose?"

"Why don't ya mind yer business?"

"I always figured ya for a smart man, but the way you're actin' 'bout Izzy ain't smart Ed. That gal's set her cap for ya. I believe she'd be willin' to wait forever, but she shouldn't have to."

"Oh, so ya thinkin' 'bout askin' her for yourself?" I could feel the anger from the night afore returnin'.

Jake laughed and shook his head.

"How's Renie?" The bitterness I was feelin' showed in my voice.

Jake give me a sly grin. "Plannin' a weddin'."

His words stopped me in my tracks. "Ya asked her?"

He nodded. "Yep. We's gettin' married at the end of summer. So's ya can stop frettin' 'bout me tryin' to steal your girl." He smiled and pointed to his chest. "I am happily spoken for."

I couldn't stay mad at him, 'specially now that I knowed he warn't tryin' to steal Izzy. "I cain't believe she telled ya yes!" I bellowed afore slappin' him on the shoulder and laughin' loudly.

"Shut yer yapper!" Jake was laughin' too.


	25. Chapter 25

After I got the horses settled for the night, I went to sit next to Izzy where she was mendin' her blue dress by the light of the fire.

Jake had travelled with us for a full day into Mississippi, afore settin' out toward home early the next mornin'. After he left, I spent most of the ride thinkin' 'bout what I needed to say to Izzy.

I looked at her quietly sewin' and swallowed hard. "Izzy, I think it's time I had a word with ya."

She glanced up at me afore returnin' to her work. "What ya need to say Ed?"

This was a might harder than I'd figured. "If I'd of met ya back home, things would be different." I rubbed my hand over the back of my neck. "I'd a come to your house, and asked your Pa's permission to court ya."

Izzy stared up at me then, her brown eyes wide and lookin' sort of hopeful.

"But since your Pa has passed on, I reckon I'd of had to ask your Uncle." At mention of that scoundrel, Izzy's expression turned cloudy.

"That feller's got no say over me Ed. As far as I'm concerned, he ain't no kin of mine."

"Fair enough," I telled her with a nod of my head. "I guess what I'm tryin' to tell ya is that I care for ya Izzy. And even though things on the trail ain't how they would be back home, I'd still like to court ya. As best I can."

She was smilin' at me then. "Ed Cullen, I coulda died of old age waitin' for ya to finally ask."

"What…"

She shook her head, "Don't try and pretend ya ain't noticed how I've been workin' to get your attention, 'cause that kinda thing mayhap hurt a gal's feelin's."

"I'm sorry Izzy…"

She laughed then. "I'm just teasin'. But I am glad ya finally asked me. And to answer," she placed her hand on my arm, "I'd be mighty pleased for ya to court me Mister Cullen."

"For true?"

Izzy nodded. "Gospel." She peered up at me in a shy way then, "Do ya think it's proper for a feller to kiss a girl when they's courtin'?"

I was the one smilin' then, and kickin' myself for waitin' so long to tell her. "Cain't say as I care," I telled her afore pullin' her to me and pressin' my lips to hers ever so softly.

As soon as our lips was joined, it was as if all the feelin's I'd been holdin' inside was chompin' to break free. My body comed alive and I couldn't get close enough to her. As much as I tried to remember to be a gentleman, I couldn't stop myself from pullin' her close and lettin' my hands roam across her back and down to grasp onto her sides.

When I finally broke the kiss and pulled away, we was both pantin' and Izzy's body give out a little shiver. I let go of her and stared at the ground. "I'm so sorry Izzy."

"Ed, what're ya sorry for?" She asked, tryin' to catch her breath.

"I warn't much of a gentleman. I promise it won't happen again."

"Don't ya dare promise that!" Izzy said in a scoldin' tone. "I never cared what my first kiss would be like 'til I met ya, and I think as kisses go, that had to be one of the best." She placed her hand on my cheek, forcin' me to look at her. "And ya'd never hear a word of complaint if ya was to kiss me like that for the rest of my life."

When she put it that way, I couldn't help but kiss her again.


	26. Chapter 26

"When are we gonna cross the river Ed?" Izzy asked as she lay on her side facin' me, both of us too excited to sleep.

I'd telled her the trail we was takin' would carry us in a southerly direction, runnin' parallel to the Mississippi River.

"We go south 'til we reach Vicksburg, then we'll ferry across the river. From there on out, we'll be travellin' mostly due west all the way to Texas."

She was grinnin' as much as I was at the mention of Texas.

I warn't sure of her reasons, but for me, I was hopin' that as soon as we got there, Izzy'd be agreeable to gettin' hitched.

"How far to Vicksburg?"

"I reckon we've got more than two weeks, barrin' nothin' unforeseen happens."

_A problem with the wagon or one of the horses…_

But there was no call to worry Izzy with any of that.

"Ed?" She asked, lookin' serious. "Did ya ever court anyone afore me?"

I pondered the question, wonderin' if this was one of them times where a lie was better'n the truth, but decided that I didn't want no lies between Izzy and me. "I reckon ya could call it that," I started, layin' on my back and glancin' sideways at her, only to find her frownin'. "I was sweet on one girl afore I went to war."

"Did ya kiss her?"

"Once."

Izzy let out a huff, so's I thought I'd better tell her the whole story. "Her name was Ellie, and a few months after I left, she married an old feller who had a lot of money. I don't reckon she cared so much for me after all."

Izzy was quiet for a spell. "She was a fool Ed, but I'm right glad she was." I was thankful to see her smilin' again.

_***WYiMA***_

Izzy reckoned that since we was both so inexperienced at courtin' that we needed to practice. It didn't take long to figure out that she was talkin' 'bout practicin' the kissin'.

Since our first kiss, we made sure to practice kissin' afore fallin' asleep; again while packin' up the wagon in the mornin'. Izzy insisted on a kiss after I'd climbed up in the wagon to sit beside her, and a few more as we rode along, just for good measure.

Matter of fact, we'd done practiced kissin' so much that I had lost count.


	27. Chapter 27

The second mornin' after Jake left was one I'd remember for the rest of my days.

I'd gone to fetch water, when I heard Izzy let out a scream that just 'bout curled my hair. I dropped the bucket and ran back to camp as fast as I could, my gun drawn and ready. My heart sank as soon as my eyes found her, and I knowed that my worst fears was comin' true.

Two fellers who I'd never seen afore had a hold of her, and a third one was sittin' on the ground, cussin' and tendin' what looked to be a dog bite on his leg. Izzy was strugglin' while one of the two, a right nasty lookin' character, held a gun against her side.

Jack was tied up, but barkin' viciously.

"Well, if it isn't  _Mister_ Cullen," the one holdin' the gun on Izzy said, but there was no tone of respect in his words. The feller standin' on the other side of Izzy aimed his revolver at me.

"Mister, you'd best get your hands off my wife unless ya want me to kill ya where ya stand." I shouted.

He had the damn gall to laugh. "I don't think ya will, 'cause afore I drop I'll make sure to put a bullet in my  _intended._ "

Izzy gave him a witherin' look, "Now I know for sure that you're as stupid as ya are ugly," she was seethin'.

_That girl has no fear…_

"Didn't ya hear what Ed just said, James? I cain't be  _your_ intended, 'cause me and Ed are already  _married_."

_James…_

He gave her a leerin' smile and I felt my finger tighten 'round the trigger of my gun.

"Here's the thing 'bout that," he smiled bigger, showin' a mouthful of yellow teeth. "Ya both say you're married, and mayhap ya telled other folks that as well, but I don't believe it."

"Izzy, girl," the scoundrel sittin' on the ground piped up then. "Are ya for true married to this feller?"

"Not that I owe ya nothin' Uncle Luke, but  _yes._ We got married in Jackson."

"Well, now, that's easy enough to prove." Luke continued. "Where's your paper?"

I thought up a lie, quick. "Uh, we was in a hurry and telled the minister that we'd send for it once we was settled in Texas."

James cocked his pistol, "Ya was in a hurry to take liberties with  _my_ property." He barked.

"Ya dirty no good, low down, son of a snake! I ain't and never will be your property!" Izzy yelled in his face.

James grabbed a handful of her hair and forced her head back a little. I could barely breathe, I wanted so bad to kill him.

"James, cain't we settle this peaceably?" Izzy's uncle asked in a panic afore turnin' to Izzy. "See what ya done child by runnin' away? I cain't believe ya did somethin' so hateful, and then on top of things, ya sic your dog on me."

"Your friend  _kicked_ my dog! I wish Jack had a bit your whole damn leg off!"

Any other time and place, I'd a been shocked by Izzy's choice of language, but right at that moment, all's I could think about was that gun shoved into her ribs.

"You're lucky I didn't kill that mutt," James spat the words in Izzy's face while still pullin' her hair.

Jack was growlin' and pullin' at the rope, and for the first time, I noticed that he was favorin' one of his legs.

"I don't understand  _Uncle_  how ya could try and make me marry a man I  _hate and despise_."

James laughed again. "Ya don't understand much,  _Missy._ Fact is, your Uncle owes me a large sum of money. A lot more than he's ever gonna be able to repay. Soon as I laid eyes on ya, I was willin' to forgive the debt, so long as I got ya in trade." He tightened the grip on her hair and I watched as she blinked her eyes and looked away from him, seekin' me out. The pain I saw in those beautiful eyes liked to have broke my heart. "It was your Uncle's idea that we marry. Don't matter to me either way."

I choked a little at his words. He was the lowest of the low…

James turned his attention to me then, "Look  _Cullen,_ I'll make things real simple for ya. Put down that sidearm, and Isabella don't get hurt. I  _may_ even decide to let you live as well."

I looked at James and then at the other feller holdin' on to Izzy. One had a gun on me; the other had a gun on her. I didn't have a choice. I lowered my gun, never takin' my eyes off of Izzy's, tellin' her I was sorry without sayin' the words.

I could see the tears wellin' up in her eyes.

"Cyrus, get the gun," James telled the feller on the other side of Izzy.

After Cyrus took my gun, Izzy's Uncle spoke again, "James, there ain't no call to keep that gun on Izzy. The young feller's given ya his weapon."

James nodded and practically pushed Izzy at that feller Cyrus. "Watch her," he telled him afore saunterin' over to where I was standin'. He got right close to me, but we couldn't see eye to eye, 'cause he was a head shorter than I was. He then held the barrel of his pistol to my chin and cocked it. He spoke low, so's I was the only one to hear, "So tell me Cullen, was she a good fuck? Nice and tight? 'Cause if she is, I mayhap keep her around longer than I'd planned."

The whole world around me slowed to almost a halt. My heart started to pound loudly, so's it was all I could hear in my ears as I clenched and unclenched my fists. As soon as those foul words passed his lips, as soon as he  _dared_ speak of Izzy in such a base, coarse manner, I couldn't hold myself back any longer. Gun or no gun, I lunged at him and started into throwin' punches at both his face and his body.

Suddenly, I felt hands on me, followed by a sharp pain to the top of my head just afore my eyesight started to blur. The last thing I heared afore the blackness took me was Izzy screamin' my name.


	28. Chapter 28

It was the feelin' of somethin' touchin' my hand that woke me. Whatever it was, every now and then it would stop touchin' me, and push against my shoulder or my arm instead. Soon as I blinked my eyes open, I felt the searin' pain in my head. At the same moment I seened Jack right close beside me, and realized he was the one that woke me. I watched through eyes almost squinted shut as he licked at my hand and then nudged against my arm with his nose.

I reached for him and untied the rope what was around his neck. As soon as I did that, he started in to lickin' at my face. Normally I'd pull away, but this time I wrapped my arm around him as all the events of the mornin' come floodin' back to my mind.

Izzy strugglin' to get free.

James holdin' a gun to her side.

Jack wantin' to kill him every bit as much as I did.

Surrenderin' my gun.

The look in her eyes, knowin' I'd failed her.

Me hittin' James.

Izzy screamin'.

The only woman I'd ever love… and I'd failed to protect her.

I fought with the pain in my head and pushed against the ground, tryin' to get up. My body felt as heavy as lead, and my head hurt so bad that I thought it was 'bout to split in two. Once I was finally in a sittin' position, I looked around. Despite the dizziness makin' it hard to focus, I knowed that I was alone.

They'd taken Izzy.

Despair gripped me like never afore in all my life, and I heaved the contents of my stomach onto the grass. I kept heavin' 'til there warn't nothin' left to lose.

When I'd finally finished wretchin', I sat with my head bowed into my hands and cried like a small child. I felt Jack rubbin' against me again and I wrapped my arms around him as I continued to cry. "I've lost her boy." It was almost as if he knowed what I was sayin', 'cause he started in to whimperin' with me.

He stayed beside me 'til my tears was finished and was still there while I wrestled against the ache in my chest and the pain in my head to get up on my feet. When I finally pulled myself together and was able to stand without fallin' down, I had resolved myself as to what I had to do.

I had to follow them.

I had to save Izzy.

And I had to put a bullet in James Forrest.


	29. Chapter 29

"I'm sorry boy, I cain't take ya with me, but I'm leavin' ya in charge. Ya gotta be on guard 'til I find Miss Izzy and bring her back." It was with a heavy heart that I explained how things was to Jack. I swore that dog understood every word.

His leg warn't broken, but he was limpin', so's all I could figure was when he got kicked he landed on it wrong. But I was sure that, given time, it would heal. I seen to it that he had food and water afore I mounted my horse.

I was takin' the faster of the two beasts, leavin' the other one to graze. Afore settin' out, I said a little prayer to the Lord that no one with bad intentions would come across our wagon. I'd even left a note explainin' that I would be back directly, but was hopin' that, since we was a fair distance off the trail, our camp would go undisturbed.

Of course it was all for nothin' if I couldn't find Izzy and save her. I warn't gonna return without her, so if I failed, my wagon was fair pickin's and I warn't gonna be in a state to care.

"Come on Lightnin'," I said to my horse, "it's time to earn your name."

The bastards that had Izzy had a fair headstart, but at least I didn't have to waste time trackin' 'em. I knowed exactly where they was goin'. They was on their way back to Robertson County, and I knowed for certain and for sure, that if I had my way, they warn't gonna arrive there with my Izzy in tow, and they was gonna be at least one man short.


	30. Chapter 30

It were a moonless night, but even after sunset, me and Lightnin' rode on until it was so dark I could barely see my hand in front of my face. I knowed James and his men had to make camp, if only to give their horses a rest, but I was hopin' that I was at least gainin' on 'em.

"Ed," I heared someone whisper my name at the same time they was shakin' my shoulder. "Ed, wake up."

I opened my eyes wide, not even realizin' that I'd dozed off, only to find my friend Jake crouched in front of me with a worried look on his face. "Jake," I feared I was dreamin'. "How are ya here?"

Jake shook his head. "Long story, but I reckon I should tell ya it afore we search for Izzy."

"Izzy," I almost shouted at him. "ya know 'bout Izzy?"

He nodded. "When I got to Barlett, I stopped in the store there and the lady asked me where I was from. When I mentioned Robertson County, she asked if'n I knowed ya. Then I remembered Izzy tellin' me 'bout ya takin' her to church in Barlett."

I nodded.

"Well, as soon as the lady, Missus Reed, mentioned some fellers lookin' for Izzy, my ears perked up. One of 'em identified himself as Izzy's Uncle, and they was able to coax a lot of information from her, namely which route ya planned on travellin' to Texas."

Jake taked off his hat and runned his fingers through his hair, "I tell ya, Ed, as soon as I heared that, the hairs on the back of my neck stood straight up, and I knowed them fellers warn't gonna back down 'til they found ya."

"They caught up to us yesterday mornin'," I started to tell him.

He nodded again, "I know," he said afore placin' a hand on my shoulder. "I just got done buryin' a man who telled me quite a tale afore he died."


	31. Chapter 31

"It was Izzy's Uncle. He was near death when I found him; I did everythin' I could but…"

"What happened to him?"

"He telled me that he had first watch when they camped last night, and he just let Izzy go. He was feelin' right bad about everythin' that happened, and when he seened James for who he really was, he couldn't let her suffer through that kind of life."

"Izzy was on foot of course, and had only been gone a couple of hours afore James woke up. Izzy's Uncle couldn't convince him that he didn't let her go on purpose. They argued, and that James must have a hot temper, 'cause he shot that man and left him for dead."

"He asked me to find Izzy and tell her how sorry he was." Jake looked away from me then. "'Course I promised him I would, I'd be hard pressed to deny a dyin' man his last wish."

"Did ya look for her?"

Jake shook his head. "I'm sorry Ed, but Izzy's Uncle warn't sure if ya was dead or alive when they left ya. He stopped James from shootin' ya, but he was afeared that the crack on your head might of done ya in. You're my best friend, I had to know." His voice broke, and he looked at the ground.

"We gotta find her afore they do," I said as I stumbled to my horse.

"Hold on, Ed. You're a mess. Ya got dried blood on your head and your shirt. Ya ain't well."

"I'm fine. We're wastin' time."

"At least drink some water afore we head out."

"We gotta find her Jake," I was startin' to panic; "She might be hurt. They might already have her again!"

"I couldn't track her in the dark, but from what her Uncle telled me, I'm fair certain that Izzy headed west. At first light, I buried the man and checked the tracks of the other two. They didn't head north as I expected, but east. They didn't go after her."

Jake seened the confusion on my face. "Ed, they killed a man, and they warn't certain that they didn't kill you as well. The best thing they can do now is get a jump on the law, and ride as far away from here as possible."

I followed Jake back to James's campsite where we easily found Izzy's tracks. She'd headed west, just as Jake suspected.

We led our horses by the reins, and tracked Izzy on foot. Maybe it was born in him, but Jake was one of the best trackers I heared tell of in all of Robertson County, maybe in the whole of Tennessee. His Uncle Ned had taught him well, 'cause more times than not, he'd come upon a broken twig or half footprint that I missed.

It was slow goin', but I was hopeful that we'd find her soon. I prayed that she warn't hurt, but I was also afeared as to how James had treated her while she was his prisoner. It warn't somethin' I wanted to dwell on; there'd be time enough to sort him out once I had her safe in my arms.

The noon day sun was beatin' down on us 'cause we'd reached a place where the trees was thin. I stopped to survey the land, while Jake was crouched down on the ground, studyin' it.

"The footprints stopped," he telled me in a low voice as his head turned from side to side, all of a sudden his eyes grew wide and he pointed off to the left, past where I was standin'. "Ed, look."

My eyes followed in the direction he was pointin' and I seened somethin' in the distance. It looked to be pale blue in color. As I squinted my eyes and give a hard stare, I could just make out her form, curled up in the shade of the only tree in the clearin', my Izzy.

I ran to her then, half joyful, half afeared of what I might find. Jake was right beside me when I gathered her into my arms. "Izzy," I called to her. I thanked the Lord that she was breathin', but her lips was dry and her face was red, like she'd been too much in the sun. "Izzy, sweetheart," I called to her as I ran my hand over her cheek.

"Maybe try a sip of water, Ed." Jake said as he handed me his canteen.

Her eyes was still closed as I tipped the canteen against her lips. She took a breath and started coughin' and sputterin' as soon as the liquid touched 'em.

Then she opened her eyes.

"Ed?"

"I'm here Izzy. I got ya now."

"I was afeared ya was dead," her voice was hoarse, and her face took on a pained expression as she reached her hand up to my cheek. "I wanted to die too."

I frowned at her. "Izzy, don't say such things…"

"It's true." She smiled at me then and her eyes filled with tears as she ran her fingers down the side of my face. "Is ya really here?"

"I'm here. I promise ya, I'm here."

Her smile got bigger then. "I expect I look a fright," she whispered.

As usual, her mind was a puzzle, and I had to laugh as tears filled my own eyes. "Ya look as ya did the first time I ever laid eyes on ya." I pressed my lips softly to hers and pulled back to look at her again, drinkin' in the sight of her, "I never seened anythin' in my life as beautiful as what I'm lookin' at right now."


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A man on horseback can travel up to 100 miles a day…it's doubtful he'd be willing to put his horse through that, and Jake obviously didn't, but those are the statistics. Jake travelled less than fifty miles from where he left Izzy and Ed the first time, until he stopped in Bartlett and spoke with Missus Reed.
> 
> A fully loaded wagon traveled, on average, between ten and fifteen miles a day…and that is an optimistic number. It was dependent on road conditions; weather, etc., because whereas a horse can navigate trouble spots, it is much more difficult for a wagon to do so.

I kept my arms tight 'round Izzy's tiny form all the way back to our campsite. She kept tryin' to talk to me durin' the ride, but I wouldn't let her. She needed to rest after what she'd been put through.

As we got closer to camp, I prayed my hardest that we'd find everythin' undisturbed. I didn't think Izzy could take much more, and if anythin' had happened to Jack… well I couldn't even think on it.

I must have had the Lord's ear, 'cause when we arrived, everythin' was as I'd left it, and Jack and Izzy both like to have broke their necks tryin' to get to one another. Jake and me just sat back and laughed as Izzy wrapped that mutt in her arms and let him slobber all over her face.

It was one of the happiest moments in all my life.

***WYiMA***

After that, Izzy made it her mission to tend to me and Jack. She made me take off my shirt, and washed the blood from my head herself afore checkin' the wound. "Ed, it appears to be healin' but he cracked ya good."

"Don't I know it?" I answered. "Which one of 'em did it Izzy?"

"It was that Cyrus feller," she answered in a quiet voice afore kissin' my head near the wound and wrappin' her arms 'round my shoulders, then placin' a soft kiss on my cheek.

I could feel her little body tremblin' with the force of her sobs, so I pulled her onto my lap to comfort her. "Everythin's gonna be fine Izzy."

Jack's leg already seemed right much better than when I'd left, so it didn't look as if James had caused any permanent damage.

Jake and I had put off tellin' Izzy 'bout her Uncle 'til that evenin' when, by the light of the fire and with a strong cup of coffee in her hand, I felt she could face it.

She wiped away a few tears when Jake telled her about findin' him, and how his last words was about her, and how sorry he was for the way he'd treated her. She gave me and Jake a sad look and started in to whisperin'. "I heared James tell Uncle Luke that if I didn't get more agreeable to the situation, he was gonna take it out on him. I didn't realize it then, but now I think that he must have aimed to kill him." She wiped at her tears again and then gasped. She turned to look at me, a wild look in her eyes, causin' me to look around in a quick hurry, afeared that James and Cyrus had arrived to take their revenge on us.

"Ed, we gotta go back!"

I gave her a confused look. "What?"

"We gotta go back! James is gonna kill my brothers. He's as mean as a snake and telled Uncle Luke as much. He said, "Your little niece is wearin' on my nerves. Ya best find a way to settle her mind or I'm gonna make ya pay for it. And when I'm done with ya, I'll make your kin pay as well."

"He was talkin' 'bout my brothers, and Uncle Luke ain't here to defend them anymore." She jumped up then and ran toward the horses like she was plannin' to jump on the back of one of them and ride straight back to Robertson County.

It took Jake and me both to talk her out of it.

After Jake explained how James and Cyrus's tracks led East, and that they'd be stupid to go back home, she appeared to calm somewhat.

"Tomorrow," I telled her, "first town we get to, we're gonna tell the Sheriff everythin' that happened."

"And I'll wire my Pa and he'll make sure your brothers are safe," Jake added.

After that, she was better, and it warn't long afore she was curled up in front of the fire, fast asleep. I joined her directly.

It had been one Hell of a day.


	33. Chapter 33

Izzy gave me a curious look when she seened me in my Sunday best, 'til I explained that we was all havin' a meal in town after speakin' with the Sheriff. I even loaned Jake one of my nicest shirts. "Wear your red dress," I telled Izzy, earnin' a smile that liked to melt my heart, it was that beautiful.

Sheriff Welles was a right old and weather beaten feller. He telled us that he had been Sheriff years afore the war, and once it was over, the Yankees come to town and appointed him Sheriff again.

He frowned deeply and his mustache twitched afore he spoke again, this time in a whisper, "Bein' chosen by those Yankees isn't somethin' to be proud of, but I took the job 'cause I care about this here town."

The Sheriff and his deputy both listened carefully as we telled them our story. They decided to organize a group of men to go after James and Cyrus. Jake agreed to travel with them as far as the spot where he buried Izzy's Uncle Luke, 'cause the Sheriff was gonna have to examine the body. From there, Jake would finally be headin' home to Tennessee.

"Shouldn't take more than a day to gather the men, and I also gotta inform the Yankees, uh, I mean the  _Federal_ authorities." Sheriff Welles said with a grin.

Even though James was still out there somewhere, when we left the Sheriff's office, we all felt lighter, like all our cares had been swept away. The feelin' was even better after Jake wired his Pa.

There was only one matter standin' in the way of things bein' perfect and I was fixin' to right that situation afore the day was over.

I grabbed Izzy's hand in mine and started pullin' her up the street in the opposite direction from the wagon. "Ed, where ya takin' me? Jack's back there." She asked as she tried to pull away.

I stopped walkin' but didn't let go of her hand. "I'm doin' somethin' I shoulda done a long time ago. We're goin' to find a preacher, and we're gonna get hitched. And if any feller tries to take ya from me ever again, I'm gonna have the legal and moral right to shoot that feller dead."


	34. Chapter 34

Izzy's eyes was open wide, just starin' as I stood there holdin' her hand.

"Say somethin'." I spoke in a pleadin' tone, startin' to feel ashamed. After all, why would Izzy want to marry the likes of me? I let James take her away…

I didn't have much of a chance to think on it though, 'cause I was interrupted by Izzy lettin' loose with a loud guffaw followed by a snort.

It warn't ladylike in the least, but it was all Izzy.

"Ed Cullen, did ya just propose marriage to me?"

I nodded, "Um, yes, I expect I did…."

She stopped laughin' but kept the smile. "Well, I got two things to say. The first is that I cain't believe it took me gettin' kidnapped for ya to finally know your own mind."

Now it was my turn to do the starin'. My mouth mighta even fell open a little.

"And second, that is the sorriest proposal I ever heared tell of."

I opened my mouth to apologize, but Izzy put her fingers over my lips as she was wont to do.

"I expect ya to make it up to me when the preacher says 'Ya can kiss the bride', now let's go get hitched."

"I… I…."

"Ed close your mouth afore ya start catchin' flies."

Jake's laugh woke me from my stupor.

"Ya really wanna marry me Izzy?"

"Only since the day I met ya. Maybe afore, 'cause I was hidin' in your wagon for a full day afore ya knowed I was there."

I ain't never smiled so hard as I did then. I picked her up and spun her around, not givin' a fig if the whole town was watchin'.

Afeared she'd change her mind if I hesitated; I grabbed her hand again and set off at a fair steady pace in the direction of the closest church. We didn't get far afore Izzy stopped and refused to go another step. "We gotta get Jack."

"Izzy, why…" I was confused again. I was beginnin' to think that once I was married to Izzy, confusion would become my natural state.

" _Your_  best friend's gonna be at the weddin'," she said with a nod toward Jake. "So I want  _my_  best friend there as well."

I was beyond arguin' with her 'bout anythin'. We walked in silence to the wagon and retrieved our beloved mutt.

As happy as the preacher was to comply with our request of marriage, he warn't so happy when Izzy insisted on bringin' the dog inside the church. He pulled me aside afore the ceremony to ask if she was a might 'touched in the head' 'cause if that was the case, he couldn't marry us in good conscience.

I lied through my teeth and telled him that she was perfectly sane, but that she was feelin' a might nervous.

He seemed to accept that, and a quarter of an hour later, give or take, with Jake, the preacher's wife,  _and Jack_ , standin' as our witnesses, we finally said our 'I dos'.

I'd promised Izzy a kiss to remember, and that's exactly what I planned to give her. But first I needed to wrap her in my arms and enjoy the feel of her against me. I looked down at her face. "Is ya really and truly my Missus?"

She gave me a jubilant smile, "Just as sure as you're my Mister. Now kiss me."

So I did. This kiss was different from any other we'd shard. Even though I was in the house of The Lord, I was like a man possessed. From the first moment I'd met her, I'd been drawn to her, and this was no different. The feel of her lips, so soft, so perfect against mine sent a rush through my body that I felt all the way in my toes. It brought my entire body to life.

Some parts was more alive than others 'cause of that kiss…

As our lips moved together, my mind raced ahead, until I could see glimpses of our future. Holdin' Izzy in my arms as she slept; Izzy, her belly swollen with my child; Izzy laughin' with a young'un on her hip….

So lost was I in the kiss and the feel of Izzy in my arms that I barely noticed the preacher clearin' his throat, or Jake softly laughin' beside me. It was Jack's whimperin' that finally caused me to break the kiss. I didn't look at any of 'em, my eyes was only for Izzy. "I love ya Izzy. More than anythin'."

_My beautiful wife_

My heart was filled to burstin' with happiness at the thought….

"I love ya too, husband," she telled me with a smile, but I could see the tears wellin' up in her eyes.

Congratulations sounded all around us, and I turned to my best friend. "I don't know how I can thank ya for everythin' ya done for me and Izzy, Jake. " I telled him as I grabbed onto his shoulder. "You're a true friend to me, and I hope someday I can find a way to pay ya back."

Jake, ever smilin', give us each a hug afore speakin', "I reckon ya can name your first boy after me, and we'll call it square."

Izzy giggled and I laughed. "I don't know about that Jake, I mean, I already named the  _dog_ after ya."

Now that got Izzy goin', "Ed Cullen, ya know as well as I do that Jack was named for the town of Jackson, where he found us." She was scoldin' but had a smile on her face, "Ya have no fear of the Lord to be standin' in His house and tellin' lies."

Everyone laughed, preacher included.


	35. Chapter 35

After we had a bite of supper with Jake, I went to see about gettin' a room at the local inn. It warn't much to speak of, but it was clean and looked to be comfortable. I was fixin' to pay for two rooms, but Jake refused, sayin' he'd just as soon sleep in the wagon with Jack.

I knowed it was 'cause he felt the need to guard our things, and once again I was beholdin' to him.

"I'm sorry I didn't have a ring for ya," I whispered as I kissed Izzy's fingers.

"I've got a ring," she whispered back, causin' my eyes to widen in surprise.

Izzy, seein' my expression, continued. "Well, I don't have it with me, but my Mam give me her ring afore she died. She said there was no reason to bury it with her, and she'd rather me have it. 'Cause it was her choice, Pap didn't mind." Izzy's eyes filled with tears at the mention of her parents.

"I was thinkin' 'bout my folks today as well." I telled her. "I reckon it's a natural thing to do on your weddin' day."

She smiled through the tears and nodded.

I left her there to wash up in our room, and met Jake downstairs. After our own washin' up, he talked me into havin' a beer at the tavern.

I was right quiet, the night ahead preyin' on my mind.

"Quite a day," Jake murmured into his beer.

"That it was. I'm right glad ya was here with me Jake."

Jake smiled. "I'm glad ya was able to have someone from home stand up for ya."

"I feel a might put out that I won't be there for yours."

"It's alright Ed, mayhap Renie and me will come see ya afore long." He grinned again.

I cut the evenin' short, but not afore buyin' a bottle of somethin' to take back to the room.

When I got there, the door handle turned easily under my hand. I was just fixin' to fuss at Izzy for not lockin' the door when I caught sight of her in the bed. She had the covers pulled up to her nose, so's all I could see was her big brown eyes peepin' out at me.

"Izzy, what's gotten into ya?" I tried my best not to laugh.

"Ed, since I don't have no nightclothes, I ain't wearin' nothin' but my shift, and I'm that embarrassed 'bout it."

At the mention of her shift, I recollected the time I seened her bathin' in the creek. I bit my lip so's not to moan out loud at the memory, and my pecker started strainin' against the front of my trousers. I calmed down as I got closer to the bed, and got a look at Izzy's worried expression. It was at that moment that I was right glad I'd thought to buy the port.

"Izzy, what say we have a drink? I reckon we both need to calm our nerves." I said as I sat on the bed at her feet.

She sat up, keepin' the covers around her, as she watched me pour. When I handed her a glass, the thought occurred that Izzy probably didn't know much, if anythin' 'bout layin' with a man.

I'd heared as much as I ever needed to know while in the war. At the time, I warn't proud of the paths my mind had travelled while I lay awake at night, ponderin' what the other fellers had said. But now, I was almost thankful for their fornicatin' ways, 'cause with no Pa to give me advice, I would for certain have stumbled through my weddin' night a lovesick, although a wholly ignorant man.

I waited 'til Izzy was finished her drink afore bringin' up the subject.

She held the glass out, and I poured her another. "Izzy, there's somethin' I want to ask, but it's of an  _indelicate_ nature." I swallowed the last of my port and fixed myself another.

"What is it Ed?" I noticed that she was takin' her time drinkin' the second glass.

"Well, how much do ya know about what goes on in the marriage bed?"

Izzy's eyebrows shot up and her cheeks turned pink. "Um, well, I reckon I know just 'bout everythin'."

My mouth fell open in surprise. "Ya what?"

Izzy chewed on her lip and then reached out to lay her hand on my arm. "My Mam must of known she'd never see my weddin' day. When Pap was gone to the war and my brothers was out of the house workin' the farm, she would tell me things…"

I watched as Izzy's face turned a deeper shade of red. "At first I couldn't believe it, and I'll admit that I found it right hard to take. Especially considerin' the notion that your own parents was…." Izzy shuddered lightly and didn't finish the thought. "But as time went on, I started to notice the smiles that married folk would give one another, like they was sharin' a secret from the rest of the world, and it all kinda fit together somehow."

I downed the rest of my port and watched as Izzy did the same. After settin' our glasses on the side table, next to the bottle, I turned toward her.

"Well, Missus Cullen, I'm hopin' by tomorrow, mayhap we'll have our own secret smile to share."

Izzy reached up and touched the side of my face with her hand, "I believe I'd like that Mister Cullen. I'd like that very much."


	36. Chapter 36

"Ed?"

"Yeah, Izzy?" I answered between kisses.

"Ya got on too many clothes," she breathed the words against my lips.

"Girl," I gasped out as I tried not to choke on my own tongue, "ya say the most unexpected things," I telled her with a smile. "But I suppose, to be fair, I should shed some of 'em."

She smiled like she'd just won a small victory.

I could feel Izzy's eyes borin' into me as I removed my boots and then my trousers. The gasp I heared escape her mouth as soon as my trousers hit the floor liked to make me laugh out loud.

"Ed!" She almost hollered my name. "Why ain't ya wearin' no drawers under your trousers?"

I did laugh then. "My dear wife, if ya ain't noticed, it's comin' onto summertime and it's fair hot down here in Mississippi."

"I know but, I guess I was just a might surprised."

Knowin' full well that my shirt tails was long enough to cover where I needed 'em to, I sat down on the bed and took Izzy's hand in mine.

"Now, we's even. I ain't wearin' nothin' except my shirt."

She reached up with her free hand and played with my collar. "I'm scared."

I wrapped my arms around her then, pullin' her to me, "I've got ya Izzy, I ain't gonna let nothin' bad happen, I promise."

She nodded her head against my chest. "Mam said it sometimes hurts…. the first time."

I frowned 'cause I didn't rightly remember hearin' that afore. "For true?" I whispered.

She nodded again.

My head was spinnin' in confusion, "Izzy, I don't wanna hurt ya…"

"I know. I reckon it cain't be but so bad, and Mam said it's only the once."

I let go of her then and turned away in order to stare at the floorboards.

Her soft touch on my arm was enough to pull me from my musin's, and I turned to face her again. "I don't mind Ed, truly. When I said 'I do', it meant I was ready to be your wife in every way that the good Lord intended."

She pushed away the covers afore wrappin' her arms around my shoulders. "I love ya, Ed."

I looked into those brown eyes, so trustin', and kissed her sweet lips. "Oh, Izzy. I love ya too."

We just sat there for a time, not movin', as I wrassled against the thought of hurtin' her. There commenced a battle which pitted my muddled brain against the burnin' fire of my physical need. It warn't long afore the flesh was winnin'. I sighed in defeat, knowin' it was a lost cause, 'specially when Izzy was sidin' with my pecker.

I let my hands travel along the smooth planes of her back until they come to rest on her hips, afore leanin' in to whisper in her ear, "Can I see ya, Izzy?"

She took a deep breath afore noddin' and I pulled back so's I could take her in.

The light in the room was dim enough so's I couldn't see through the thin material of her shift, but it warn't no matter 'cause I'd committed the vision of Izzy bathin' to memory. I then gently pushed the material of the shift away from one of her shoulders, layin' it bare, afore placin' a lingerin' kiss there against her soft skin.

I pulled back and looked into her eyes, "Would it be alright if we took this off?" I asked as I touched the material of her shift with my fingertips.

She didn't answer, instead she grasped the hem of her shift and began liftin' it up. I sat there, struck dumb, as Izzy pulled it over her head and tossed it to the floor.

_Oh my sweet Jesus…_

The memory of Izzy warn't nothin' compared to the reality. She was like a dream; all soft curves and hidden secret places that I yearned to explore.

My blushin' beauty.

Never in a million years would I have considered myself worthy of havin' her.

But she was mine, and I was hers. And I had the paper to prove it.

"You're beautiful beyond words Isabella." I telled her as the urgent need to join with her consumed me. "Izzy, I'm gonna take off my shirt now," I telled her, still attemptin' to go at a slow pace.

All she did was nod in reply.

I fumbled for such a time with the buttons, my maimed hand not cooperatin' in the least, that she finally giggled and pushed my hands away. I didn't watch her as she unbuttoned my shirt, 'cause I was fair mesmerized by the way her bosom rose and fell with each breath she took.

Once she worked the last button, I heard her gasp again and looked back at her face. She warn't lookin' up at me though, she was lookin' down at my…..

_Oh_

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"I just never seen, um,…" She give me a puzzled look.

"Ya never seen a man's privates afore?"

"I reckon I seen 'em, when my brothers was little and used to run around nekked as jaybirds afore Mam give 'em a bath." She looked down again, still starin'.

"I just never seen one lookin' all  _stiff_ like that." She was blushin' harder than I'd ever seen afore. "Is there somethin' wrong with it?"

I laughed again, but Izzy just kept starin' at my pecker.

"God's truth girl, I'm that glad I married ya." I looked down, noticin' that my wife's questionin' hadn't done nothin' to change the situation down south. "Izzy, didn't your Ma tell ya 'bout what happens afore a couple is joined? How the man's privates get a might  _excited._ "

Izzy gasped and looked up at me. "I don't recollect her sayin' that Ed. So it's supposed to be doin'that?"

"It wants to join with ya," I bent down to kiss her lips again.

"It does?"

"In the worst way, sweet girl." I telled her afore yankin' my shirt off the rest of the way and sendin' it to lie on the floor with her shift.

"I reckon ya better give it what it's askin' for then," she whispered as she lay back, pullin' me on top of her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In those days, the 'drawers' that men wore under their trousers were basically loose long johns, I don't blame Ed for going commando in the summertime, who would want to wear two pairs of long pants?


	37. Chapter 37

The feel of flesh against flesh just 'bout sent me into a frenzy, but through some miracle I was able to make my mind focus. "Izzy," I whispered, "there's things I should do to make this better, for ya…"

She froze and stared up at my face, "How do ya know that Ed? I thought ya ain't done this afore."

I shook my head afore the wrong notion took hold in her mind. "For true, I ain't never done more than kiss a girl, and only the once, afore meetin' ya."

She studied my face with wide eyes as I continued.

"I heared fellers talk, mostly when I was in the army."

Her mouth fell open as her expression turned a might angry, "That's what fellers talk about? They go around braggin' to one another about the  _private things_ they do with their wives?" She was close to shoutin' the words.

"No, no, Izzy," I brushed my hand against the side of her face to calm her. "I'm ashamed to say that it warn't none of the married fellers doin' the talkin'."

This time her eyes pert near bugged out of her head.

"I like to think that the married fellers had more respect for their wives than that. I know I do."

She breathed out a sigh of relief then. "I'm glad Ed, 'cause I don't know what I'd do if'n ya was to tell anyone…".

"Rest your mind sweetheart." I calmed her with a kiss so passionate and lingerin' that, after a time, I could feel all her worries melt away from her little body. I could also feel my manhood hard and wantin', pressed against the place where it wanted most to be.

I leaned up on my elbows and looked down at her; she was fair glowin' beneath me. I couldn't resist the urge to kiss more than her lips, so I bent my head and left a soft kiss on each breast. Izzy started in to squirmin' and put her hands on my shoulders, but she didn't push me away. With the gentlest of touches, and startin' at her neck, I let the tips of my fingers trace along her skin.

I stopped when I reached her breasts and teased each peak, amazed at the way her body was reactin', her little moans and sighs nearly sendin' me out of my mind with want. I continued to kiss and touch her 'til Izzy started in to liftin' her hips and rubbin' against me.

It was more than I could stand. "Izzy, I need to join with ya now, if that's agreeable." I could barely choke out the words.

She stared up at me, but didn't answer.

"Let me love ya, my sweet girl," I whispered.

She nodded as she gave voice to her answer. "Yes, please."

I positioned myself between her legs and stroked against the flesh beneath her soft curls with my fingertips, as I captured her lips in mine once again. After takin' a deep breath, I slowly guided myself inside. The feelin' was unlike anythin' I'd ever felt. I had only made it part of the way inside her warm, tight passage, when I found the need to squeeze my eyes shut and hold still, so's I could calm my frantic heart.

After a moment, I pushed further inside. Izzy's little whimper caused me to open my eyes and give her a sorrowful look. "Are ya hurtin' Izzy?"

"Not much, it just feels strange." Her voice was a quiet whisper. I stilled my movements for fear of causin' her more pain.

Soon, Izzy was buckin' her hips against me. "I think I'd like it better if'n ya moved Ed."

Bein' joined with Izzy was what I imagined heaven to must be like, and once I withdrew and pushed in again, I couldn't stop myself from doin' it over and over again. I whispered words of love, and proceeded to kiss her lips, her breasts, her shoulders, and any other part of her body that I could reach as I kept up the steady rhythm.

Izzy's soft moans spurred me on, and I come to realize that once I really began to move, I couldn't have stopped if my life depended on it. As soon as Izzy started bringin' her hips up to meet mine, it warn't long afore a feelin' of utter euphoria overcame me. I cried out Izzy's name while spillin' my seed deep inside her.

After collapsin' half on top of Izzy, and half on the mattress, I felt her soft fingers strokin' along my back.

It was then that I felt the shame for how I'd behaved. "Izzy, I'm sorry," I whispered.

"What ya sorry for Ed?" She asked in a quiet low voice.

"I know it warn't enjoyable for ya like it coulda been, but I warn't able to slow down once I started, I didn't have the will…"

"Shh," she soothed as she continued to stroke my back. "It  _was_  enjoyable. 'Specially considerin' that it was the first time for us. Ya make me feel loved Ed, with everythin' ya do. This warn't no different."

I leaned up so's I could look at her face; the smile I found there warmed my heart.

"That's 'cause I love ya, Izzy Cullen, with all my heart."

She nodded. "And I love ya too, Ed Cullen, forever and always."


	38. Chapter 38

The feel of the breeze blowin' through the curtains cooled down the air in the room a bit, but didn't do much for me. There was other things, besides the heat, makin' me sweat.

I looked to the side and found Izzy lyin' with her back to me. Sometime durin' the night, she'd kicked off the sheet, and I could just make out her pale naked form in the darkness.

I ached to reach for her, to touch her, to have her again, but I knowed she needed her rest. Besides, it would be a long time 'til we was able to spend the night in a proper bed again.

Finally, I buried all the wantin' feelins deep down inside and turned to face away from her, tryin' to fall back to sleep.

The feel of Izzy's body pressed against my back was what woke me later. She had her arm throwed over my side, which was oftentimes the way she slept when we was by the campfire, but then we was always fully clothed.

My pecker was already standin' at attention, but feelin' Izzy's naked bosoms against my back was makin' me so hard it was downright painful.

When I feeled her fingers brushin' along my chest, I knowed she was lyin' there awake, so I turned to face her, catchin' her in my arms as I did.

She looked a little surprised, but happy. I kissed her lips. "Cain't ya sleep?"

She shook her head.

I just held her, lovin' the feelin' of nothin' between us, afore givin' a contented sigh.

After a while, Izzy started to speak in a whisper. "Ed, remember how ya said that your, your…  _man part,_ gets  _stiff_  when it wants to join with me?" I couldn't tell in the dark, but I was fair certain that she was blushin'.

I held in the laugh that was tryin' to escape, and just gave her an answerin' nod, knowin' full well she could feel my  _stiffness_ against her leg.

"Does it want to join with me right now?" She asked, so low I could barely hear her.

"Always, sweet girl, but I won't let him have his way 'cause you're tired."

She looked up at me, her eyes wide and innocent, "I don't reckon I'm too tired. If ya want to… I think I'd like to…"

She didn't finish her thought afore I spoke, "Izzy, are ya not feelin' poorly at all? I don't want to hurt ya."

"No Ed. It burned a little last night, but it was tolerable. And since Mam said it only hurts the once, I think I'd like to try it without the chance of the hurtin'."

Afore I could stop myself, my lips was on hers. When I finally broke apart from her, I smiled. "Izzy, ya are a dream come true for me."

In the dark of our room, I spent the time explorin' with my fingers and lips, findin' it easy to be bold, whereas I couldn't the night afore, when the nervous feelins had been rulin' my actions.

It didn't take long to discover the touches that could make Izzy squeal and wriggle.

By the time I entered her, she was dreamy eyed and fair glowin', becomin' even more so as we moved together. I was more than happy when, just afore I fell over the edge, she got to experience the euphoria I'd felt, and with our lips touchin', we breathed in each other's joy of the moment.


	39. Chapter 39

In the mornin', I treated Jake and Izzy to a big breakfast at the the inn afore startin' back on our journey. We was sayin' goodbye to Jake today, and as much as I looked forward to bein' alone with Izzy, I was feelin' right sad to see my friend go.

We'd said goodbye twice in the last couple of months, but somethin' in my heart telled me that it would be a long time afore I'd see him again after today.

But, as good a friend as he was to me, it didn't alter the fact that I wanted to hit him on accounta the way he kept snickerin' durin' the meal.

Afore I had a chance to call him on it though, Izzy was all over him. No flies was ever likely to light on my Missus, that was for true.

"Jake Black, if ya don't mind me askin', what's it that's got ya sittin' over there actin' all smug, like ya know a funny tale ya ain't sharin' with the rest of us."

He looked up at my wife with a gleam in his eye, and I knowed this conversation warn't gonna end well.

"Well, now that ya ask Izzy, I'll tell ya." He took a sip of his coffee afore continuin'. "When I met up with ya this mornin' I thought I'd be intrudin' on a  _lovers' breakfast._ " I could see Izzy's cheeks already startin' to pink. "Ya know, where ya'd be all mooney-eyed with each other, and for true, I've seen some of that, but mostly I find it amusin' that y'all are eatin' like a couple of horses." He then let out a laugh, "So I reckon ya was both up to some strenuous activities last night which give ya'll some fearsome appetites."

I couldn't stop myself from kickin' him under the table.

Izzy was red-faced by now and her mouth was hangin' open in surprise. Didn't take long 'til she recovered herself though.

She clamped her mouth shut afore scowlin' at Jake. "You, Jacob Black, are  _no_ gentleman."

Jake, the ass, laughed again. "Never claimed to be."

After Izzy got all quiet like, I could see the remorse showin' on Jake's face. "Izzy, I'm sorry. My Ma is always smackin' me for my teasin'."

Izzy gave him a narrow stare. "She should be smackin' ya. All the time."

Jake laughed again. "I hope ya get the chance to meet her someday, she'd like ya."

In the end, there was no hard feelins when we said our goodbyes. Havin' brothers, I was certain that Izzy was used to a fair amount of teasin'.

As we pulled out of town and onto the trail, I looked beside me to find Izzy smilin' and huggin' Jack to her side.

I'd entered this town a single man, and was leavin' it married up proper.

I reckoned I'd never been happier in all my life.


	40. Chapter 40

"Did ya ever have to kill a man Ed? In the war?" Izzy had been quiet for so long as we rode that I'd been afeared she was sleepin' while sittin' up.

When I didn't answer her question right away, she seemed to regret the askin' of it.

"Forgive me; I don't know what I was thinkin'. My Pap always said that I was a might too curious for my own good. I understand if ya don't want to talk about it…"

I switched the reins to my left hand and reached down to squeeze hers that was closest to me. "Izzy, don't fret. I'm fixin' to answer, but recollectin' those days spent in the war ain't somethin' I often do."

It was hard to form the words. Would Izzy think less of me upon hearin' the truth?

It mattered little; for I was determined there'd be no secrets between us.

"I shot a lot of men," I looked ahead at the trail, not lettin' my gaze waver; not wantin' to see the expression on her face. "Some died right then, some mayhap died later, others maybe not at all." I drew in a deep breath. "It was both harder and easier than I reckoned it would be. At the start of the war, I heard fellers like my brother braggin' on how they was gonna kill a hundred Yankees. They was right excited just to think on it. By the time I was old enough to join them, they was battle weary, and most of them just wanted to go home. Emmett still won't talk about the killin'. "

She wrapped her arm around mine and leaned her head against me.

"When you're in the thick of it, I reckon a man's natural instinct to survive kicks in, 'cause when he's faced with  _kill or be killed,_ the choice is easy." I paused as I thought about that. "It shouldn't be that easy to kill a man Izzy…."

"It's the livin' with it afterward that's hard. Emmett had the worst of it; he had nightmares for a long while after the war, mayhap he still does…"

"My Pap had nightmares," Izzy telled me in a whisper then. Things was just so bad all the way around when he come home. The nightmares was just a part of it."

She was quiet for a long while afore speakin' again. "What made your brother pick up and move to Texas?"

I smiled, thinkin' 'bout the change in Emmett as soon as he found Rosa.

"He met a girl. Rosa was up from Texas, carin' for her Granny durin' the war, 'cause her Uncles was both away fightin'. Emmett met her just as she was fixin' to return home and he fell hard." I turned to her then to see her smilin' up at me. "The change that come over him was truly somethin' to see. He'd been so quiet since the war. Rosa brought back his smile."

"They corresponded for a time, but Emmett couldn't abide bein' away from her. As soon as he was able to secure promise of steady work in Texas, he packed up and left. A few months later, we received word that he was managin' a farm for some feller and he and Rosa was married."

Izzy seemed to think about that.

"So what made ya decide to leave Tennessee?"

"There was nothin' there for me and Pa any more. The only person I was leavin' behind was Jake. Besides, my Pa was wore out, and me and Emmett had hoped he'd get his strength back in Texas, but it warn't meant to be."

Izzy squeezed my arm. "I'm sorry your Pa couldn't make the journey with ya, Ed."

I leaned down and kissed the top of her head. "I do miss him, and that's a fact," I telled her, "but I like to think that he may have had a hand in seein' to it that I warn't alone.

Her smile was joyful. "I think maybe he was lookin' out for the both of us."


	41. Chapter 41

About a week after our marriage, Izzy and I found ourselves settlin' into a comfortable routine.

As comfortable as we could be on the trail anyhow.

To make our provisions last longer, I'd taken to huntin' early every mornin', and Izzy would cook us up a fine breakfast.

Since marryin', we also both found particular joy in washin' up  _together_ , although most times it delayed our gettin' back on the trail, as I discovered that washin' up with Izzy led to doin' other things with Izzy…

I warn't about to start complainin' though, even if it took us a year to reach Texas.

It was durin' one of those times that I confessed the lie I'd told back when I saw her washin' up in just her shift. At first her face grew red with anger then, in true Izzy fashion, she throwed water all over me.

'Course I couldn't let that stand, so I throwed water on her as well. Afore I knowed it, Izzy got a wicked gleam in her eye.

"Well I reckon I better give ya a better eyeful today, make ya forget the one ya got when ya was a single man." And with them words, she pulled her soakin' wet shift off, and threw it at my head. As soon as I pulled it away and blinked my eyes open, all I could see standin' afore me was a soakin' wet Izzy, naked as the day she was born.

"Isabella Cullen! I'm fair shocked at this behavior," I said the words with a smile as I stalked closer to her. Izzy laughed in my face and took off runnin'.

I didn't have to give much of a chase afore I caught her. I reckoned she planned it that way.

"Whatever will I do with ya now?" I asked her after I'd captured her in my arms.

"Ed, just make sure ya spread the quilt on the ground first, so's we don't sit on a anthill."

I laughed and grabbed the quilt.

_***WYiMA***_

As we made our way closer to Vicksburg, Izzy spent almost an entire day singin' and rummagin' around in the back of the wagon. Every now and then, I would turn to watch her, until it became clear what she was tryin' to do. She'd been slidin' things to and fro 'til she had just enough room to spread the quilt partway across the bottom of the wagon.

_"Tell me the tales that to me were so dear,_   
_Long, long ago, long, long ago,_   
_Sing me the songs I delighted to hear,_   
_Long, long ago, long ago,_   
_Now you are come all my grief is removed,_   
_Let me forget that so long you have roved._   
_Let me believe that you love as you loved,_   
_Long, long ago, long ago."_

"Izzy, what ya doin that for?" I asked, already knowin' the answer.

She sat down on the quilt and smiled at me. "I thought that if I could make it comfortable, we could sleep in here tonight. It might feel almost like we was in a bed again."

"More'n likely it'll feel like we're sleepin' on the floor." I teased.

"Oh hush." She telled me, afore startin' to sing again.

_"Do you remember the paths where we met?_   
_Long, long ago, long, long ago._   
_Ah, yes, you told me you'd never forget,_   
_Long, long ago, long ago._   
_Then to all others, my smile you preferred,_   
_Love, when you spoke,_   
_gave a charm to each word._   
_Still my heart treasures the phrases I heard,_   
_Long, long ago, long ago._

When we stopped for the night, I surprised Izzy by pullin' off the tarp coverin' the rolled up mattress I was carryin' to texas.

"What else ya got under there Ed?"

"The bedframe for the mattress."

Her eyes lit up, "We're gonna have a proper bed once we get to Texas?"

"Yes Ma'am." I answered with a smile.

I unrolled the mattress after makin' a spot for it, not carin' that I'd have to stow it back again the next day. I didn't mind the extra trouble as long as it made Izzy happy. And that mattress did just that.

'Course Jack took to it right away, figurin' it was  _his_ bed as well.

I showed him what was what.

I never did give that dog enough credit for his smarts though. The way I figured it, he waited around outside the wagon every night for the sounds of Izzy and me sleepin', afore climbin' up onto that mattress anyhow.


	42. Chapter 42

"Izzy, oh, Izzy…" I called out her name as she clung to me, her body shakin' and quiverin' as we found our release together, pantin' and whisperin' words of love for no one's ears but our own.

I was right proud of the fact that I could fulfill my wife's needs when we joined together. I was fair certain that not every man could boast the same ability. Not that it warn't possible, 'cause the way I seened it, if a feller was willin' to take the time, it was a palpable way to show your wife how much ya love her.

Knowin' that my Izzy was happy, helped take away a portion of the guilt I was feelin' on account of her bein' forced to spend the first weeks of our married life on the trail.

She woke up cheerful every mornin', made the best of the situation at hand, and never complained about that which she couldn't change.

Our days was filled with quiet talk as we rode along, and our nights was spent holdin' onto each other.

I was beyond content.

We were probably about a day's travel from Vicksburg when she started behavin' strangely. She kept fidgetin' in her seat and wrappin' her arms around her middle. After a while of that, she begged me to stop the wagon so's she could relieve herself, but when we started movin' again, she didn't seem no better.

After stoppin' at least four times, with the same result, I begged her to tell me what was ailin' her.

She looked fair mortified as she stared back at me.

"Izzy, I'm your husband, ya can tell me anythin'. I need to know how to help ya."

"Oh, Ed. I don't want to say." She hung her head and looked down at her lap.

I hesitated afore askin' her in a low voice, "Is it your monthly?" I didn't know what else to ask. She'd had it a few days afore, and explained to me 'bout how often she got it.

"No, it's too early for that." She moaned a little, but it warn't the kind of moan I liked to hear.

"Izzy, please." I couldn't bear to see her hurtin'.

She drew in a deep breath. "I just keep gettin' this feelin' like I need to make water, and it burns a little, but when I try to go, most times I cain't and even if I can, it hurts the same after."

If there was ever a time I missed my Ma, it was now. I was fair certain that Izzy was in need of a woman's advice.

I ain't never felt so helpless.

Fortune smiled upon us the next day in the form of a wagon pulled off the side of the trail. Izzy had been feelin' so poorly that she'd gone to lie down in the back some time afore. Knowin' that James Forrest was most likely still on the loose, I was thankful that she was out of sight as I slowed the horses.

I kept a hand on my sidearm, just in case as I come up alongside.

"How do?" I asked the lady standin' in front who was pointin' the barrel of a musket right at me. I didn't miss the glimpse of the young-uns who was peepin' from under the wagon cover.

She eyed me suspiciously. "Ya travellin' alone?"

"No Ma'am, got my wife and dog in the back." I nodded my head toward the place where Jack was lyin' beside Izzy. "Ya'll need help?" I asked, hopin' she'd consider pointin' that firearm away from me.

She stared a beat longer, sizin' me up, afore lowerin' the gun. "Ya don't look like a bandit, so I reckon ya must be tellin' the truth."

"Yes, Ma'am."

Turned out that the Elder family, Ramona and her husband Peter along with three young 'uns, was travellin' the same direction as us. They had stopped, lookin' for a place to pause for the night, when we'd come up on 'em.

We ended up campin' beside 'em, knowin' that sometime the next day we'd go our separate ways as they continued south, and we turned west at Vicksburg.

I was listenin' to Mister Elder talk about leavin' their home just south of where me and Izzy got hitched, headed to his Uncle's farm near Natchez. They was goin' to farm it for him, 'cause work back home had dried up; seemed like times was hard all over the south, and not enough work to go 'round in some places.

Lots of folks was on the move.

While we conversed, I noticed Izzy seated across from us, havin' a heart to heart with Missus Elder. Up until that time, the poor woman had spent the better part of an hour wranglin' her young 'uns to bed, but now there was nothin' but silence comin' from the direction of their wagon.

I smiled to myself, wonderin' if she'd had to knock 'em in the head to put 'em to sleep, 'cause those children was wild. At that exact moment, Izzy looked up and caught me smilin'. She returned it tenfold, and suddenly I was feelin' the need to retire to our wagon and wrap my arms around my Missus.

We warn't long for bed after that.

Knowin' how poorly she'd been for more than a day, I didn't press for nothin' more than holdin' her close. It was enough for now.

The next day, Izzy seemed brighter, happier, closer to bein' her old self. I marveled at the change.

"Izzy, are ya well?" I asked.

She nodded and hugged my arm. "Ramona was heaven sent to me Ed. I'm feelin' right much better today."

Izzy's answer only served to confuse me more. "How'd she help ya Izzy? I was fixin' to have ya see a doctor once we got to Vicksburg."

"If I keep improvin' there won't be a need. For true, all she did was give me some needed advice, and some medicine for pain and such, no more than my Mam would have done if she was here." She sighed afore continuin' in a whisper. "Seems what I got is more common than not for a newly wed woman."

I looked down at her, only to see her red faced and hidin' her eyes from me.

I decided right then and there not to question any further. If Izzy wanted me to know somethin', she'd tell me. I didn't need to go lookin' for more problems then I already had.

The notion of dealin' with women's troubles was a bafflin' one to me. I was afeared that tryin' to solve that puzzle would prove to be more difficult than facin' a whole passel of Yankees armed with nothin' more than my bayonet. If nothin' else, a feller should be aware of his limits.


	43. Chapter 43

Vicksburg was a bustlin' place, and not all the inhabitants seemed to be on the right side of the law.

Almost everywhere we turned, there was Yankee troops millin' around, and that could only mean that there had been trouble in the city. The sooner we was through and across the river the better.

Only, now that we was here, I had to take some time for a task that couldn't be put off any longer. I needed to send notice to my brother of where I was, as well as let him know that I warn't gonna be arrivin' alone.

I could just imagine the look of confusion on Emmett's face when he read that I'd gotten hitched; the look that would, most assuredly, give way to one of happiness.

There was no doubt in my mind that my brother would accept my Isabella, more than accept her, she would be a sister to him.

Emmett, havin' inherited the best part of both our parents, had a generous heart, and I was fair certain that he and Izzy would take to one another right away. It was a comfortin' thought that soon, I'd have all my family together in one place.

I was brought up short in my thinkin' though as I remembered Izzy's brothers. Not all my family would be together, for as sure as Emmett would be Izzy's brother, Theo and Henry was my brothers. Izzy worried daily 'bout what was happenin' back home, so after sendin' the wire to Emmett, I made sure to send one to Jake, inquirin' after any news of James Forrest, and about how Izzy's brothers was farin'.

I let them both know that I'd arrive in Monroe in about a week's time, and if they had anythin' to convey, they needed to send word to me there.

That done, Izzy and I made our way through the city. Even if I hadn't known what went on there durin' the war, the evidence was all around us.

Izzy was quiet for a long spell afore she spoke. "Were ya ever here durin' the war Ed?" I could tell by the look on her face that she was worried for my answer, almost as if recollectin' alone would work a hardship on me.

I shook my head. "Your Pa and Emmett was here, but it was afore I joined up. Most of my time was spent fightin' in Tennessee and Georgia." I answered her quietly as we approached the docks.

Izzy didn't ask any more questions. She could always sense when my mood warn't right for talkin'. Truth be told, I was right nervous about securin' passage across the river, and the reminders of a time I'd sooner forget was addin' to the anxious feelins inside.

The closer we got to the docks, the more a sense of dark forebodin' seemed to grip me. I suddenly felt the need of havin' Izzy close, so afore I could stop myself, I reached for her, pullin' her into my side. The warmth of her body pressed to mine soothed me like nothin' else. I could feel her eyes watchin' me as I kept mine straight ahead. It warn't long afore her arms were wrapped 'round my middle and we stayed that way 'til we reached the river.

I looked around in amazement. The docks was teemin' with life. Horses, wagons and folks goin' to and fro, some boardin' a ferry, others disembarkin' from one. I pulled the wagon up alongside two others I seen waitin'.

"Stay here Izzy. I gotta see the man 'bout payin' for our passage."

She nodded and smiled at me while pattin' Jack lightly on the head.

It didn't take long to find Mister Patterson and arrange for a place on the next ferry. When I turned back toward the wagon, I was feelin' a bit lighter knowin' we'd be shed of this city soon.

As I approached, I didn't see Izzy up on the seat, and that sinkin' feelin' was back. "Izzy!" I hollered in a panic when I didn't find her in the back either. "Izzy!" I called out toward the crowd hustlin' past me.

My chest started to tighten, and the first thing that crossed my mind was that James Forrest had found us. "Izzy!"

Just then, a feller in the wagon next to ours waved to me. "Is it your wife you're callin' for? From this wagon here?" He asked, gesturin' toward my wagon.

"Yes sir, have ya seen her?"

He nodded. "I did. She lit out of here chasin' after a dog."

_Jack_

"Did ya see what direction she went?" I asked, tryin' not to panic 'cause that warn't gonna help me find my wife.

"Yep, she runned in that direction." He pointed behind my wagon to the thickest part of the crowd.

"Do ya, I mean could ya…"

He smiled, seemin' to know what I was askin'. "Go on, I'll keep an eye on your wagon."

"Thank ya kindly."

I ran into the crowd callin' her name and Jack's too while I was about it. It warn't five minutes afore they both appeared in front of me. Izzy was out of breath and red-faced while totin' that rascal of a dog in her arms.

I took the dog from her and pulled her against me. "Isabella Cullen, I don't know whether to hug the stuffin' out of ya or turn ya over my knee."

She looked up at me with big eyes.

"When I say stay put, I mean it!" I fussed while wagglin' my finger in her face.

"I had to get Jack! He was chasin' after another dog…." She huffed out while I pulled her by the arm back to our wagon.

"I don't care what ya was tryin' to do. If'n he's stupid enough to run away, ya leave him be!"

"But it was my fault for not tyin' him up afore we got to the river," she was still arguin'.

I stopped then to help her into the wagon, makin' sure to tie Jack up this time afore takin' my seat beside her. I turned 'til I was facin' her. "Izzy, am I the man of the house?"

She frowned at me. "What are ya on about?"

"Just answer the question,  _wife_."

If looks coulda killed, I'd a been deader than John Brown with the way my wife was lookin' at me.

She folded her arms across her chest and glared at me steady. "Yes." It come out soundin' like the hiss of a snake.

"Yes," I repeated. "Then, since I am the man of the house, what I says is the  _law_ of the house. So if'n I tell ya to stay in the wagon, ya stay in the confounded wagon!"

Izzy blew out a breath and looked away, never speakin' another word to me 'til we was on the far side of the Mississippi River.


	44. Chapter 44

"Ya ever gonna speak to me again?" We was across the river and daylight was fadin' fast when I pulled off the trail to camp next to a nearby stream.

Izzy just give me a dirty look and turned her head away.

Once I stopped the wagon, we worked in silence. I unhitched the horses and seen to them while Izzy let Jack loose and began unpackin' her cookware.

I blew out a breath in frustration as I watched my stubborn wife go about her chores in complete silence. Well, she warn't actually  _silent_ 'cause, although she didn't say a word, she made sure to bang the pots loud enough so's they could probably hear us all the way back in Vicksburg.

I tried coaxin' her into talkin' while we ate, with no success. I was fair certain she wanted an apology from me, but that warn't gonna happen. She was in the wrong, and it was 'bout time I stood my ground and stopped givin' in.

When she was still ignorin' me after supper, my patience had reached its end, and I retrieved the bottle of whiskey from the wagon.

The first taste burned all the way down, afore that welcome warm feelin' started to settle over me. I looked up to find Izzy had stopped mendin' my shirt, and was glarin' at me.

I quirked an eyebrow, "Want a taste?" I teased with a grin as I held up the bottle.

She narrowed her eyes at me afore yankin' the bottle from my grasp and takin' a swig. I didn't even have time to warn her….

Next thing I knowed, she was doubled over, coughin' and sputterin'. I grabbed my canteen quick, and held it to her lips. When she finally stopped coughin' and was able to speak, she pushed me and the canteen away.

"Why didn't ya tell me it tasted like fire!"

"I didn't have a chance ya crazy woman!" I shouted back at her. "Why'd ya grab the bottle if'n ya never had spirits afore?"

"I don't know. I guess I was tired of men havin' all the fun!"

I tried and failed to swallow my smirk, "It looks as if you're havin' all kinds of fun now, Isabella."

The look she give me then made me feel real protective of my pecker all of a sudden. When she lunged toward me a minute later, my instinct for self-preservation kicked in and I immediately cupped myself with both hands.

For truth, Izzy was just goin' for the bottle, but my pecker was tellin' me to take no chances. When she seen what I'd done, she started in to laughin' at me afore takin' another swig of the whiskey.

I watched her grimace this time as she swallowed, but at least she didn't choke.

"This is worse tastin' than swamp water, not that I know what that tastes like," she said afore gigglin' the silliest girly giggle I ever heard come out of Izzy's mouth.

"Then why the hell ya drinkin' it?" I asked as I snatched the bottle back and took a swig.

"'Cause there's gotta be a reason that menfolk is so partial to it." She grabbed it back afore I could stop her and took another drink.

I didn't let her have no more after that, but it seemed that three swallows was just 'bout all Izzy needed to be feelin' no pain.

I took one more drink afore corkin' the bottle hard and settin' it on the ground beside me.

"Ya know Ed, I feel kinda happy right now," she telled me afore standin' up, movin' closer, and settin' down in my lap.

As soon as she wrapped her arms 'round my neck, my pecker comed to life. I reckon he warn't fearin' for his safety anymore. "I was powerful mad at ya." Izzy said as she stared into my eyes, "But I ain't feelin' so angry now."

I studied her for a while. "That's good." I reckon the whiskey was affectin' me as well, 'cause I felt the need to do somethin' I swore I wouldn't. "I'm sorry I hollered at ya."

Her smile lit up her face, "I cain't say I'm sorry I runned after Jack, but I am sorry I worried ya."

I nodded, understandin' her completely. "I know ya hollered 'cause ya love me, Ed."

"That's the God's honest truth, Izzy." I telled her afore buryin' my face into the side of her neck.

We sat quiet for a while afore she spoke again. "I reckon I understand now why ya like spirits."

"Why's that?" I pulled back to look at her and began to run my fingers up the buttons on the back of her dress, undoin' them one at a time.

"It may taste horrible, but it sure does warm ya all the way to your toes!"

I laughed as I slipped another button from the buttonhole.

She stared at me kinda dreamy eyed then, our noses almost touchin', "Whatcha doin' back there Ed?" Izzy asked in a whisper.

"Helpin' ya out of your dress." I whispered back afore touchin' my lips to hers.

"That's mighty considerate of ya." She said just as I slipped the last button free.

Izzy untied the sash afore standin' up and lettin' the dress fall off her. She stepped out of it and just stood there smilin' at me, so I patted my lap for her to sit down again.

She took her seat, this time she sat facin' me with her legs straddlin' mine, wearin' nothin' but her shift. It took everythin' in me not to release my strainin' manhood and enter her right there and then. But I kept remindin' myself that I was a gentleman.

"Ed," Izzy was givin' me them dreamy eyes again. "Do ya like my bosoms?"

My eyes opened wide in surprise. "Wha…?"

"I never brought this up afore, so maybe it's the whiskey makin' me bold, but" her voiced dropped to a whisper. "I recollect ya talkin' to that painted up lady, Miss Sally, outside the Tavern. The way she had her bosoms shoved in yer face, ya didn't seem to mind…"

That was the point where I choked and coughed on nothin' but air. Izzy patted my back 'til I recovered. I was hopin' she'd drop the subject, but I shoulda known better. Izzy was tenacious.

"I guess what I'm really askin' is if ya wish mine was bigger like Miss Sally's?"


	45. Chapter 45

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to JayNahNah for the words of wisdom left in a review for chapter 41…although I think it applies here as well: "If the wagon is a rockin', don't come a knockin'." Lol I really don't have anything to add to that…

"Now Izzy, why ya wanna bring Miss Sally up fer? That was afore I even met ya."

"Oh, I know." She said with a little shrug of her shoulders as her fingers commenced to playin' with my shirt collar.

"Please tell me ya ain't held it against me all this time 'cause my eyes strayed where they shouldn't a oughta been lookin'."

She shook her head. "No, I don't hold it against ya. I just wondered if there's things 'bout other women that ya like better'n me…" She was lookin' down, not meetin' my eyes.

I lifted her chin with my fingers 'til she was lookin' at me. "Izzy, I have to believe that it's the drink makin' ya talk this way. I admit that Miss Sally was anxious to get close to me; closer than I ever allowed, and more times than not, she'd flaunt her womanly assets. I'm ashamed to say that, once or twice, I warn't much of a gentleman, and I let my eyes wander. But I was never interested in doin' anythin' more than lookin'."

"I never wanted her. And now, since I found ya, Izzy, I don't  _see_ no one else. There is  _nothin'_ Miss Sally or any other woman could possibly possess which could come close to what I've got right here in my arms. Ain't no one sweeter or more beautiful than the gal I married."

"You're perfection in every way to me, and I desire ya more than a sane man probably should. I cain't help myself, I want ya every wakin' moment, and even in my sleep I'm drawn to ya." I stroked her cheek with my hand, "Ya own my heart pretty girl, and I ask ya to forgive me for not tellin' ya often enough…"

She was just starin' at me with a flushed face, her lips parted in surprise, her chest heavin' from the effort of her breathin'.

"Oh Ed," She was tryin' to catch her breath as she panted out the words, "I reckon ya better take me to bed or else I'm gonna strip nekked right here, and maybe give Jack a fright." Next thing I knowed, her lips was on mine in a fierce kiss. As soon as I felt her tongue in my mouth, I stood.

Izzy clung to me like a bear cub, never releasin' me from the kiss, as I carried her to the wagon.

I barely had her laid down on the mattress afore she was pullin' off her shift. I started workin' on my shirt so's I could catch up and, in my haste, may have pulled off a button or two.

"Izzy girl, what's got into ya?" I asked against her mouth, once we was both divested of our clothes. She was a wildcat as she pulled me to her, mind you, I warn't complainin'.

She pulled back just long enough to answer. "Those words ya said was sweeter to my ears than Shakespeare, Ed. Knowin' that no other woman could turn your head," She closed her eyes and huffed out a breath, "I never thought I could be so  _desirable_ to a man… it's just so, unexpected."

She looked up at me and wrapped her arms 'round me so's I could feel her fingernails pressed into my back. "Oh Ed, just join with me now afore I explode!"

As much as I wanted to, I warn't about to just 'get down to business' as it were. I needed to slow things down a bit, for her sake. I kissed her slow, with everythin' that was in me, and as I did, I felt her begin to relax. Her heart was still beatin' wildly, but she stopped the frantic pushin' and pullin' of her limbs as she let me take control.

I worshipped her then with my lips and tasted her soft skin with my tongue, startin' with her own sweet lips afore workin' my way down her body. Her neck, her shoulders, her breasts, and still lower as I kissed her stomach. Izzy's body tensed as I kissed lower still, and when I reached the place of her womanhood her legs started to twitch. We'd been married a month, but I'd never kissed or tasted her there afore. It was somethin' I'd heard the fellers talk 'bout once or twice and, at the time, I could never imagine wantin' to do that.

Of course that was afore I'd met Izzy…

But, as much as I wanted her that way, I was always hesitant as to her reaction.

"Relax beautiful, I only aim to make ya feel good," I whispered against her flesh afore swipin' between the folds with my tongue. If I hadn't a been so wrought up, I'd a laughed at the little squeak that come out of her then. I touched her with my tongue once more, afore crawlin' up her body and kissin' her lips. "I ain't surprised that you're sweet  _everywhere._ " I telled her with a smile, "Ya are the most desirable woman in all the world to me," I whispered afore pressin' into her warm heat.

Izzy let out a little sigh of contentment now that we was finally joined and we started to move together. "I find ya most desirable as well, Ed," she whispered against my cheek as I thrust into her. "You're good, and kind" she lifted her hips to meet me, "and the most handsome man I ever laid eyes on. Sometimes, I think I'm gonna wake up and this will all have been just a dream."

I shook my head as I continued to make love to my wife. "No dream darlin'. We belong together."

And so the dance continued, until we found our release.

We fell asleep in each other's arms both content in the knowledge that, no matter what tomorrow may bring, we could face anythin' as long as we faced it together.


	46. Chapter 46

" _Let us pause in life's pleasures and count its many tears,  
While we all sup sorrow with the poor;  
There's a song that will linger forever in our ears;  
Oh hard times come again no more."_

I could hear Izzy singin' as I returned from huntin' early the next mornin'. The sound of her sweet voice brought back memories of when I was a child, and my Ma would sing that same song.

" _Tis the song, the sigh of the weary,  
Hard Times, hard times, come again no more  
Many days you have lingered around my cabin door;  
Oh hard times come again no more."_

I stood a ways off, just watchin' and listenin'. In some ways, Izzy put me in mind of my Ma. Her happy nature tended to lift the spirits of everyone around, just like Ma's did.

" _While we seek mirth and beauty and music light and gay,  
There are frail forms fainting at the door;  
Though their voices are silent, their pleading looks will say  
Oh hard times come again no more."_

At that moment, she lifted her head from her work and seen me standin' there. A pretty smile lit up her face at the sight of me and my heart felt near to overflowin' with the knowledge that I could be responsible for that sort of reaction.

Despite all the sins of my past, the Lord had seen fit to bless me with much more than I could ever deserve.

I finally understood the way my brother felt after meetin' Rosa. I thought back to the day he sat at our table and telled me and Pa flat out that he was fair certain that she'd been sent to him from heaven above, and he was gonna do whatever was necessary to make that gal his wife.

At the time, I considered that he was possibly a little tetched in the head. But now… now I was convinced that my brother was one of the smartest fellers I'd ever knowed.

Izzy practically skipped over to where I was standin' and pushed up on her tiptoes to give me a kiss. "I made biscuits. Ya go ahead and eat, and I'll dress the game."

We was gonna get a late start this mornin' but I didn't mind it. Texas would still be waitin' for us when we got there.

The week that followed was a rainy one, but pleasant enough. Even though it would be quite a while afore we left Louisiana, Izzy's excitement seemed to be growin' the closer we got to Texas. I didn't have the heart to tell her that we still had almost two months of travel ahead of us.

Monroe was a busy place. I'd heard tell there was some unrest in Louisiana due to the new laws put in place by the Yankee government. It appeared to me that some folks on both sides was still fightin' a war.

I reckon there were those that would be just as happy to fight that war 'til the day they died. That warn't for me. That damn war had taken enough, two of my best friends; part of my hand, and at times, pert near most of my sanity.

"Izzy, ya can start gatherin' the supplies we need," I telled her as I hitched the wagon a short ways from the mercantile. "I have some business at the telegraph office."

She nodded and smiled afore headin' inside the store.

I was glad to find not just a wire from my brother, but one from Jake as well. They were both short and got right to the point.

_**Brother,** _

_**Thankful you are getting closer. More surprised than I can say at your news, but I must tell you that I am very happy for you, as I know our dear parents would be.** _

_**Anxiously awaiting your next wire, and the day when I see you again.** _

_**-Emmett Cullen** _

I smiled at the amount of emotion Emmett could express in so short a message. It wouldn't surprise me if I discovered he'd shed a tear or two at the mention of our parents. Pa's passin' was still raw, and, even though Emmett was livin' all the way in Texas, the grief was just as strong for him as it was for me.

I opened Jakes message then.

_**Ed,** _

_**Wish I had good news to send, but Forrest and his companion are still on the loose. The lawmen can't find a trace of them outside Mississippi. It's like they vanished.** _

_**Tell Izzy not to worry about her brothers. Ma has taken them both under her wing, making sure they're cared for, and I'll be staying with them on their farm until the wedding. Forrest would be a fool to come close.** _

_**There is a lot more been discovered about him that you need to know, so I will write a longer correspondence, and send it in care of the post office in Shreveport.** _

_**Send word when you can.** _

_**-Jake** _

The news certainly didn't put me at ease, but I did feel a might better knowin' that Jake and his family were lookin' after Izzy's brothers.

Jake's message give me a cold chill as I wondered what else was in Forrest's past.

I sent quick wires to both Jake and Emmett, mostly just lettin' them know I'd gotten their messages, afore headin' back out to find Izzy. Jake's news made me nervously check the faces of those I passed, and I warn't gonna settle 'til I had my arms 'round my wife.

Someday, I knowed there'd come a time when she'd stop surprisin' me, but that day had yet to arrive. As I approached the wagon, I could see Izzy standin' beside it talkin' to three little ragamuffin children. The nearer I got, I was able to see that she was feedin' them.

"What's all this?" I asked as I come up beside her.

"They's waitin' for their Pap, they ain't been in town long. He's lookin' for work." She turned to me then, and spoke in a whisper. "Their Mam passed on and I don't know when's the last time they ate a decent meal, Ed. I couldn't go on my way without helpin' 'em."

I looked at the children as they ate our biscuits and salted pork. "It's the same all over the South Izzy, ya cain't save everyone." I telled her in a whisper.

"But I can do what I'm able. I believe the good Lord wouldn't have let me see these children if'n I warn't meant to help 'em."

"By givin' away our food…"

"The Lord will provide, Ed. I reckon if'n we provide for these here, He'll be sure to provide for us."

I'd suspected as much, but now I was fair certain. Izzy was too good for the likes of me.

I pulled her to me then, not carin' who was lookin'. "I reckon He already provided for me. Sent me an angel to remind me of the right path, 'cause I tend to get a little lost on my own."

"Nonsense, Mister Cullen, I ain't no angel." She said with a giggle.

"Ya are in my eyes, and right now, I'm gonna kiss my angel in front of the whole town."

"Ed!" She didn't get another word out afore I had my lips pressed to hers. I felt her relax against me, but didn't release her 'til I heared the children laughin'.

I looked over to see all three of them smilin' as they happily ate their biscuits.

Izzy seemed to make it her chore to see to it that those children were settled afore we could go on our way. Their Pa was mighty surprised, and fair grateful to my wife for what she'd done when he come back, smilin' from ear to ear with news of a new job at the livery stable.

When we finally left, we were lighter every biscuit in the larder, a jar of apple butter I'd bought Izzy as a treat in Vicksburg, and a goodly amount of the salted pork. She was content knowin' that their Pa had a job and seemed to love them young'uns enough to do right by 'em.

I reckon I'd just be huntin' a bit more often.


	47. Chapter 47

It was more than a week since we'd left Monroe, and we was just comin' up on the outskirts of Shreveport, so I decided to pull off the road and make camp by the river.

It was one of those days where I felt weary of travellin'; although, I knowed in my heart that I was better disposed to long journeys than some, 'cause of the time spent in the war.

Almost as if she could hear my musin's, Izzy spoke. "I cain't believe your brother travelled all this way by hisself."

I smiled. "He made that journey in less than a month."

Izzy's eyes grew wide in surprise. "What?"

I chuckled at her reaction. "He didn't carry nothin' except what would fit in his saddlebags. He warn't totin' furniture and whatnot."

"Oh." Izzy thought 'bout that afore speakin' again. "How well do ya know Rosa?" She looked a might nervous, and I wondered if she was scared of meetin' Emmett and his wife. "And how did she end up in Texas if'n her Grandma lives in Tennessee?"

She was in an excitable mood, and the questions was comin' faster than I could answer.

"What's she look like? Is she very pretty?"

"Hold on there Missus," I said in a teasin' tone, "Just give me a chance, and I'll settle your curious mind."

She giggled, the sound of it goin' straight to my heart, like always. I was quiet for a time, as I tried to recall everythin' Emmett had telled me.

"Rosa's Pa was from back home in Robertson County, and it was  _his_  Ma that Rosa took care of durin' the war." I glanced at Izzy to find her listenin' closely. "Rosa's Pa was in the army. This was way back afore the war, maybe close to thirty years ago now."

"For a time, he was sent to Louisiana, and that's where he met Rosa's mother. Her folks was from the Canary Islands but moved here years and years afore."

Izzy looked confused. "Where's that?"

"I asked Emmett the same question. It's more southern than Spain, but I reckon it's a part of it."

Izzy's eyes was wide now with curiosity. "So Rosa's Spanish?"

I grinned. " _She_ would say that her Ma's an  _islander._  She's right insistent 'bout it. It was all confusin' to me, so I didn't ask no more questions." I said with a shake of my head.

"Ya still didn't say how she ended up in Texas?"

"The army." I give my shoulders a shrug. "Her Pa got sent there afore Rosa was born. Been there ever since."

"So, is she pretty?"

I nodded, keepin' my eyes on the trail. "She is. The first time I seen her, with her long dark hair and bright blue eyes, I reckoned she had to be the prettiest gal I ever laid eyes on," I turned to look at my wife, a hurt expression startin' to form on her face, "but that was afore I met ya." I telled her with a smile and a wink.

She giggled again and smacked my arm lightly. "Ya's quite a charmer Mister Cullen."

"You're the only one I ever care to charm, Missus Cullen."

_***WYiMA***_

Campin' by the river afforded us the chance to have fish for breakfast. It was a welcome change.

I discovered that Izzy was still full of questions as we loaded up the wagon to leave. "Ed, do ya think life in Texas is gonna be  _very_ different from the way life was back home?"

"I reckon it will be. Emmett says it is hotter'n home and drier. Not as many trees he says. But there's a fair amount of people settlin' around there. The army's buildin' a fort and the town's growin' because of it."

Izzy got a sad, lost look in her eyes as I spoke. "What's ailin' ya darlin'?" I asked as I put my hand on her shoulder.

"Everythin' has changed so fast…" She took a breath, "For years and years, everythin' in my life was exactly the same, then the war happened, and nothin' was the same…" She looked up at me then.

"Are ya homesick?"

"I know I'm supposed to be but…" she give me a wistful smile. "I cain't be homesick when I'm with ya, Ed. You're my home." She said afore wrappin' her arms around me and lookin' up at my face.

"I miss my brothers, and I know I will 'til the day comes, Lord willin', that I see them again. I miss my Mam and Pap, but that's somethin' I'll carry with me forever. But I don't miss Tennessee, not since I married ya. I admit to bein' frightened of startin' life in this new place, but I know we'll make our way. I reckon it ain't in either of us to fail."

"Ya are a marvel," I telled her afore kissin' her lips.

***WYiMA***

Shreveport was big and sprawlin' and busy as all get out. It was so busy in fact, that I didn't feel right lettin' Izzy go anywhere alone, so I had her wait in the wagon with Jack, down the street while I visited the telegraph office. Afterwards, I planned for us to go together to gather supplies.

I sent a message to Emmett, lettin' him know we'd made it to Shreveport, and then collected the letter from Jacob that was waitin' for me.

I opened it, intendin' to give it a quick look-see, and read it closer later, but the first line grabbed my attention and held it.


	48. Chapter 48

I opened it, intendin' to give it a quick look-see, and read it closer later, but the first line grabbed my attention and held it.

_**Ed,** _

_**I surely hope this letter makes it to Shreveport before you do, because we found out some mighty disturbing news about James Forrest since I wired you last.** _

_**He's a dangerous man, Ed. More dangerous than we feared.** _

_**Thanks to the Sheriff here alerting the surrounding counties, Cyrus, the feller that was with Forrest, has been captured.** _

_**He was all too willing to give up everything he knew of Forrest, and made it clear that** _ **James** _**was the one to kill Izzy's uncle. I doubt it will save Cyrus from hanging as an accomplice, but that's for the judge to decide.** _

_**The tale he told was not a pretty one, and it made my blood run cold to hear some parts of it. I'll give it to you as it was given to me.** _

_**Forrest's name is really Jahu Forrest. He's from North Carolina, and fought for the South during the war, that was until him and one of his brothers, Ezekiel, deserted and joined up with the Yankees. They didn't become no regular Yankee troops though. The Forrest brothers and a few other fellers led raids on Southern towns, stealing livestock and goods, leaving their own people to starve.** _

_**At one point, Ezekiel and Jahu deserted the Yankees as well. Ezekiel was caught by Confederate Troops while trying to sneak home, and even though Jahu had been traveling with him, he somehow avoided capture.** _

_**A small detail of soldiers were dispatched to transport Ezekiel from North Carolina to his regiment, which was camped outside of Petersburg at the time.** _

_**Less than a day after arriving, Ezekiel was shot for desertion.** _

_**Jahu never dared show his face in North Carolina again, despite the fact that he'd left a wife and child behind. Cyrus said Forrest didn't care about his wife anyhow, and she's been living these past two years with the belief that he was executed along with his brother.** _

_**That no count Forrest never intended to get a divorce Ed, and planned to marry Izzy whether it was legal or not.** _

I had to stop readin' for a minute to calm myself. Just the thought of that no good bastard usin' Izzy in such a manner made me want to find him and kill him slow and painful. I squeezed my eyes shut and took a breath afore continuin'.

_**He never got in trouble for deserting the Yankees, and right after the war, Forrest changed his first name to James and decided he'd try his luck in Tennessee.** _

_**Within a month of arriving here, he was arrested in Sumner County for horse thieving, and sent to prison for a year.** _

_**While there, he met up with a fellow prisoner named Marcus Hawkins. You probably recognize the name, since that feller was in your regiment. He sounds like a regular no good, just the type that Forrest would make friends with.** _

I remembered Marcus. He warn't the kind of feller I wanted anythin' to do with.

I admit that I had been forced to kill many a man on the field of battle, but in my heart and soul I regretted every one. Marcus was vicious and cruel, seemin' to delight in the killin'.

_**Over time, James learned that Marcus was one of the men who transported his brother to Petersburg, and ultimately to his hanging. Marcus, not realizing that he was talking to the man's own brother, laughed about how the prisoner begged and cried for them to let him go, shedding tears like a woman.** _

_**Now, James Forrest may not care for another soul in this world, but the man loved his brother.** _

_**The words he heard from Marcus's mouth set off a burning hatred, hotter than hellfire, and from what Cyrus told us, James spent the rest of his time in prison plotting his revenge against those three men.** _

_**Soon after he was released, he found Marcus who'd gotten out some time before him, and tortured that man until he died. I'll spare you the details until the next time I see you face to face.** _

_**If you don't remember the part I'm fixing to tell you now, you may want to hold onto your hat.** _

_**The other two fellers in that detail that transported Forrest's brother were John Stokes and Charles Swan.** _

_**You'll remember we heard tell of John Stokes found drowned in the creek months ago. Doc said he must have fallen and hit his head just before hitting the water. Cyrus says that it was Forrest that did it.** _

I started to feel a panic inside as I tried to recall how Izzy had said her Pa died. If'n he was really killed by Forrest, I didn't know how I was gonna tell her…

_**Forrest never had a chance to kill Charlie Swan as the man was already dead before he got to Robertson County. So instead, he was planning on taking his anger out on Izzy.** _

_**Thank the good Lord she stowed away in your wagon Ed. If she had married Forrest, I don't believe she'd be living now.** _

I could feel my heart beatin' wild in my chest and the sweat beadin' on my brow at his words.

_**Cyrus is convinced that Forrest is crazy. He knew that he was going to kill him for knowing too much, so he ran away. He says he'd rather take his chances with the judge than with James Forrest.** _

_**He also says that Forrest is still after Izzy.** _

_**Ed, I don't want you to worry your mind about her brothers, they are well protected. It's your wife and you that I'm concerned for. I'm sending a letter to your brother immediately after sending this one, letting him know everything.** _

_**Take extra care, my friend, and keep Izzy close beside you.** _

_**Jacob Black** _

The panic that set in that time warn't for fear of tellin' Izzy somethin' that might upset her. The panic I was feelin' was over the fact that I'd left my wife alone, not knowin' how great the danger to her truly was.

I tore out the door like a man afire and ran toward our wagon. I could hear Jack barkin' his fool head off afore I could see him. When I got close enough, all I could see was him straining at the rope 'round his neck.

"Izzy!" I called, half expectin' her to poke her head out of the wagon and smile at me. When I reached the wagon, I jumped up on it and practically dove inside. Izzy was nowhere to be found. "Izzy!" I called, hopin' to hear her answerin' call. I stood and looked in all directions at the folks millin' about. "Izzy!"

She was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of the incidents in Forrest's past were taken from the real-life account of a distant relative of my hubs. To be fair, hubs is descended from several Revolutionary and Civil War heroes…but this fellow is not to be discounted. As far as I know he wasn't a murderer, but he was a bigamist, a horse thief, a deserter, his brother was caught and executed for desertion, and he raided the farms of his own neighbors (in North Carolina) for the Union Army, and then hid in Tennessee for the rest of his life. Jerk.
> 
> Just goes to show that NONE of us can help who we're related to. Lol.
> 
> By the way, the South executed for desertion, but the North did not.


	49. Chapter 49

I turned away from the wagon and runned straight to the Mercantile, hopin' against hope that I'd find Izzy inside, all the words from Jake's letter still runnin' through my head.

' _ **So instead, he was planning on taking his anger out on Izzy…'**_

I prayed silently to the good Lord that she'd been her willful self and gone against what I telled her to do. Nothin' would have made me happier than to find her inside that store, eyein' the sweets she had a hankerin' for.

She always tried to stop me from buyin' 'em for her, not wantin' to waste the money, but I couldn't resist the happy smile it put on her face when I would pull a candy stick from my pocket and place it in her hand.

If'n she was inside that store, I'd be so happy that I'd buy her a whole jar of candy….

But my hopes turned to dust soon as I stepped across the threshold and discovered not a soul inside exceptin' the proprietor and myself. He was a tall, stern lookin' feller, but as soon as he seen the panic I was in, his expression turned to one of concern.

I explained as quickly as I could 'bout my wife and he assured that he hadn't seen her. That left me with nothin' to do 'exceptin' to set out to look for her, but where to start?

I could hear Jack still barkin' as I left the store, that storekeeper followin' me with an offer to help, all the while hollerin' for his sons to come. I couldn't stop to listen…

As soon as I seen Jack, still strainin' at the rope, the thought hit me like a bolt of lightnin'…

_Jack was a witness to whatever happened to Izzy..._

Sure as shootin' that dog loved Izzy with everythin' in him. If he couldn't find her, warn't no one on this earth who could. My hands was shakin' as I untied the rope and spoke to that dog more serious than ever afore. "Jack boy, if'n ya know where he took her and show me, you'll be gettin' the best cut of meat at supper from here on out…" I tried to keep from breakin' down as I said the words.

As soon as the rope fell away from him, Jack took off out of that wagon and across the main street like a shot. I grabbed my rifle afore tearin' out after him.

My heart was in my throat as I forced myself not to consider what that bastard mayhap be puttin' my Izzy through at that very moment. The fact that Jack was sure of his way give me hope, and I clung to that hope with everythin' in me as we travelled through the busy streets.

I couldn't stop thinkin' 'bout Izzy and how scared she must be…

_I'm comin' sweet girl. Have faith._

In one way, I was glad she didn't know the whole truth 'bout Forrest, but I reckon she knowed enough.

If Forrest hurt her, I was gonna hurt him worse.

If he killed…

No, I couldn't think on it.

As I recollected all the bad he'd done, I knowed he warn't gonna let Izzy go with less than he'd done to her Uncle.

My stomach churned at the thought, and I fought against the urge to lean over and empty its contents on the side of the street. I had to keep goin' and followin' Jack, it was the best hope of findin' my girl.

What I did know, for sure and for certain was that, when I caught up with him, James Forrest warn't gonna live to see the sunrise of another day.


	50. Chapter 50

I followed Jack like my life depended on it. Well, I reckon it did 'cause I couldn't imagine no sort of life without Izzy. In the short time I'd known her, she'd come to mean everythin' to me.

When we reached the railroad station, Jack suddenly stopped runnin' and searched around on the ground a bit. It was a right busy place with folks comin' and goin' and I started into panickin', thinkin' that Jack had lost Izzy's scent, and this would be the end of the line for us.

I crouched down beside him and spoke in a pleadin' tone. "Come on boy, I know ya can find her." Jack seemed to sniff the air then. I couldn't rightly tell if he actually sensed somethin' or if it was a sound he took off after when he bolted past the depot toward the rail yard out back, where a couple rows of empty freight cars sat waitin'on the side tracks.

He didn't stop runnin' 'til we reached the last line of cars and then started in to whimperin' when he found somethin' lying' on the ground there. As soon as I seen up close what had got his attention, my heart jumped into my throat, recognizin' it to be the hair ribbon Izzy was wearin' just afore I left her.

I could've cried for joy knowin' we was on the right track, but there warn't no joy in me; not 'til I had her safe in my arms. I crouched down by Jack again as I had somethin' needed sayin', and I prayed for him to understand me, just this once.

"Boy," I whispered, "I'm suspectin' that our girl's in one of these here cars," I telled him as I pointed to them. "Jack, ya gotta try your best to be quiet, 'cause if'n he hears us comin' I'm afeared of what he'll do to Izzy."

That dog looked me in the eye, and I swear I seen understandin' there. He give a little huff as if to say 'I heared ya Ed'.

I surveyed the line of cars, some of 'em had their doors flung wide open, so me and Jack checked them first. Just as I suspected, they were empty. That left two cars with their doors shut tight. I pressed my ear against the side of the first one, but it was as silent as the grave inside. However, when I tried to move on to the next car, Jack refused to follow me. It was only then that I noticed how he was standin', still as stone, and starin' at that door.

My stomach twisted as I walked back over to him. It was too quiet in that car, and I was afeared for what I was gonna find inside as I reached to slide open the door with a tremblin' hand.


	51. Chapter 51

I stood by that freight car, pistol drawn, watchin' my own hand fixin' to slide the door open. Suddenly, the memory of my Pa's voice come unbidden to my mind.

" _Son, afore ya leave, I want ya to know that I'm proud of ya, and I would feel that way whether or not ya was goin' off to war. You're a good man, same as your brother."_

I recollected how he stood beside the old apple tree and pulled his kerchief from his pocket to wipe his brow afore continuin'.

" _Noble, that's what ya are, like lions, brave and proud. The problem is that ya view the rest of the world as bein' the same way."_

He put his hand on my shoulder,

" _I feel I've wronged ya somehow by keepin' ya so close to home. Emmett, not so much, but you Ed…"_

He shook his head as he looked down at the ground.

" _I reckon it was on account of losin' your Ma that I worried more than was natural for my children, and now you're bein' throw into the worst of it, and know nothin' 'bout what mayhap come against ya."_

He looked me in the eye then and spoke low and serious.

" _I'm fearful for ya son, 'cause bein' the way ya are, ya ain't suited to fight against them that ain't like ya. Men that ain't noble, men that ain't never gonna do somethin' just 'cause it's the right thing to do."_

" _I'm speakin' of the worst kind of men, Ed. They take pleasure in another man's pain. You're gonna meet up with them on both sides of this war. Whereas good men mayhap be like lions, these other fellers they's more like snakes. They's the kind ya gotta kill or be killed by 'em. But it ain't easy, 'cause to win against 'em, ya gotta think like 'em."_

I slowly drew my hand back from that door as the memory of that talk with my Pa played on in my mind…

" _A snake lies in wait, coiled, ready to strike, and never usually makes a sound 'til it's too late."_

I leaned my ear against that door again and put all my concentration into listenin' for any sound comin' from inside. I even stopped breathin' for a time…

What I heard then, liked to turn the blood to ice in my veins. There warn't no mistakin' the sound of someone whimperin', and I knowed in my heart it was my Izzy. I warn't about to give myself time to revel in the knowledge that she still drew breath, 'cause at that moment I was a man driven by only one desire: the desire to kill the sumbitch what was makin' her cry.

Thinkin' back on my Pa's words made me suspect that Forrest knowed full well that I'd be comin' for him, mayhap he even  _lured_ me here, and would be lyin' in wait in order to put a bullet in my head.

I moved away from the door, slow and quiet, and made my way around to the other side of the car. Soon as I turned the corner, I could see that the door on this side had been slid open a few inches; the bastard more 'n likely usin' the openin' for light to see by.

I come at that openin' the same way I would an enemy soldier durin' the war, careful and quiet. When I got close enough to peer inside, my eyes was immediately drawn to where the light was shinin' across somethin' lyin' in the middle of the floor.

She was on her side, facin' away from me, her hands tied behind her back, and her body shakin' from her sobs. I had to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from cryin' out.

Across from where I stood, just as I had suspected, was James Forrest, gun drawn, watchin' that other door like a hawk. I pulled the hammer back on my revolver, and pulled the trigger.


	52. Chapter 52

Izzy screamed at the sound of my gun goin' off, and Forrest turned to look at me, the surprised expression on his face almost comical, afore he slumped to the floor in a heap.

Seemed like my bullet had hit its mark.

I flung that door open wide afore scramblin' inside the train car and over to where Izzy was now lyin' on her back starin' at me with wide frightened eyes. She was gagged, and I swallowed hard at the sight of her bloodied face. The bastard had torn open the front of her dress, as well, but not the shift that was underneath. I didn't know quite what to make of that…

I knowed I shoulda' checked on Forrest first, but nothin' could keep me from Izzy.

I laid one hand against her cheek as I pulled the gag away with the other. "Darlin', I got ya." I telled her afore leanin' down to gently kiss her forehead.

"Ed," she spoke in a raspy voice, her lip was cut and swollen, but the fear in her eyes was gone.

"Let me get these ropes off ya," I said afore rollin' her carefully back to her side. I'd just gotten the last of the knots undone when Izzy yelled. "Ed, look out."

I seen movement out of the corner of my eye, and realized that Forrest warn't dead. I went to grab for my pistol as I seen him reachin' for his gun where it had fallen beside him.

Afore I had a chance to shoot him again, however, Jack come flyin' out of nowhere and tore into the bastard.

I warn't sure how he done it, but considerin' how high off the ground that doorway was situated, Jack must've taken a mighty leap to make it through.

Today, me and him were of the same mind: warn't nothin' gonna keep us from Izzy.

As soon as I was certain that Forrest warn't goin' for his gun again, I pulled Jack off him. "Stop boy," I said as I kicked Forrest's gun away.

Suddenly, we was surrounded by the sound of voices. The other door to the freight car slid open wide, and several men bounded inside, guns drawn. I held my hands up in surrender.

"Sheriff, that's the feller whose wife was kidnapped," I turned to look at who was speakin' and recognized the proprietor of the store.

"That true?" I turned to find the sheriff holdin' a gun aimed at my chest.

I nodded my head, "Yes sir, that's the feller there what took her. Can I please see to my wife." My voice broke with emotion then, and I swallowed back the lump in my throat, knowin' how badly Izzy needed me.

He glanced down to where she was lyin' on the floor, all curled up on her side and sobbin'. The Sheriff give me a look of pity and nodded afore lowerin' his gun.

I immediately dropped to the floor and pulled Izzy against me where she continued to cry into my shirt.

"Sherriff," one of the men surroundin' Forrest called, "this here feller's dead."

His words barely registered in my mind.

"Go fetch Doc Miller," the Sheriff said in answer.

"Didn't ya hear me? The feller's dead. Doc ain't gonna help him now." The same voice answered.

"Not for the dead man, ya idiot; for the lady."

I didn't look up or pay no heed to the goin's on around me after that.

None of it mattered.

My girl was hurtin', so I held her close and rocked her like a babe; Jack sittin' right beside us all the while.


	53. Chapter 53

When the doctor arrived, he conferred with the Sheriff afore examinin' Forrest's body. "Well, the cause of death is the bullet wound to the chest, but his arm and shoulder got mauled pretty good by the dog." I heared him say.

So it was for certain that I'd killed a man. It warn't the first time, but it was the first time I actually took joy in the killin'. God forgive me, but it was the truth.

The doctor approached us then. "Mister, I'm thinkin' it may be better if you take your Missus outside," he telled me in a quiet tone.

Of course he was right. Here I was, holdin' my wife while the man who tried to kill her lay in a pool of his own blood not ten feet away.

I kissed her hair afore standin' with her in my arms. Soon as I had Izzy outside, the doctor started askin' her questions. "Missus….?" he give me a questionin' look.

"Cullen," I said in answer.

"Missus Cullen if you're agreeable, I'd like you to come back to my office for a proper examination." Even though the doctor had a soothin' voice, I felt Izzy tense in my arms. "The cuts on your face need attention, and maybe we can talk a little bit about what happened to you."

Izzy turned her face into my shirt and shook her head.

"Darlin' let the doctor make sure you're alright," I asked in a pleadin' tone.

"I'm fine," she lied afore snifflin' loudly into my shirt.

In the end, she agreed to visit the doctor's office as long as I promised to stay with her every minute.

One of the Sheriff's men tagged along, 'cause I was due for questionin' as soon as Izzy got through with the doctor.

That doc had a way of convincin' folks to talk 'cause afore I knowed it, Izzy was spillin' the details of her ordeal.

"He come up to the wagon unexpected," she said, snifflin' again as she spoke. "Jack liked to have strangled himself on that rope tryin' to get to him.  _Forrest,_ " the hatred she felt showin' on her face, "had a gun pointed at Jack's head and telled me that if I didn't go with him and be quiet about it, he'd shoot Jack dead." The tears started flowin' again, so I rubbed her back in a soothin' fashion.

She give me a sad look. "I'm sorry Ed, but I just couldn't let him do it."

I didn't know what to say. I surely didn't want to lose Jack but today, we'd come close to all of us dyin'.

Izzy turned back to the doc. "He kept the gun against my side, hidden under his coat, and grabbed my arm so hard while we walked that it went kinda numb after a spell." Her hand was tremblin' as she gripped mine. "He telled me that if I runned away or fought against him, he'd go back to the wagon and after killin' Jack, he'd make sure to kill ya as well, Ed."

I stopped rubbin' her back and wrapped my arm around her shoulders afore kissin' the top of her head. "It's alright darlin'. I've got ya now. He ain't never gonna hurt no one else ever again."

Izzy took a deep breath. "He didn't get real violent 'til he had me inside that freight car. He was shoutin' things I didn't rightly understand about my Pap," Izzy shook her head in bewilderment and I knowed I was gonna have to tell her 'bout Jake's letter.

But not tonight.

"And 'bout gettin' his vengeance. He punched and kicked me, and when I fought back, that's when he started hittin' my face. My strugglin' is what got my dress ripped…"

The doctor nodded, and I wanted to kill James Forrest all over again, only this time I wanted to do it slow, and I wanted to watch his face as he knowed his end was comin' by my hands…


	54. Chapter 54

Listenin' to Izzy's account of what she'd suffered at the hands of James Forrest was almost more than I could bear. I swallowed hard as I listened, and buried my feelin's deep afore she was aware. The last thing she needed was to be worryin' 'bout me.

Even though Izzy wouldn't remove her tattered dress, she did let the Doc examine her through her clothes, after which he determined that nothin' appeared to be broken. When he was finished, he and I stepped into the outer office while Izzy changed into her red dress. It was the only one she owned now that warn't tainted by the memory of James Forrest.

Afore I left the room, she give me a look so sad and forlorn, that I almost stayed there with her, but there was somethin' needed doin', and it was better if Izzy didn't know about it just yet.

I wrote a brief letter and handed it and the letter sent by Jake, to the Deputy waitin' there. "I need ya to kindly give these to the Sheriff. My wife ain't in any condition to speak with him today, but these two letters will explain more than enough of what he needs to know 'til we come see him tomorrow."

After Doctor Miller explained to the feller that what Izzy needed most was rest, he seemed satisfied that we warn't gonna skip town.

After leavin' the horses and wagon in the care of the livery stable, I secured us a room at a boardin' house not far from there. The place was run by a pleasant old widow lady named Missus Duval.

It was a sore trial watchin' Izzy say goodbye to Jack for the night, even though he was only gonna be as far as the back yard. As we turned to go inside, I felt as if I was leavin' a little part of me out there, so I could only imagine how hard it was for Izzy.

"Come on sweet girl," I telled her, "Ya's just about dead on your feet."

It was early evenin' when we arrived at our room, and Missus Duval, gentle lady that she was, had a table with our supper laid out, waitin' for us there.

Even though we hadn't eaten since early mornin', Izzy barely touched her food.

"Ain't ya hungry darlin'?" I asked as I reached over and patted her knee. She winced a little at the touch and I coulda kicked myself as I yanked my hand away. "Izzy, I'm sorry. I didn't realize…"

"No," she said in an urgent tone as she grasped my hand and held it in hers. "I'm just a little sore. I reckon it will feel even worse come tomorrow." She tried to smile, "My lip hurts, and my cheek; well, it's makin' it kinda hard to eat."

I closed my eyes and took in a deep breath. Forrest's face filled my mind, and I fought against the white hot hate that was workin' to consume me. The bastard may have been gone, but the damage he'd done would be around for days, if not longer, servin' as a reminder.

Watchin' Izzy struggle to eat caused a knot to twist in my own stomach. I was thankful when she had no trouble finishin' the bread puddin' at least.

After supper, or what there was of it, the tub I'd ordered for Izzy's bath arrived, along with Missus Duval and her granddaughter bearin' ewers of hot and cold water. She begged a word in private with my wife and, even though I was hesitant to leave her, Izzy signaled that she would be fine.

I helped carry the dinner dishes downstairs, and Jack ended up feastin' like a king on our scraps. After makin' sure he was set for the night, I made my way back upstairs.

When I arrived, I found Missus Duval and Izzy chatterin' away like they was old friends. When she seen me, Missus Duval give me a smile and hugged Izzy carefully, afore clearin' out of the room.

"What was that about?" I asked my wife.

Izzy smiled, even though it appeared to pain her, "She's real sweet Ed. She give me some clothes." Izzy's eyes teared up, "She kind of put me in mind of my Mam, I hate to ponder what  _she_ would have made of today…" She said in a whisper as a tear escaped her eye.

I quickly crossed the room 'til I was kneelin' in front of her. "Speakin' as someone who loves ya with all my heart, I reckon she'd be glad that Forrest was where he couldn't ever hurt ya again." I carefully kissed her forehead and then her cheek, avoidin' all the places where she was cut or bruised.

She give me a little nod afore I turned away and commenced to fix the water in the tub to the right temperature.

Izzy watched me silently.

When I was finished, I stood and placed the screen in front of the tub and turned to face her. "Darlin', I reckon you'll want to get in there now afore the water chills." She give me a little nod and went behind the screen.

As much as I longed to go back there and help her, I knowed she didn't want me to see the worst of what Forrest had done to her. I decided I wouldn't press her on that. Not yet.

I pulled out one of my Pa's books and settled in a chair, openin' it to the part where Gulliver awakes to find his legs and arms fastened to the ground. My mind couldn't settle on the words in front of me though, and I slammed the book shut in frustration. It was then that the sound of Izzy's quiet sobs come to my ears. Without a moment's hesitation, I tossed the book on the bed and hurried to my wife's side.


	55. Chapter 55

Izzy had managed to get her dress off and was leanin' against the tub wearin' only her shift, her body shakin' with sobs.

As much as I wanted to hold her, I was afeared of my touch causin' her pain. "What can I do?" I begged, feelin' helpless.

"I'm tired, I'm hurt, and I'm ugly." She said, still cryin'. "I hate him Ed. I hate him so much."

I couldn't stop from wrappin' my arms around her then and kissin' the side of her face.

After a time, she got control of herself, and spoke to me in a whisper. "Can ya help me get my shift off?"

I nodded afore carefully liftin' it up, notin' the bruises on her arms as I did. Once it was clear of her body, I found myself holdin' back a gasp.

_Dear Lord._

Her arms and legs had bruises on 'em, but her sides and back had definitely taken a beatin' as well. Izzy continued to look down at the floor and cry. "How can ya even stand to look at me?"

I shook my head and carefully turned her to face me. "Izzy, the worst part of seein' ya like this is knowin' I failed to protect ya. God's truth, I thought Forrest was long gone," my voice caught on the words. "I'm never gonna forgive myself for lettin' this happen." I hung my head, not able to look at her.

"Ed," she whispered as she put her hand on my cheek, makin' me look her in the eyes, "it ain't your fault. Ya saved me. Don't ya be takin' none of the guilt of this upon your own shoulders." She scolded. "I'm just feelin' sorry for myself is all, and I'm ashamed to say that it's my vanity makin' it so. Not that I think of myself as any great beauty mind ya, but at least I ain't never been _frightenin'_ to look at afore…"

"Izzy, ya could never be frightenin'." I leaned in and touched my lips to hers. "Ya are and will always be the most beautiful woman I've ever known. These marks is only temporary but even if they warn't, it wouldn't change the way I feel 'bout ya." I held up my maimed hand. "Ya taught me that when ya accepted me the way I was… by lovin' me despite my flaws."

She grabbed my hand and brought it to her swollen lips, kissin' it tenderly. "Ya got no flaws, Ed. Your poor hand serves to remind me daily of how close ya come to not survivin' that war. How close I come to never knowin' ya." She kissed my hand again.

"Thank ya for helpin' me undress." She sounded defeated as she placed her hand on the side of the tub.

She looked toward me and froze, her surprise showin' when she noticed I was unbuttonin' my shirt. Her eyes studied me as I removed each article of clothin' and then silently stepped into the tub, reachin' for her hand to help her over the side as well.

Once we were settled, I washed her battered body while she cried herself out against my chest, releasin' all the fear, pain and sorrow she'd been holdin' inside.


	56. Chapter 56

After Izzy was done cryin', and we'd both soaked 'til the water turned cold, I dried off and slipped on my drawers. Izzy pulled a plain white nightgown out of the clothes that Missus Duval had brought, and I helped her into it.

It didn't take much coaxin' for her to have a drink afore bed. I knowed sure as hell that I needed one, but was hopin' it would help Izzy to relax and mayhap dull her pain as well.

We sat quietly, Izzy sippin' on her drink while I downed mine in one swallow afore pourin' another. That did the trick, 'cause I could feel myself lettin' go as the warmth spread through me, my muscles finally goin' slack for the first time all day.

"She asked me if I minded havin' the clothes of a dead woman." Izzy's whispered voice surprised me.

"What's that?"

Izzy looked up at me, still sippin' her drink. "Missus Duval, she brought me the clothes and explained they belonged to her daughter. That gal had been 'bout the same size as me, but sickly all her life. Missus Duval said she passed on last year, but hadn't had the heart to part with her clothes 'til now. She said there was somethin' 'bout me telled her it was the right thing to do…"

I didn't know what to say in answer.

"Mayhap everythin', even bad things happen for a reason…." She spoke aloud, but I reckoned she was talkin' more to herself than to me.

When we finally settled in our bed, I thought Izzy would drift right off to sleep, but I was wrong. Evidently there was things preyin' on her mind that she needed to be relieved of.

"I ain't never been struck afore." She said in a whisper as we lay there starin' at the ceilin'. I pulled her closer as I grasped the meanin' of her words. "Not once had someone struck me in anger. My Pap used to tell me that I was the best child, never hardly needin' to be disciplined. ' _Izzy',_ he'd say,  _'soon as ya reckoned out the meanin' of the word 'no', sayin' it was enough to suffice.'_ Hearin' that used to set my brothers off, 'cause they was rascals." She said with a giggle.

She got quiet again for a spell. "But that man today Ed, he looked at me with pure hatred in his eyes. I don't know why, and now I reckon I never will." She took a deep breath. "It warn't 'cause I wouldn't marry him, he telled me that much."

There had been a question naggin' me since our talk with the doctor. Izzy had proven herself to be stronger than I ever thought, but had he gone far enough to break her? "Izzy, did he," now that it come down to it, I struggled findin' the words. "I'm sorry darlin' but I have to ask… Did he  _force_ himself on ya? It won't change the way I feel 'bout ya, I just…"

She shook her head. "No, Ed. Please don't trouble yourself 'bout that. I reckon in that way, I was lucky he was so angry. It seemed that he just wanted to beat on me. If he hadn't suspected that ya was followin' I don't doubt he would have beat me to death in that train car." She sniffled then and her voice dropped to a low whisper, "But he telled me that he was lookin' forward to killin' ya in front of me, just to make me suffer." Her voice cracked as a sob escaped. "After that, I don't know, mayhap he woulda forced himself on me, but I wouldn't a cared. If I'd lost ya, I wouldn't a cared 'bout nothin'." She turned her face to cry into my shoulder.

"It's over darlin'. Let it go."

_Mayhap I need to take my own advice…_

Sleep didn't come easy to me that night. Long after Izzy had drifted off, I still lay there, the events of the day playin' over and over in my mind 'til I thought mayhap I was goin' crazy.

The worst of the memories was findin' her gagged and bleedin'…

I warn't sure if I'd ever be able to wipe that image from my mind.


	57. Chapter 57

"Forrest said that he'd caught up to us in Monroe," Izzy telled the Sheriff in a soft voice. "He'd been followin' us since then, always keepin' a good distance away so's Jack wouldn't know. He was bidin' his time, waitin' to get me alone."

This was all news to me, although I hadn't pressed Izzy for information afore now.

The Sheriff nodded, and then asked her to tell what happened from the time James Forrest appeared the day afore. Izzy held my hand and, in a voice no louder than a whisper, proceeded to tell the same story she'd confided in the Doc's office.

It warn't no easier hearin' it for the second time.

The Sheriff listened without interruptin', now and then makin' a note of what she said.

When she was through, he studied us both for a long moment afore speakin'. "Thank you Missus Cullen," he telled her sincerely afore turnin' to me. "I read this," he held up Jake's letter so's I could see, "and I'm going to have to ask ya both to stay in town for a couple of days."

Izzy frowned and give me a questionin' look.

I patted her hand, knowin' I couldn't put off tellin' her about Jake's letter.

"I've sent wires to both Mississippi and Tennessee. Soon as I hear back from my inquiries, and they verify what you've told me is true, you'll be free to go." He telled us as he stood.

I nodded in understandin' and stood as well, Izzy risin' from her chair with me.

"If what this letter says is true, ya maybe ought to receive a medal for sendin' that Forrest feller to meet his maker, Mister Cullen." The Sheriff reached his hand out to shake mine. I took it gladly.

"Yes, sir."

****WYiMA****

Izzy was unnaturally quiet all the way back to the boardin' house. "Are ya in pain Izzy?"

She looked up at me, her bruises lookin' worse today. "Not much."

I nodded and walked along with her for a spell afore speakin' again. "Ya sure are quiet."

"I just want to get back so's I can see Jack."

This warn't like Izzy at all. Normally, she'd be dyin' of curiosity over that letter, makin' me tell her everythin' it said.

"Darlin', ya ain't mad at me are ya?"

She give me a surprised look then and almost smiled. "No, Ed. Why would I ever be mad at ya?"

"'Cause I didn't tell ya 'bout the letter."

She shrugged. "If ya kept it from me, ya musta had good reason. I reckon you'll tell me what's in it when you're ready."

I stayed on the back porch and watched while Izzy sat under a tree with Jack. She warn't feelin' up to playin' like they usually did when they was together. Jack looked over to me as if to say he knowed she was hurtin', afore layin' his head in her lap.

It was well after noon by the time I was able to coax Izzy into the house. Missus Duval had prepared lunch and when given the choice of eatin' downstairs or havin' the meal in our room, Izzy chose the privacy of our bedchamber.

She didn't say it aloud, but I knowed it was because of her bruises. She didn't want to face the other boarders and their curious stares.

After lunch, I tucked her in for a nap, while I penned two lengthy letters, the first to Jake, and the second to my brother. I wondered what Emmett would make of all that had occurred.

By my calculations, we'd reach him in a little over a month's time. I said a silent prayer that all of our adventures were now behind us.


	58. Chapter 58

"What ya doin'?" The sound of Izzy's voice startled me a little as I was just finishin' the letters to Jake and Emmett.

"Just writin'."

"Your brother?"

I nodded. "And Jake. Ya didn't sleep long," I said afore crossin' the room and lyin' down beside her on top of the covers.

She took a deep breath and turned her eyes to the ceilin'. "If I sleep too much now, I'll be awake all night."

That was probably true. I watched her as she continued to stare at the ceilin'. On top of the injuries that marked her beautiful face, she just looked so damned sad and defeated. "How ya feelin'?"

She shrugged. "I reckon I feel the same as this mornin'."

I taked my hand and run it over her hair. "Ya wanna go out and get some air?"

"Only to visit Jack. I don't wanna go nowhere for folks to see me like this."

I leaned over and kissed the top of her head, "I miss your smile darlin'." I telled her what was in my heart.

She rolled on her side to face me and placed her hand on my cheek. "I'm sorry Ed. I'm tryin', I really am." She tucked her other hand up under her pillow. "Part of the reason I'm feelin' this way is 'cause my monthly's fixin' to start, I can tell. I got other pains aside from the bruises."

I sighed. "I wish there was somethin' I could do…" I was feelin' useless again.

"Just don't give up on me," she whispered, and I found myself placin' my hand over hers in order to keep it pressed against my cheek.

"Never, darlin'." I telled her true.

****WYiMA****

The next day, we got word that the Sheriff wanted to see us. Izzy hid her face under her bonnet, hangin' her head as we walked the blocks to the jailhouse.

"Mister and Missus Cullen, I won't keep ya long," Sheriff Parker said as we took our seats in front of his desk. "I just wanted to let ya know that you're free to leave town. I got wires back this morning confirming that James Forrest is wanted for murder in both Tennessee and Mississippi. I'm waiting for a longer correspondence to give the details, but I won't keep ya waiting for that."

I glanced at Izzy and for the first time in two days seen the shadow of a smile pass over her face.

"I still have to write my report, and there may be further questions, so I'll need ya to leave information on how to contact ya in Texas."

He stood then and reached to shake my hand. "I won't be needing this anymore," he telled me as he placed Jake's letter in my hand. "I wish ya both a safe journey," He then turned to Izzy. "I'm as sorry as I can be for what happened to ya Ma'am."

"Thank ya sir," Izzy answered in a small voice.

Back at the boardin' house, I pulled Izzy away from her packin' to sit down beside me on the bed. Soon as she spied Jake's letter in my hand, her eyes grew wide.

I wrapped my arm 'round her shoulders. "Darlin', ya said that I would tell ya 'bout this when I was ready. In a short while, we'll be leavin' Shreveport behind us. I wanna leave all them bad memories behind as well Izzy." I give her shoulder a gentle squeeze. "This letter is the last of it. I know that for a time, your pain and what ya see in the mirror will trouble ya. But God willin' one of these mornin's soon, you'll wake to find no evidence a what that monster done to ya." I kissed the side of her head and placed Jake's letter into her tremblin' hand.


	59. Chapter 59

It seemed that as Izzy's wounds healed, her spirits healed along with 'em. My heart swelled in my chest 'bout three days out of Shreveport when we crossed into Texas, and she started smilin' again.

The days was hot, bein' as it was full on summer now. We started gettin' up and on the trail just afore dawn so's to do most of our travellin' afore the heat of the afternoon set in.

That's when we'd leave the trail and set up camp. I'd water and settle the horses afore helpin' Izzy with the daily chores such as washin' and cookin'. We was settlin' back into a comfortable routine, but Izzy was still keepin' her distance from me durin' the night.

As much as I missed bein' with her, I didn't know if she was still hurtin' so I warn't 'bout to press. I trusted her to let me know when she was ready.

One evenin', the kiss I give her goodnight turned more passionate than I'd intended. When Izzy didn't push me away, I let things between us progress in a natural fashion. It had been so long that my manhood responded and was soon throbbin' and ready against her leg. I forced myself to go slow, not wantin' to rush things.

When I pulled back from the kiss, her eyes was shinin' as she looked up at me. "I've missed ya Ed."

"I been right here darlin'; just waitin'."

"I know ya have. I don't deserve ya, that's for true." She said afore graspin' my head between her hands. "I love ya more than anythin'. Ya's my hero, ya know."

"I love ya too my sweet girl." I telled her with a smile as she run her fingers through my hair.

Then I commenced to show her exactly what them words meant, as we joined our bodies together in a slow, familiar dance.

The times that I joined with Izzy was a fair piece of heaven while in this world of hurt and confusion; but it was also much more.

As I held her, lovin' her with everythin' that was in me, the truth that I almost lost her hit me full force, and I clung to her as if my life depended on it. At that moment, everythin' I'd been holdin' inside since that terrible mornin' come to the surface as I gasped and moaned against her skin. By the time I fell over the edge takin' her with me, the tears in my eyes spilled over onto my cheeks.

I collapsed against my girl and shamelessly wept into her neck. She comforted me as only she could by rubbin' her hands over my back, holdin' me close, and whisperin' soft words into my ear.

We was connected to one another in a way that was hard for most folks to understand. It warn't just how it was when we was joined in the marriage bed, but every day, whether wakin' or sleepin', she was part of me, and I was part of her.

My heart didn't beat just to keep me livin' no more. It beat for the woman I loved, and she was the only thing keepin' me tied to this earth. If'n Izzy was to stop drawin' breath, I knowed for certain that I would follow right after.

It was the way of things with us now.


	60. Chapter 60

The days that followed were pert near the happiest of the entire journey. As we rode, Izzy would spend the time mendin' clothes or readin' from one of Pa's books to pass the time.

She took an instant likin' to  _Jane Eyre_.

"Poor Jane. Ain't it time she had some good luck for a change?" She growled in frustration. "I cain't read any more right now. I just wanna pull that Blanche Ingram's hair out by the roots!" She huffed as she slammed the book shut.

"Darlin', remember it's only a story." I answered with a smile.

"I know, but I cain't help it. It seems so real…"

She was interrupted by Jack puttin' his paws on her lap and reachin' up to lick her face.

We both laughed, and Izzy's mood seemed to lighten then.

"Why'd your Pap have all them books anyways Ed?"

I smiled thinkin' 'bout my Pa. "That man sure did love to read. Not that he had a lot of time for it, but when he did boy, nothin' could drag him away from his books." I chuckled and shook my head.

"His sister married a well-to-do farmer from Virginia, and her knowin' Pa's love for a good book, she used to send him one for his birthday and Christmas every year. It grew into quite a collection."

"Is she still alive?"

"My Aunt?"

Izzy nodded.

"I reckon she is. We sent word when we was fixin' to move to Texas, and then I had to send a letter that Pa was gone… I'm fair certain it hit her hard too. Even with him bein' a grown man, she doted on him as only an older sister knows how."

It made me happy to remember how embarrassed Pa would be when Aunt Amelia would fuss over him, but he never said a word, knowin' it would hurt her feelins.

I turned and seen that Izzy's smile was gone, and had been replaced by a sorrowful look. That was when I remembered her brothers...

"Darlin'," I said as I placed my hand on top of hers, "Why don't ya write to Henry and Theo? I'm sure they'd rather read from your hand that ya was alright, rather than hearin' it from Jake."

She smiled a little then. "You're right Ed. Next town we stop in, I'll send a letter."


	61. Chapter 61

One afternoon, when we was about two weeks outside of Shreveport and had stopped to set up camp near Corsicana Texas, two other wagons also headin' West, pulled up alongside of us.

They asked permission to camp there of course, and I found I didn't have the heart to refuse 'em, especially considerin' one of the wagons was carryin' a man and wife, John and Lizzie Tucker, along with two young'uns and their old granny.

The other wagon, well, let's just say if'n it had been them folks without the Tuckers; I'd a telled 'em to keep movin' on down the trail.

The man, who telled me his name was Alvin, warn't no farmer that was for sure 'cause he wore his hair all slicked back and his clothes warn't the kind that ya could wear while plowin' a field. He introduced his wife as Mathilda, or  _Tillie,_ as he called her.

Well that Tillie, she was a right handsome woman with her flaxen hair and lips painted up to be the color of ripe strawberries, but there also warn't no doubt by the way she flaunted herself in front of me and John Tucker, that she knowed she had the power to turn a head or two.

Try as she might, she couldn't turn mine.

I only had eyes for my Izzy.

After supper, the young'uns and their granny went off to their wagon to sleep. John and Alvin pulled out a bottle of whiskey, fixin' to imbibe. They asked me to join 'em, but I kindly refused, wantin' nothin' more, at that moment, than to fall asleep while holdin' Izzy in my arms.

She was already inside the wagon when I telled those fellers goodnight and hoisted myself onto the back of it. I happened to glance over to the other wagons then and noticed Tillie standin' by hers, starin' at me. When she caught my eye, she give me a longin' look and a wink. I narrowed my eyes and frowned in response, causin' her to quickly turn away.

I climbed into the wagon, still shakin' my head at her forwardness when I was surprised by Izzy's hands grippin' the front of my shirt and pullin' me to her.

"I'm gonna shoot me a floozy." She said through gritted teeth.

"What?"

"She wants ya Ed. Ain't it obvious? But she needn't think I'm gonna stand by and let that happen." The whole time she was talkin', I watched as she hanged a blanket over the openin' in the wagon's canopy, ensurin' our privacy.

My pecker come to life at the thought that maybe we warn't gonna let our unexpected company keep us from joinin' together tonight.

I shook that thought away for the moment, knowin' I needed to answer her. "Izzy, I ain't got a bit of interest in that woman or any other woman exceptin' you." I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her to me. "Ya know that's the God's truth, so why are ya frettin'?"

"Ed, I know ya don't want her. But I don't trust her. Not her, nor that husband of hers." She leaned in to whisper then. "If they's even married…"

I had to bite my lip to keep from smilin'.

"Well, married or not, she better keep her dirty hands offa my man, that's all I gotta say."

"I like ya feisty darlin', and jealous." I teased as I kissed her lips.

Izzy was just as passionate when we joined that evenin' as she'd been 'bout teachin' Tillie a lesson. As a matter of fact, she was so  _enthusiastic,_ that I kept havin' to remind her to keep quiet. After the third time of havin' to do so, I was right certain she was moanin' that loud on purpose.

I warn't sure, but I had a suspicion that it had somethin' to do with Tillie.

"I love ya Izzy," I whispered just afore fallin' asleep.

Izzy had wore me out good and proper.

I woke with a strong urge to piss. It was still hours afore dawn, but there was no puttin' it off.

After climbin' from the wagon, I give Jack's head a pat afore slippin' into the privacy of the nearby trees.

After I'd done my business, I didn't even have a chance to fasten my drawers afore a noise behind me had me spinnin' 'round to find the cause. My eyes liked to have bugged out of my head at what I seen. There, standin' behind me wearin' nothin' but a smile was Tillie.

She reached to put her arms 'round my neck but I took a quick step back, in an effort to get away. "What's the matter Ed? I know ya must be quite familiar with a woman's body; I heard how ya was pleasin' that little wife of yours… And I got so much more to offer than that little slip of a girl."

"Miss Tillie, I certainly hope for your sake that ya's drunk. Otherwise, ya's just a fool thinkin' I'd ever want anyone but my wife. I suggest ya cover up afore ya embarrass yourself any further." I started to move to go 'round her and back to my wagon when the sound of Alvin's voice stopped me dead in my tracks.

"Well what's all this?" Funny thing was, he didn't sound angry 'bout the way things looked between me and his wife. "And I thought ya was my friend, Ed." He continued in a quiet voice.

"I don't want no trouble with ya, Alvin. There ain't nothin' between me and your wife. I'm afeared that she's drunk. Ya need to see to her so's I can return to my wagon."

"How am I supposed to believe ya while you're standin' there with your drawers undone?" He snickered.

I looked down and sure enough, he was right. I remedied the situation right quick afore movin' to go around Tillie again. This time, Alvin pulled his gun. "Not so fast."

I stared at the gun that was pointed at me, and held up my hands as I tried to figure what to do next.

"Don't worry Ed, I ain't fixin' to shoot ya." He let out a chuckle and threw a shift at Tillie, tellin' her to cover up. She laughed right along with him as she dressed. "No, the way I see it, ya been triflin' with my wife and now ya owes me for the privilege."

"A feller doesn't travel all the way from Tennessee to Texas without carryin' a fair amount of money with him. So's I'm fixin' to relieve ya of a portion of it. I have to warn ya though that Tillie's charms don't come cheap."

"Like hell you're takin' our money!" Izzy's voice was a shock, but welcome, especially when it was followed by the sound of her cockin' the rifle. I turned to look at her, the expression on her face indicatin' that she was hotter 'n hellfire as she aimed that gun at Alvin.

"Ya better put than gun away right quick Alvin or else I'm gonna shoot ya where ya stand."

He sneered at Izzy, "If ya do that, ain't nothin' goin' to stop me from killin' your man."

"Ya ain't gonna shoot Ed, 'cause ya'll be too busy searchin' for your pecker after I shoot it off." She said in a threatenin' tone as she lowered the rifle 'til it was aimed straight at his pecker. "Ya got to the count of three. One… two… "

I had to give Alvin credit for havin' more sense than I believed him to possess when he dropped that gun and throwed his hands in the air.

By this time, John had arrived, gun drawn and lookin' mighty confused.

It turned out that John and Lizzie had only just met Alvin and Tillie that day while on the trail.

They was welcome to stay.

Alvin and Tillie however we sent away, after we relieved them of their guns.

"A word of warnin'," I telled 'em afore they left, "Ya best get a fair headstart 'cause if'n I catch up with ya, I'll be takin' ya to the Sheriff in the first town we get to."

"Ya ain't never gonna see us again Cullen," Alvin said with a hateful glare. He shook head. "Good luck, you're gonna need it married to that crazy woman."

At his words, Izzy and I both burst into laughter.

My wife was crazy alright. Crazy like a fox, that was for true.


	62. Chapter 62

_Correspondence sent to-_

_Messrs Henry and Theodorick Swan  
Springfield, Robertson County  
Tennessee_

_Hillsboro, Texas  
July 15, 1867_

_Dearest brothers,_

_I hope this letter finds you both well._

_My husband and I have finally made it as far as Texas and he says that in less than a month's time, we should be settling into our new home in San Angelo. Once we are there, we will be living with his brother, but are hopeful to have our own home before long._

_Ed is a good man and I have no doubt that he will work hard to make it so._

_Boys, when I left you I was in quite a state, and knowing you both as I do, I'm certain you worried yourselves sick over me. I hope this letter will ease your cares._

_By this time, the Blacks will have told you how things fared with me and Ed. It is true that, more than once since I last saw you, I have been fearful of not living to see another day. But now, the good Lord willing, all our troubles are behind us._

_Those men who brought pain and grief into our lives have gone to meet their judgment. It is something I do not like to think of, so I will not speak more of it now._

_I want you to know that I'm happier than I have ever been in the whole of my life. Ed has made all the difference, and saved me more than once from a fate that I would not wish upon an enemy._

_I love him, plain and simple, and am grateful to God that he shares those feelings._

_Ed and I have discussed it, and once we have our own home, we are hoping that you will both be of a mind to makes yours here in Texas with us._

_It will mean selling the farm, the only home any of us have ever known, but I believe that Mam and Pap would want us to be together._

_Until the time comes when I can see you both again, know that I miss you, think of you often, and hold you both close to my heart._

_Be good boys. Mind Mister and Missus Black. Work hard, and remember to say your prayers every night, and before you close your eyes in sleep, give a thought to your sister who loves you dearly._

_Isabella Cullen_

I watched as Izzy sealed her letter and handed it to the postmaster with a smile. She'd had me read the words afore sendin' it, and I said a quiet prayer that we prospered so's I could grant her wish and bring those boys to her soon.


	63. Chapter 63

"Where ya comin' from?" One of the horses had thrown a shoe, so Izzy and I found ourselves at the blacksmith's shop upon arrivin' in the town of Comanche.

"Tennessee," I answered.

The feller nodded. "Good to know ya ain't comin' from the coast. All the news from that way is bad. They got the yellow fever down there somethin' fierce. The town Doc says he heard tell they's declared it a epidemic."

That warn't good news. I only prayed the sickness stayed far away from us.

"'Course things ain't all rosy up here neither, on account of our Injun troubles." He talked as he worked on Lightnin's hoof.

"Really?" Izzy let out a little gasp.

This news warn't surprisin' to me, 'cause Emmett had written tellin' me and Pa as much the year afore.

"Yes, Ma'am," He said grinnin', takin' joy in her nervousness.

"Had right much trouble with 'em durin' the war, 'cause the men was away fightin'." Now there's lots of Yankee troops movin' in. I reckon they intend to keep the peace."

Izzy frowned. I knowed she was thinkin' of her Granny; it was showin' on her face.

"I reckon I'll just keep my mouth shut," she muttered once we was back on the trail.

"'Bout what darlin'?"

"What I got to say maybe won't sit well where we're goin'." She shrugged.

"Izzy, I never knowed ya to hold your tongue afore. Ain't no reason to start now," I telled her with a chuckle.

She laughed and give me a playful smack on the arm. "Well," She squinted into the sun. "Them fellers in the government always thinkin' they know what's best for the Indian. One feller gets in office and he has his notions, then he's replaced by another feller who has a different idea. No wonder the Indian don't trust a thing the white man says."

I nodded, not able to argue with her reasonin'.

"Izzy, I don't think things with the Indians in Texas are the same as back home."

"'Cause there ain't many left back home," she pert near shouted the words. "Alls I know Ed is what my Granny telled me. She always said that if her Mam hadn't married a white man and left North Carolina when she did, she'd a been forced to go West with her family and mayhap died on the way."

"What was it the government called it?  _Relocatin'?_ Marchin' folks to their death's more like it."

"So much for the white man's plan." She huffed. "Unless the plan was to kill 'em all along."

"We'll just have to see the way of things when we get there." I said afore drapin' my arm around her shoulders and pullin' her against me. "No matter the reasons, I'm mighty glad your Great-Granny come to Tennessee darlin'." God knows I meant what I said, as I smiled down at her.

Her eyes softened as she looked up at me, "Me too, Ed."


	64. Chapter 64

Most mornin's, when the weather was fair, I would walk, leadin' the horses. We was movin' at such a slow pace anyways that the walkin'didn't slow us down none. Settin' in the wagon all day got to be uncomfortable, and I was a feller used to bein' on my feet.

Izzy usually walked beside me, and she would tell me stories of when she was growin' up, and I'd tell her 'bout havin' Emmett as a brother. I reckon I was preparin' her, 'cause Emmett warn't nothin' like me.

He was friendly, but right loud, and I knowed he took a little gettin' used to.

This mornin' it was rainin', so I rode in the wagon. It was just as well, 'cause Izzy got up feelin' right poorly and I made her lie down again.

She lay there for quite a while, and I was startin' to worry. I kept recollectin' what that blacksmith had said 'bout the yellow fever. I didn't even know what the symptoms was, but his words had put the fear a God into me.

_Was it always gonna feel like this?_

_Now that I'd found her, was I always gonna be frettin' 'bout losin' her?_

I decided that was how it was when ya loved someone as much as I loved Izzy.

The nearest doctor was in the next town, which was at least another day's travel. I heared tell yellow fever victims went downhill right fast.

The rain had just let up when I started calculatin' in my mind whether I should turn back 'cause the last town we stopped in was closer than the one ahead, when I felt Izzy's arms wrap 'round my neck from behind.

"Stop your worryin', Ed." She breathed into my ear. "I can tell by lookin' at ya. Ya's all stiff from your frettin'."

I took in a deep breath and turned to look at her face. "How ya feelin'?"

"Better," she telled me with a genuine smile on her face. "Don't rightly know what was wrong, but I was real lightheaded. Maybe the heat is finally gettin' to me."

I nodded as I pondered her words. "Ya try to do too much in the afternoons. I want ya to slow down."

She sighed. "It ain't gettin' done otherwise."

"I'm just tellin' ya to move at a slower pace. Ya's too important to me Izzy. I don't want ya riskin' your health."

I turned to look forward again, and she leaned around and left a kiss on my cheek. "Alright, Ed. Ya's a worryin' fool, ya know that?"

I chuckled and patted her hand. "Only 'bout you darlin'."


	65. Chapter 65

I could hear Izzy singin' softly while hangin' the wash.

" _Come heartless bard of other years  
Once breath'd a helpless strain  
That absence conquers every tie  
and love grows cold again"_

We was only 'bout two days from my brother now, and she was excited at the prospect of meetin' Emmett and Rosa, but I could tell she was also a might nervous.

It was to be expected.

" _It may be thus but yet I know  
My thought will fondly roam  
Still though the dreams of the past  
It finds my Southern home."_

I was in the back of the wagon, sortin' through Pa's books for somethin' we could read after supper, when I noticed that her singin' had stopped, and Jack had started in to barkin' like mad.

The hairs on the back of my neck stood straight up at the thought that somethin' was wrong, and I pulled out my sidearm afore peerin' through the openin' in the wagon's canopy.

The first thing I seen was Izzy, crouchin' down in front of the fire with her arms wrapped 'round a mighty agitated Jack. Her eyes was wide and the rest of her seemed frozen in fear as she stared at three Indian braves on horseback, sittin' still as stone at the edge of the trees, while they eyed her with curiosity.

They, none of 'em, had weapons in their hands, so I made the decision to holster my gun in an effort to keep this from turnin' ugly. There warn't no way I was gonna take three of 'em out anyways, so's our best chance was to be friendly and hope they warn't lookin' for trouble.

"Izzy," I called as I climbed down from the wagon, figurin' I'd give a little warnin' of my approach.

All three of them fellers turned theirs head in my direction and kept their eyes on me as I made my way over, ' til I stood beside my wife. I give them a quick nod of my head, "How do?"

One of them give me a nod back, the other two just stared.

Not sure what to do, I turned to Izzy. "Maybe they's hungry?"

She spoke up then, "Would ya like some supper?" she asked while gesturin' to the pot of stew on the fire. She didn't wait for a response afore she handed the care of Jack over to me, and started spoonin' the stew onto plates. She broke hunks of bread and added them, offerin' it to the three strangers.

I watched as the feller who had nodded dismounted his horse, and carefully made his way towards us. The other two stayed put like they was waitin' for permission.

He stopped walkin' once he stood in front of us on the far side of the fire. "I'm Ed Cullen, and this here's my wife Izzy," I telled him.

The feller nodded again. "I am Nocoma," he said afore pointin' to the other fellers, "these are my brothers. They do not know your language."

Izzy offered him the plate again and he grabbed it from her hands without so much as a thank you, afore startin' in to eatin' with his fingers. He turned to his brothers and signaled them to join us.

They ate like they was starvin', and didn't stop 'til all the stew and bread was gone. As I watched 'em, my appetite seemed to abandon me 'cause I was worried 'bout what was gonna happen once they'd et their fill of my food.

_Would they be wantin' my wife as well?_

I'd heard tales of the Indians out west stealin' women and children away from their homes. My hand strayed to my sidearm, and I rested my palm against the butt of it.

It was then I noticed Nacoma's eyes was on me, watchin' my movements. He didn't say nothin' just kept eatin', but once he was done he stood and signaled to his brothers that it was time to leave.

They mounted the horses and Nacoma give me one more nod, "Aquetan, Ed Cullen," he said afore ridin' away.

Izzy let out a big breath and swayed on her feet as soon as they was out of sight. "Whoa, whoa, darlin'," I said as I caught her so's she wouldn't fall to the ground.

"Oh Ed, I don't think I took a breath the whole time they was here." She said as I helped to sit down and took my place beside her, keepin' my arm 'round her shoulders. "Is life in the West always gonna be this excitin'?"

I chuckled a little. "I hope not darlin'."

But I knowed for certain and for sure that I was gonna sleep with one eye open, and the gun right close by me tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies to the real Nacoma, a Comanche Chief, for borrowing his name.
> 
> Aquetan = Farewell
> 
> Thanks again! -Anne
> 
> Come join our Facebook group: Emmamama's Stories.


	66. Chapter 66

It was comin' on to late afternoon when we arrived in San Angelo. Izzy had insisted on wearin' her best dress, the red one. It was my favorite anyways on account a she wore it for our weddin'. She'd mended her other dresses as best she could, but the brown one hadn't been on her since the day I'd sent James Forrest to meet his maker.

Emmett had been right when he said there warn't nothin' much to the town as of yet, but there was a fair amount of buildin' goin' on in preparation for when the nearby Fort was fully manned.

I scanned the street while helpin' Izzy down from the wagon and noticed a tavern and a blacksmith shop. Once we stepped inside the tradin' post, it took my eyes a minute to adjust to the dark after bein' in the bright sunlight.

There was an old grizzled man behind the counter, and a younger feller talkin' to him. As soon as they seen us, they stopped and stared.

"How do? I'm needin' some directions to the Whitlock farm. My brother's the foreman there."

The old geezer narrowed his eyes. "Ya Emmett's brother?"

"Yes sir, name's Ed Cullen."

"Good to meet ya, Ed" he was all smiles then as he reached a hand out to me.

I shook it gratefully.

"Emmett said ya was movin' West. I'm Nate Hodges, I run this store," He gestured to the other feller. "This here's Jasper Whitlock, his daddy owns the farm, and Jasper owns everythin' here in the town, includin' the store."

Jasper smiled and reached his hand to me as well, but I noticed his movements was stiff, like it pained him to lift his arm.

"This is my wife Izzy," I said as Izzy give them a shy smile.

"Pleased to meet ya Ma'am," "Good day, Ma'am," They both spoke at once.

"My wife will be right pleased to hear there's another lady in town," Jasper telled Izzy with a smile. "If ya'll don't mind waitin' for a spell, I'll load my wagon and ya can follow me. Emmett's place isn't far from mine."

I nodded and thanked him. While we waited, I bought some sweets for Izzy, knowin' she was partial to 'em. When I turned around to hand 'em to her, I found her fannin' herself with her hand, her cheeks flamin'. "Darlin', I think the heat's got to ya."

The old feller, Nate, come around from behind the counter then, carryin' a stool and had her set down on it. He even fetched her some water.

She seemed to cool down after a spell. "I'm sorry Ed. I ain't quite myself today."

A few minutes later, we found ourselves followin' Jasper Whitlock down a dirt trail outside of town. After 'bout a mile, he stopped his wagon and motioned for us to pull up alongside.

"I've got to turn off here, but if y'all keep travellin' straight down this road another mile or so, the next house ya see will be Emmett's." He smiled then and tipped his hat. "It was nice meetin' ya Ed, Ma'am, and I'm sure we'll see ya again soon."

We thanked him, and continued on down the road.

I could feel Izzy practically tinglin' with excitement beside me. I looked down and swallowed a laugh when I seen Jack sittin' up straight on the other side of her, his eyes wide, his mouth open, and his tongue waggin'.

Afore long, I could see a fair sized farmhouse come into view. It looked as dusty as the landscape, but it was sure a welcome sight to my eyes.

This was gonna be me and Izzy's home for the time bein'.

I looked down at her face, her smile liked to have blinded me. "Welcome home, darlin'." I spoke the words into her ear.

"Oh, Ed, do ya think they'll like me?"

I grinned. "How could they not, sweet girl?"

She shook her head, smilin', as I pulled the wagon to a stop.

Rose and Emmett was out of the house afore we had a chance to climb down. I felt a lump formin' in my throat at the sight of my brother after all this time.

Emmett moved fast, even with his limp, and was at Izzy's side, pullin' her to him and liftin' her out, afore I could say a single word. "Hello little lady! I cain't tell ya how I been lookin' forward to meetin' ya."

"Welcome to the family!" He exclaimed as he set her down.

Izzy smiled at Emmett and then Rosa, and drawed in a deep breath. But just as she opened her mouth to speak, I seen her eyes roll back in her head and her legs give out from under her, as she fainted dead away afore us. Thank the good Lord my brother's reflexes was fast, 'cause he managed to catch her afore she hit the ground.


	67. Chapter 67

My heart was in my throat as I watched my brother cradle Izzy against his chest and carry her into the house. Rosa followed behind, directin' him towards the settee in the parlor.

Once he laid her down, I practically pushed Emmett out of the way so's I could kneel beside my poor girl. "Izzy," I called softly while takin' her hand between both of mine.

It struck me then how pale she was.

I could hear Jack whimperin' out on the porch, and knowed just how he was feelin'.

Rosa come up then and handed me a wet cloth. I untied Izzy's bonnet and pulled it off afore rubbin' the cloth over her forehead. I breathed a sigh of relief when I seen her eyes begin to flutter open.

"Izzy." I whispered.

"Ed," she said with a small smile.

"Ya give us quite a fright, darlin'."

She blinked a couple a times afore her eyes grew wide, as she obviously caught sight of Emmett and Rosa standin' behind me.

"Oh my," She gasped as her hand went to cover her mouth. "I am so sorry, what must ya think of me?"

"I'm thinkin' that was pert near the most excitin' 'howdy do' that I ever been witness to." Emmett said afore barkin' out a laugh. "I have a feelin' that life with Izzy around is gonna be right interestin'."

I could hear Rosa gigglin' with him, and afore long me and Izzy couldn't help but to join in.

I stood then to face my brother. "Good to see ya again."

He was smilin', but I could see the pain in his eyes afore he answered, no doubt he was thinkin' 'bout Pa, who was supposed to have made the journey with me. "You too, Ed. Been waitin' a long time for this day."

Emmett was never one for handshakes, his emotions always run way too high for that, so's I warn't surprised when he pulled me into a hug.

Then it was time for Rosa to peck my cheek afore busyin' herself by bringin' Izzy some tea. Next thing I knowed, they was chattin' like old friends.

I was more than thankful that Izzy seemin' to have recovered from her faintin' spell, but was kickin' myself for not givin' more of a care 'bout her health. After all, it hadn't been quite two months since she'd gotten that beatin' from Forrest….

I had a cup of coffee with my brother, and then he helped me see to the horses, afore he give me a quick tour of the house and grounds.

"Does that happen often?" Emmett asked as he pointed out the kitchen and privy out behind the house.

"What?"

"The faintin'."

I shook my head. "As far as I know, she ain't never done that afore. Mayhap it was just the heat and the fact that she was a might excited 'bout meetin' y'all."

I couldn't rightly make myself think 'bout it bein' somethin' worse.

The house was big; bigger than our home in Tennessee was.

There was a wide hallway that run from the front door all the way to the back of the house. Off the hallway, was a parlor and a dinin' room on one side, and two bed chambers on the other.

"Rosa and me took one of these rooms down here, it bein' summer, I thought ya'll would probably want the same, instead of one upstairs." Emmett looked a little embarrassed as he pointed to the empty bed chamber that would be mine and Izzy's."

We walked upstairs where there was two more empty bed chambers.

After the tour and a visit to the privy, Emmett helped me unload the wagon. When we carried the provisions into the kitchen, I was right happy to find Izzy in there, lookin' more like herself, as she helped Rosa cook supper.

"How are ya wife?" I asked in a teasin' fashion as I set down the potatoes from our wagon.

She smiled. "I reckon I've never felt better'n I do right now, husband." She answered as she started removin' the taters from the sack. I let my eyes linger on her face a little longer than was proper, but I didn't care; we was with family anyhow.

Izzy was fair beautiful to me, and I sometimes wondered how I was able to tear myself away from the sight of her to get anythin' done.

As I watched, her smile suddenly fell away, and was replaced by a pinched expression. "Uh..." she groaned afore droppin' the tater she was holdin' and runnin' outside.

I just stood there in shock as I stared after her. I turned to Emmet and Rosa to find surprised looks on their faces as well, afore takin' off out the door in search of my wife.

When I caught up to her, she was bent over at the waist, while heavin' the contents of her stomach into the yard.

"Izzy," I said in a hoarse whisper, as I felt myself startin' to panic.

Somethin' was wrong with my wife, but I was at a loss as to what I could do to help her.


	68. Chapter 68

If I lived to be a hundred, I was still never gonna understand womenfolk; Izzy, least of all.

She'd no sooner gotten sick all over the yard, afore she was herself again. I tended to stay close by when I was worried 'bout her, but she'd have none of that. She shooed me away, informin' that I had things to do, and she needed to finish helpin' with supper.

I was a might dejected when I started back to unloadin' the wagon.

"She won't let ya fuss over her huh?" Emmett asked, grinnin'.

I just shrugged.

"It's gettin' late, Ed. How 'bout we just unload what y'all need for tonight and leave the rest 'til tomorrow?" Emmett suggested as we set a trunk down in the hallway.

I nodded my agreement. "Well, we already got clothes, so I reckon the bed's all we need for tonight."

Emmett give me a mischievous grin and wiggled his eyebrows, "Yep you're gonna want that bed," he said afore climbin' into the wagon.

My mouth fell open in surprise at what he was insinuatin'. "I.. I.."

Emmett laughed out loud, and I give up on tryin' to answer him.

We grabbed the bedframe and mattress, and afore long, he was helpin' me piece it together in the bed chamber.

We worked in silence until Emmett spoke, "Ya know I was just teasin' don't ya Ed?"

"Huh?" I looked up at him, a might confused. "What ya on about?"

"What I said 'bout wantin' the bed."

"Oh."

Emmett give me a serious look then. "When ya wrote to tell me ya was married…" He stopped workin' for a minute and rubbed the back of his neck with his hand. "Well… truth is, neither of us was what could be referred to as  _men of the world._  But at least, afore I left for Texas intendin' to marry my Rosa, Pa give me some advice, ya know, 'bout the  _weddin' night_." He whispered the last two words. "I'm sorry no one was there to do the same for ya, Ed."

I couldn't help but smile to myself while starin' down at the footboard I was holdin' in my hands. My brother was worried that I didn't know my way 'round the marriage bed. I bit the inside of my cheek to keep from laughin' at the thought.

"I just want ya to know that ya can come to me if you're needin' to know anythin'."

"Ya  _do_ know that I been married almost three months now?"

He held his hands up then, "I understand that, I'm just offerin' my advice, same as Pa would."

I pursed my lips, "I appreciate that, but it ain't necessary Emmett."

He studied me for a long moment afore givin' a quick nod of his head and turnin' back to his work.

Izzy was right quiet durin' supper, and I was afeared that she was feelin' poorly again, especially when she wanted to retire to our room immediately after helpin' Rosa to clean up.

When she moaned in contentment after crawlin' between the covers and stretchin' out on the soft mattress, the sound of it made my pecker stand up and take notice. I tried to will him to behave, considerin' how poorly Izzy was feelin' earlier, but he warn't listenin' to reason.

"I reckon this is what heaven must feel like," Izzy smiled afore turnin' on her side to face me. I smiled back at her, tryin' to ignore the willful little bastard below my waist.

"Ya know what's the best part?"

"What's that?" I couldn't help but grin at her.

"We don't have to get up tomorrow and get back on that blasted trail!" She giggled.

I pulled her to me so's I could kiss her. She hummed against my lips and then drew back to look at my face. "Did ya know Rosa's expectin'?"

_Huh?_

"Well, that look on your face sure answers the question." She laughed lightly afore continuin', "She telled me that the babe will come shortly after Christmas."

Now that I recollected, Rosa's figure did seem a might fuller than I remembered, not that I paid that much mind. Izzy would always be the only gal able to catch my eye.

"Why didn't Emmett say somethin'?" I asked, feelin' a might put out that he didn't.

"They lost a babe earlier this year." Izzy looked at me with sad eyes, "Rosa said they ain't telled many folks 'bout this one yet."

"I had no idea," I drew in a deep breath, feelin' more than sorry for my poor brother and his wife.

"Well, it ain't exactly somethin' ya discuss in a letter." She added softly.

We was quiet for a minute, and I couldn't help but smile at the thought of Emmett with a young'un. And then I imagined what it would be like when it was me and Izzy expectin'…

"Ed," Izzy's soft voice pulled me from my musin's.

"Yeah, darlin'?"

"Rosa thinks I'm expectin' too."

Damned if my jaw didn't drop open and stay that way as she continued to speak.

"I been feelin' light-headed, and sick to my stomach." She placed her hand on my cheek and I come to my senses enough to close my gapin' mouth. "And there's other things… I ain't had my monthly since Shreveport."

_That was pert near two months ago…_

"I knowed I was late, but to be honest, I was fearful there was somethin' wrong with me, after everythin' that's happened… But now, I'm thinkin' that Rosa may be right…" She give me a hopeful smile.

I smiled back. How could I not?

_A babe_

_A child of our own_

I looked down at her, knowin' I was grinnin' like a fool at the prospect, and kissed her softly.

"When will we know for sure?" I asked.

"I suppose time will tell. If the symptoms persist, then I can see a doctor to confirm it." She drew in a deep breath. "But I'm fair certain it's true."

I pulled her close and kissed her again. "I love ya so."

"I love ya too, Ed."

We lay there for a time, the same thoughts no doubt runnin' through Izzy's mind that was runnin' through mine. I could see her holdin' a sweet little babe with dark hair and eyes just like hers.

Suddenly, I couldn't wait for that day to arrive.

Izzy yawned into my shoulder, "I'm glad ya set up the bed. Otherwise I reckon we'd be sleepin' in the wagon tonight."

I smiled, and then remembered my brother's words while we was puttin' the bed together, and couldn't help but laugh.

"What's got ya so tickled?"

"Just thinkin' 'bout Emmett," I wondered if I should tell her, but knowin' Izzy, I reckoned she'd be as amused as me. "He was tryin' to give me advice 'bout  _marital relations._ "

"What?"

I smiled at her. "I think he's worried I ain't doin' it right," we both laughed then.

"Ed," she looked up at me grinnin'.

"Yes, Izzy."

"We's gonna have a child, I think ya's doin' it right."

I laughed out loud again and pressed her back against the mattress afore kissin' her hard. "Darlin', I swear I love ya more now than the day I married ya, and that's sayin' somethin'. Thank ya for givin' me…  _everythin'_."

"Sweet talker," she grinned afore quirkin' her eyebrow at me. "Kiss me like that again, and I'll give ya a little somethin' special afore we go to sleep." She said while hitchin' one of her legs 'round my hip.

Oh hell yeah I kissed her, warn't nothin' on earth coulda stopped me.


	69. Chapter 69

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Facebook: Annie Author Vandv and in the group: Emmamama's Stories.

My heart was filled to burstin' as I made my way over to shut the door. The thought of me and Izzy havin' a child was both thrillin' and a might frightenin' at the same time. Knowin' my mind as I did, I made an effort to push back the fear tryin' to claw its way to the surface.

There would be plenty of time later to fret 'bout what was comin'. But for tonight, I felt the need to take pleasure in the fact that we was expectin', and that me and Izzy had finally arrived at our new home.

This was a day I'd keep in my memory for a good long while, and the need I was feelin' to be close to Izzy, to make love to her, had never been stronger.

"Maybe we should wait 'til Emmett and Rosa go to bed." Izzy suggested as I put out the lamp and shed my clothes afore climbin' back in next to her.

"Why's that darlin'?"I asked, pullin' her against me while workin' my hands up under her shift 'til they was touchin' bare flesh.

"In case they hear us, Ed." She answered in a whisper.

I smiled in the dark and kicked off the covers, it was too hot to abide 'em. "Izzy, their bed chamber's right next door. Don't ya reckon they'd hear us even better if'n they was in there."

When I come in from washin' up, Rosa was settin' in the parlor sewin', and Emmett was still outside.

"Ya just gotta learn to be quiet pretty girl." I teased, knowin' my words would set her off.

"Ed Cullen!" She gasped. "The good Lord's gonna punish ya for the lies ya tell."

"Ya know I ain't the one that moans so loud that it sets Jack to howlin'." She answered causin' me to laugh out loud.

"I won't deny it. It's what ya do to me darlin'. But I promise to be as quiet as a church mouse." I whispered as I pulled the shift up, she raised her arms, offerin' no resistance.

There we was, flesh against flesh, and as soon as I pressed my lips to hers, Izzy was grabbin' onto my shoulders, holdin' me tight against her. It was almost like she was afeared I was gonna pull away.

I warn't goin' nowhere.

Not ever.

"I love ya so much, Ed. And I think I'm already startin' to love our new home and family. And now, havin' a young'un," her voice cracked, the tears threatenin', "It's almost too much to take in. I am really and truly blessed."

"Izzy, I'm the one that the Lord has shown particular kindness toward. Havin' ya as my wife means everythin'. I don't reckon I know what I'd do without ya."

"I was right ya know."

I just looked at her face then, her eyes shinin' up at me in the faint moonlight peepin' through the window.

"Ya is quite a sweet talker when ya have a mind."

I didn't answer; I just kissed her, startin' with her lips and not stoppin' 'til I'd kissed pert near every inch of her soft skin. Soon, we was joined together in a dance, always new and yet somehow familiar as well.

How I was able to keep my promise and stay quiet as our limbs was wrapped around each other, and Izzy's hands was pressed against the flesh of my backside, was a mystery. But, stay quiet I did, exceptin' for the soft words I whispered in her ear.

They was just for her.

Even when we was in the wagon and I spoke 'em loudly, they was always for her ears alone.

When we finished, we lay together, not a stitch of clothin' nor a sheet to cover our bare flesh, and drifted to sleep in each other's arms.

I warn't sure if it was the cool air that woke me or the fact that when I reached beside me, I come up with nothin' but empty bed. I opened my eyes and they was immediately drawn to the figure standin' in front of the open window.

I gasped out loud at the sight of her, and she turned at the sound, givin' me a sweet smile.

Sometime durin' the night, a rain storm had blown through. I could hear the drops peltin' the sill in front of where she stood, still bare, and lookin' like one of them goddesses I read about in Pa's volume of Greek mythology.

My mind, and other part of me was immediately awake and wantin'.

"Izzy girl, come back to bed." I said as I reached a hand toward her.

She continued to smile as she walked back over, not a bit shy over the fact she warn't wearin' a stitch.

As soon as she was beside me, I pulled her into my arms and began to kiss her.

She knowed me well enough by now to know what was next.

"The air feels so good, Ed." Her voice was sultry, and I had a fear I might finish afore I was even inside her. "I had to feel that breeze. I was so hot in bed that I was sweatin' like a stuck pig."

I stopped kissin' her and dropped my face to her shoulder as I tried to muffle my laughter. Izzy giggled then and I lifted my head, grinnin' at her like a fool.

"Izzy darlin', I can rightly say I ain't never met another soul that had such a way with words."

She give me a little shrug. "I really need to try and stop lettin' everythin' that's in my head come right out my mouth."

I shook my head. "No, darlin'. Don't change. Don't ya  _ever_ change." I telled her afore kissin' her breathless.


	70. Chapter 70

"Ed, let's talk business." Emmett said after we was through with supper.

I hadn't seen him all day, Izzy and me havin' slept uncommonly late. I didn't begrudge my girl the extra rest, but it was the first time since returnin' from the war that I hadn't woke afore the sun.

I'd spent the day unloadin' the rest of the wagon and seein' to whatever I could around Emmett and Rosa's place 'til he got home.

Emmett set down two glasses of whiskey in front of us after we was seated on the front porch.

"Old man Whitlock's made me an offer that I'd be a fool not to accept." Emmett warn't one for beatin' 'round the bush, always gettin' straight to the point. He took a sip of his whiskey afore continuin'. "If I do accept, it's gonna affect ya as well, so I gotta ask; ya still got your heart set on farmin' for yourself?"

I nodded, more than a might confused as to where this was headed.

He nodded back. "I like workin' for old man Whitlock, but part of me has always wanted my own place."

He rubbed his chin. "Thing is, if I take his offer, I'll be able to do both."

"He's offered to sell us over two hundred acres of his farm at a fair price. For true, it's more than fair. His price is less than what we got for sellin' Pa's farm, Ed, and ya know that warn't anywhere near as much land."

This definitely warn't what I was expectin' to hear. I thought it would be some time afore me or Emmett could think of purchasin' our own land. "Where's the land he's sellin'?"

"We're settin' on it." He give me a meaningful look. "Whitlock almost lost everythin' durin' the war. The way he sees it, me comin' on as foreman saved his farm. Fair to say he wants me to stick around." Emmett was grinnin' then and shrugged. "I do a good job. His farm hands ain't wastin' time while I'm there."

"Anyways, he says he'll sell us the land, includin' this house, so long as I agree to stay on as foreman for a span of no less than seven years."

It sounded too good to be true. I wondered if the land he was willin' to part with was no good for farmin'.

Emmett noted my frown and kept talkin', "He ain't tryin' to swindle us, Ed. The soil here is rich on account a the nearby rivers. So there's plenty of water as well. It's perfect. The only problem is that since I'll be busy at Whitlock's, the majority of the work on the farm will fall to you."

I shrugged, not bein' a stranger to hard work. "We can start out small, but I reckon we'll turn a fair profit after a year, and my wages will carry us through 'til that time."

I smiled for the first time since we'd stepped outside, and Emmett looked a might relieved.

"Did ya ever doubt I'd agree brother?" I teased him.

"Well now, I'll admit that sometimes ya are a might unpredictable; like the time ya married that little gal who was stowed away in your wagon." He laughed as he slapped me on the back.

The reminder of Izzy brought another smile to my face, and I took a sip of whiskey while thinkin' 'bout my sweet girl.

The night air was still and hot; that along with the burn of the whiskey worked to relax me. From my spot on the porch, I could hear Izzy and Rosa laughin' inside the house. It warmed my heart to know that my brother and his wife had already taken to her.

"S'good to be here Emmett." I telled him sincerely. "It's already feelin' like home."

He smiled.

"Emmett?"

"Yeah?"

"Why ain't Whitlock's son runnin' the farm for him?"

"Jasper?"

I nodded.

Emmett rubbed his chin again. "Jasper's story is one worth hearin' if ya ain't in a hurry for bed?"

I was always in a hurry for bed, but I warn't 'bout to admit that to my brother.


	71. Chapter 71

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Facebook: Annie Author Vandv and in the group: Emmamama's Stories.

"I reckon ya could say that Jasper and his Missus have been to Hell and back." Emmett began the story while refillin' our glasses. "Just like the rest of us, he don't speak of it much, but he seen his fair share of the worst."

His words had me recallin' the worst a what I'd seen; my friends gettin' cut to ribbons right in front of my eyes.

"Just afore I was to marry Rosa, me and Jasper went to the tavern and tied one on." He was grinnin' in that way he'd always done after he'd earned a trip to the woodshed. I laughed and shook my head.

Lord, how I'd missed him.

"If'n ya was here Ed, you'd a been right there with us," he said in a teasin' fashion, afore turnin' serious again. "After a few drinks, we started in to talkin' 'bout the war. Soon it turned into a competition 'bout who'd seen the highest rankin' officer. 'Course, Jasper beat me there, 'cause he'd met General Lee hisself in Virginia."

"But I didn't envy him, 'specially after what he telled me next."

While he talked, Jack come up and sprawled across the porch at my feet. We'd only been here a day, and he was already actin' like he owned the place.

"He was there in Petersburg right in the thick of things durin' the Battle of the Crater."

My eyes grew wide as I listened.

"Jasper got hurt; burned on one side of his body, he keeps the scars covered, but they're there from the neck down. His right arm's practically useless to him 'cause of what he suffered. They sent him to the hospital in Richmond where he pert near died from his wounds. But the Lord had other plans, 'cause he had a angel of mercy tendin' to him in the form of Mary Alice, the gal who's now his wife."

I knowed already that I was gonna like her. Havin' been wounded myself, I'd seen many a Southern lady work tirelessly; carin' for us soldiers as if we was their own husband or son. Encouragin' us as we mended, cryin' over those that succumbed…

"An angel for true. He telled me that's just what he thought she was first time he seen her, 'cause he was delirious from the pain and thought he'd died."

"Three times," Emmett held up three fingers. "It was three times, the doctors said there warn't no hope for him, and three times, Mary Alice brought him back to the land of the livin'. He loves her somethin' fierce."

I knowed the feelin'…

"Jasper was still healin', time Richmond fell months later, and he and Mary Alice barely escaped with their lives to her Uncle's home, south of the city. When the war was finally over a few weeks followin', Jasper started makin' plans to come home to Texas. He was still right weak, and Mary Alice warn't lettin' him go nowhere without her. 'Course her Ma and Pa telled her she warn't goin' off an unmarried woman."

"The day afore Jasper was set to leave, Mary Alice telled him that they was gettin' hitched and had the minister come to the house to perform the ceremony." Emmett chuckled. "Jasper actually shed a tear when he telled me how he tried to resist her, not wantin' her to throw her life away on 'half a man' as he believes hisself to be. But Mary Alice stood her ground and he crumbled like a house of cards."

"She's a tiny little thing, and it's hard to believe she can have so much sway over a grown man, but there ya have it."

I nodded, thinkin' 'bout my own bride then. "I reckon we all three been blessed more than we deserve."

"That's the God's truth." Emmett whispered afore downin' the last of his whiskey. "Because of his injuries, Jasper warn't much help to his Pa on the farm, so once I took over, he devoted his time to expandin' the town. I think ya seen the evidence of his work."

I nodded.

"As soon as the Fort is fully manned, he's gonna be makin' more money than he'll know what to do with…"

"What are y'all doin' out here?" Rosa's sweet voice sounded from behind us.

It was a welcome interruption, 'specially when I heared the voice of my girl chime in.

"Seems to me they's gossipin' like a couple of old women." Isabella answered. I turned to see her grinnin' at me, just afore she and Rosa started in to laughin'.

My brother give me a knowin' smile.

We was for certain blessed much more than we could ever deserve.


	72. Chapter 72

All that talk of the war made for an uneasy night. My dreams was haunted by the faces of fellers I knowed to be dead, causin' me to wake more than once and reach for my wife.

As I'd come to learn, her touch had a calmin' effect on me, better'n any tonic.

Even so, the next mornin', I was fair certain that the strain of the restless night was showin' on my face.

Izzy and Rosa was up afore the rooster, bakin' biscuits and brewin' coffee for me and Emmett. I took mine from my wife gratefully as she studied me. "Ya alright?" she asked in a voice barely above a whisper. I nodded and give her a small smile. She then run her hand soothin'ly across my cheek, not mindin' if Emmett or Rosa seen her.

I leaned into her hand, and closed my eyes.

The moment didn't last long, 'cause work was callin' to me. I was preparin' the fields for a crop of winter wheat, while Emmett worked at Whitlock's.

***WYiMA***

The followin' Sunday, we was finally able to meet Mary Alice Whitlock face to face, when Rosa and Emmett invited Jasper and his Missus for Sunday dinner.

For as much as her husband seemed a quiet sort of feller, preferrin' to keep the workin's of his mind to hisself, Mary Alice was the opposite. From the minute she come bustlin' through the front door, carryin' two pies, one a peach and the other apple, she never did stop talkin'.

I found myself just sittin' back and listenin' as she went on with story after story of growin' up as the middle born of five girls. Seems Mary Alice spent a lot of time tryin' to get her parents' attention, and the tales she telled had all of us laughin' out of sheer delight.

"My Mother is quite the proper lady," Alice began with a giggle, "She hates the fact that my Father chews tobacco. So when I helped myself to a bit of it and got ill, she fussed at him rather than me. I still can't bear to look at the stuff."

"Mary Alice!" Rosa was laughin' but she had a pinched look on her face. "Why in the world did ya wanna taste that for?"

"I was only ten." She was smilin', but the smile faded as she pondered Rosa's question. "I don't rightly know why I did the things I did. When I was a child, I always felt ready to burst at the seams. The days were never long enough, the outdoors never big enough, the walls of our home were confinin', my daily routine, suffocatin'." She sighed. "I truly believe that the good Lord made this land" she gestured toward the landscape outside the widow, "with me in mind. I am content here, with my Jasper." She turned to smile at the feller in question and patted his hand.

Unlike Rosa, whose kin lived nearby, Izzy and Alice seemed to strike up a bond built 'round the fact that they was both missin' the family they'd left behind. It didn't hurt my feelin's none to hear Izzy say it. Her brothers was still in Tennessee, along with the memory of her Ma and Pa. She was always gonna miss home for them reasons, but I silently prayed that someday she'd be as taken with Texas as Mary Alice was.

I wanted nothin' more than to see her happy here.

That evenin' as I sat by, conversin' with Jasper, there warn't no way I couldn't take notice of his scars. The first time I'd met him, he'd had a kerchief 'round his neck. At Sunday dinner, that warn't the case. I remembered thinkin' to myself that he was lucky that the burns stopped at his neck and didn't mar his face.

More than that, he was lucky to be alive.

"Jasper and I received word yesterday that my sister Verity and her new husband Mister William Branch will be paying us a visit whilst on their honeymoon next month." Mary Alice looked right pleased with the prospect.

"Mary Alice, that's happy news indeed." Rosa said with a genuine smile.

Mary Alice returned her smile. "I believe so as well. But I would venture to guess that my Mother doesn't share those sentiments. She's very much against the trip, convinced that Verity and Mister Branch will be set upon by savages." Mary Alice giggled. "I declare, the poor soul probably lies awake more nights than not, fearin' for mine and Jasper's safety."

My brother and I shared a look then. Emmett and me had discussed how things warn't always civil between the locals and the Indians. The most important thing was for us to remain vigilant.

"Remains to be seen what will happen when all them soldiers arrive." Jasper telled her in a low voice.

Izzy looked a bit fearful. She had to know that I was never gonna let anyone hurt her again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Winding down…2 more chapter before the epi posts on 4 July. There will be a second epi after that which will complete the story, but keep it on alert, because I may add a chapter from time to time. I kind of love Izzy and Ed, it will be hard to say goodbye.
> 
> Thanks! Find me on Facebook: Annie Author Vandv and in the group: Emmamama's Stories.


	73. Chapter 73

Just like me, Izzy seemed most suited to life on a farm. Well, I reckon she'd be at home anywhere there was critters to tend to. I got particular joy outta watchin' her, whether she was feedin' the chickens or milkin' a cow.

She'd talk to 'em like they was people; same way she talked to Jack.

"She's one of a kind, Ed." I heared Rosa say quietly from beside me as I watched Izzy stop to pet Jack on her way to the kitchen carryin' her basket of eggs.

I turned to look at Rosa and found her studyin' me. I nodded, "That she is."

Rosa smiled then. "I know ya treasure her, you're a good man, like your brother." I noticed that Rosa's hand went to rest on her belly, and it occurred to me that I couldn't wait 'til Izzy grew round with our child, so's the world would know our good news.

"Rosa, when I was unpackin' I found a letter ya wrote to Pa. I want ya to know that I didn't read it, but I was fair certain ya would want it back."

I watched as her eyes filled with her tears. "I wrote him right after me and Emmett married. It was mostly to thank him for raisin' Emmett to be the fine man he is. It doesn't surprise me that he didn't share it with ya. He was such a private man." She wiped her eyes afore continuin'.

"Ya can read it if ya like, but I suppose I should like to keep it." She said afore growin' quiet, and I turned my attention back to Izzy who was now laughin' and lettin' that silly dog lick all over her face.

***WYiMA***

"That book must be mighty interestin'," I heared my wife's sweet voice and I turned from my journal to see her freshly bathed, wearin' only her shift, and crawlin' into bed.

I smiled at her and closed my journal afore crossin' the room to take my place beside her. "That there journal is filled with tales of a beautiful gal with dark hair, and dark eyes that hold just enough fire in 'em to bewitch a man." She giggled as I pulled her against me. "I'm fair certain I ain't been the same since the day I met her."

"Aren't ya pinin' for the way things was afore, Ed? Maybe wishin' ya was single again, instead of tied down for the rest of your days?" She was smilin' while sayin' the words, so I knowed she was teasin'.

I laughed. "No Ma'am. I never wanna go back. I'll gladly stay shackled to ya and this life forever my darlin'."

That was the night I give her permission to read my journal if'n she had the desire.

It was a good long while afore she took me up on the offer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1 more chapter before the epi posts on 4 July. There will be a second epi after that which will complete the story.
> 
> Keep it on alert, because I may add a chapter from time to time.
> 
> Thanks! Find me on Facebook: Annie Author Vandv and in the group: Emmamama's Stories.


	74. Chapter 74

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter….epilogues to come, but I know we will be seeing these characters again.
> 
> Enjoy!

"Damn ya straight to hell, ya contrary sumbitch," I slammed the shovel down as I muttered. I'd been clearin' rocks from the same plot of earth for nigh on two hours, and makin' very little progress. The gasp I heared comin' from behind me caused me squeeze my eyes shut from embarrassment. I knowed for sure and for certain that when I opened 'em, I'd find my wife was standin' behind me; and there was no doubt in my mind that she'd been a witness to my swearin'.

I turned to face her, an apology ready on my tongue, only to find her hidin' a smile behind her hand. Bein' raised to be a gentleman, I apologized anyhow. "Sorry Izzy, ya warn't meant to hear that."

She give me a bright smile, and even though I was sweatin' like a whore in church, she wrapped her arms 'round my damp shirt and pulled me close. "It's alright, Ed. I ain't so delicate that I never heared a man swear afore."

I knowed that was the truth. The run-ins with James Forrest and his filthy mouth come immediately to mind, but I pushed those memories away.

"Glad to see ya darlin', ya feelin' better?" I asked afore placin' a kiss on her nose.

Truth was, Izzy had been feelin' a might puny for the last day or so, it was reassurin' to see her lookin' herself again. "Yeah, I reckon the heat and bein' with child is more 'n I'm used to."

"And ya been doin' too much," I arched a brow at her, darin' her to argue. We'd had words that mornin' afore I left for the fields, over the fact that she was workin' too hard. "Ya finally gonna take it easy?"

I couldn't find it in me to stay angry with her, 'specially when she warn't well. But she was one stubborn woman.

She nodded. "I'm sorry I worried ya. Rosa, she's been fussin' at me for two days straight 'bout runnin' myself ragged. She says that durin' the hot months we should be restin' for a spell after the midday meal."

"She's lived here all her life darlin', I reckon she knows the way of things."

"I know. I find it hard to lie down in the middle of the day, but I'll learn; cain't help it that I'm a might bull headed."

I laughed and kissed her again. "I'm sorry I was short with ya this mornin'."

She shook her head, not lettin' me finish. "Ya worry 'bout me. I'm gonna try my best to not give ya cause from here on out."

I breathed out a contented sigh and wrapped my arm tight 'round her shoulders as we surveyed the field.

"This one's taken ya longer than the others," Izzy remarked.

I nodded. "It's nothin' but rocks."

"Good thing the Lord blessed ya with so much patience." She couldn't help but giggle.

I smiled and shook my head. "I reckon it's somethin' I need to work on…"

***WYiMA***

"How's it feel to know that when ya wake up tomorrow, you'll be a whole year older?" Izzy was practically bouncin' with excitement as we made ready for bed.

It was fair September. We'd been in Texas over a month, and the next day I was set to turn twenty-one years of age.

"It's just another day darlin', nothin' special." I said as I stripped, leavin' on just my drawers. The weather had turned a bit milder, and I come to appreciate it, 'specially at night when I could hold my wife close without the heat makin' the contact uncomfortable.

Izzy was quiet for a spell as we both lay there in the dark. "How'd ya celebrate last year?" She asked in barely a whisper.

I thought back to the year afore and the birthday spent with my Pa. "I worked on the farm as usual, but that night me and Pa met Jake and his Pa at the tavern. We had a right enjoyable time." I smiled, thinkin' back on it.

Izzy was silent for a whole minute, and I wondered if she was fallin' asleep. "Was that _woman_ there?" Not understandin' why she suddenly sounded angry, I turned toward her and tried to make out her features in the dark.

"What ya on about Izzy?"

She grunted out a breath of air, " _Miss Sally._ Was she there to help ya celebrate?"

I felt myself smilin' at the fact that Izzy was jealous and not even attemptin' to hide it. "Well," I pulled her close and tried not to laugh out loud as I felt her whole body stiffen. "She was there, and she did wish me a happy birthday."

Izzy pushed back a little then so there was a couple inches of space between us.

"Did she touch ya?" then she gasped as she suddenly thought of somethin' else, "Did she try to _kiss ya_?"

I couldn't hold the laugh inside then. "Of course not darlin'. I admit Miss Sally was forward with me more than once, but not on my birthday, and most definitely not in front of my Pa. Rest your mind."

She seemed to take my words to heart. "I'm sorry Ed. I gotta stop lettin' everythin' that's in my head escape out my mouth. I'll be a terrible example for the babe if I don't."

I shook my head. "Darlin', ya could never set a bad example for our child. I know you're gonna be the best mother and I cain't wait to see it. And please don't stop speakin' your mind. It's honest and true, only deceitful people would be put off by it."

"Rosa will be a wonderful mother…"

"That I do believe." I dropped my voice to the lowest whisper. "But you'll still be better." Izzy giggled then.

"When the time comes for Rosa, she wants me to be there helpin' Mary Alice."

I'd learned some time afore that Mary Alice had assisted old Missus Greene with mid-wifin' duties until the poor soul passed away the year afore. There not bein' a proper doctor around for miles, the job seemed to fall squarely on Mary Alice, but she reveled in it.

"I don't understand why Mary Alice wants to mid-wife. She and Jasper are well-off. It ain't like she needs the income."

Izzy hesitated afore answerin'. "She telled me that she's fair certain she'll never have a child of her own. She's been married well over two years now and ain't found herself in the family way yet." I frowned, suddenly feelin' pity for Jasper. It seemed cruel that, on top of everythin' else he'd suffered, he warn't gonna experience the joy of bein' a Pa.

"She says that bringin' new life into the world fulfills that need inside of havin' a babe of her own."

"I suppose she'll be helpin' ya as well?"

She nodded against my shoulder. "Seems a long ways away…"

I placed my hand on her stomach and felt where the flesh was beginnin' to grow. It still warn't noticeable to others and wouldn't be for quite some time, but I could tell. "The time's gonna be here sooner that ya think pretty girl."

***WYiMA***

"Pack a picnic lunch," I whispered in Izzy's ear afore I left for the fields the next day. Most days, after havin' my midday meal with her, I'd taken to stayin' for a while, makin' certain that she was restin' like she was supposed to.

Today was gonna be different. It was my birthday, but I planned that Izzy would be the one receivin' the gifts.

Our picnic by the pond would be the perfect settin'.

Of course Izzy'd seen the pond afore many times. It warn't too far from Emmett's house, but far enough to be out of sight. I left Lightinin' to graze, and spread the quilt under the shade of the trees.

"This was a nice idea." Izzy sighed and smiled as she started to unpack the picnic basket.

"I brought ya here for a reason." I telled her as we dug into the spread of food.

I gestured toward the land on the far side of the pond. "Ya see that little grove of trees over yonder?"

She nodded, lookin' at them with interest now.

"I reckoned that would be a fine place to build a house."

Her eyes widened and her cheeks seemed to flush at my words.

I smiled. "As soon as the babe arrives, I intend to build our home Izzy. It won't be as grand as Rosa and Emmett's but it will be ours."

She smiled; her cheeks fully red then. "I thought we would be stayin' with Rosa and Emmett for a good long while yet."

I shook my head. "I know ya love Rosa and Emmett, but I figured ya'd want your own kitchen and parlor and front porch? And once it's built, we'll send for your brothers so's they can make their home with us."

Her eyes grew even wider and she threw her food down on the blanket afore flingin' herself at me.

"Careful darlin'," I said as I laughed.

"Oh Ed, I wish more than anythin' to have a home of our own, and to have my brothers with us." She exclaimed as she grabbed tight 'round my neck, clingin' to me. "It's like ya know all the secret desires of my heart, and strive every day to make them come to be." She said while snifflin' into my shirt.

After we talked 'bout exactly what kind of house we wanted, and I assured her that it wouldn't be too close to the pond because she didn't want our children gettin' curious and fallin' in, we settled down and continued our meal.

But I warn't finished with my surprises.

"I've got somethin' for ya," I telled her after we'd sat quiet for a while.

She frowned at me. "Ed Cullen today is _your_ birthday. Ya ain't the one supposed to hand out gifts. I got a present for ya back at the house, I planned to give it to ya tonight, Rosa and me are bakin' a cake…"

I placed my fingers over her lips to silence her frettin'. After a moment, her lips turned up into a smile against 'em. "I didn't spend no money darlin'."

_Well, that warn't exactly true. I did send her brothers the money to mail the parcel…_

I pulled the cotton bundle from my pocket and held it in front of her. She give me a curious look and reached to unwrap it. There, lyin' against the fluff was her Ma's weddin' ring.

"I thought it was time ya finally had your ring Missus Cullen."

Izzy stared down at it, the tears flowin' down her cheeks. It was a while afore she could speak. "God's truth Ed, I love ya more than anythin' in this world." She said, chokin' back a sob while pickin' up the ring.

"Will ya put it on me?"

I nodded and smiled as I took the ring. After placin' a kiss on her finger, I slid it in place where it would stay until her dyin' day, afore takin' my wife in my arms and kissin' her soft lips.

Then, I recited out loud the words from my journal that I'd written the day after our weddin'. The words she'd finally read, and wept over, just a few days afore…

" _I can say for certain that I never felt true love until I found my Isabella, my wife, my dearest friend, my passion, the keeper of my heart. If the Lord would grant me one favor it would be to spend the rest of my days happily toiling beside my Izzy until the time comes for me to take my last breath. When I finally leave this world, it will be with the memory of her love and of the days spent together being the two greatest treasures I have ever, or will ever possess."_

_**~The End~** _

_**Two Epilogues and more to follow** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end of the story. *sniffle* 2 epilogues still to come. For those of you who read the first epi as written for the Fandom 4 Ovarian Cancer, you will want to read the one I post here because it will include some additions to the original.
> 
> Keep it on alert, because I may add a chapter from time to time even after both epilogues post.


	75. Epilogue 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wrap You in My Arms – Epilogue 1
> 
> Summary: It's been two years since Ed and Izzy made their eventful journey from Tennessee to Texas. It hasn't always been easy, but they've managed through love and hard work to carve out a life together in the old west. 
> 
> Many thanks to RomaSweet18 for her beta work on this! You are the best my dear!
> 
> Enjoy!

"Ed," I heared Izzy's worried voice callin' me from the back of the house, "I think it's time."

She didn't need to utter another word. We'd been expectin' this for a while now. Today was the day that our family was fixin' to grow larger.

Normally this warn't the type of thing to get me worked up, but Izzy's nervousness over the event had been wearin' on me. Even so, I was still right much calmer than her. Matter of fact, knowin' the state she was in, it were fair certain that she warn't gonna be of any help to me.

When I walked into the lean-to off the back of the house, I found her sittin' on the floor wringin' her hands.

I bent down and took her hands in mine, pullin' her up to her feet, "Izzy, I got this darlin', why don't ya go make us some coffee." It was still the middle of the night, so coffee was necessary in order to stay awake.

"Ya certain ya don't need me?" She give me a sad look afore glancin' to where Dixie was lyin' on a blanket.

"I'll call ya if'n I do. Try to keep Jack from frettin', alright?"

She give me a quick nod and a worried smile afore leavin' the room. I sat down beside Dixie and petted her head while talkin' to her in a soothin' tone. "How ya doin' girl?" The way she was strainin', I knowed it warn't gonna be long afore the first pup arrived.

Whereas Jack was Izzy's dog, Dixie was mine because she come to me. She wandered into the field one day while I was workin', and never left. Seemed she must have belonged to somebody, as tame as she was, but I could never find no one to claim her. So, she was my dog from that day.

Funny thing 'bout critters, when givin' birth, they mostly do all the work themselves through pure instinct. I was there if'n Dixie needed me, mostly to cut the cords once the pups arrived, but she did most everythin' else.

"Ain't nothin' in the world like havin' young-uns, Dixie," I whispered while she strained. "They can be the most frustratin', nerve-wrackin' little things in the world. But they's also this little miracle sent from the Lord that's a part of ya."

Just then, as if in affirmation of what I'd said, I heared Jacob let out a holler from his cot. That child could go from calm and quiet, to screamin' like a banshee, with no warnin' whatsoever.

He may have had my hair and my features, but he had Izzy's eyes and her fire.

I knowed that Izzy would be busy with Jacob for a while yet, so I turned my attention back to Dixie.

Maybe it was the fact that I was witnessin' the bringin' of new life into the world, but my mind kept goin' back to that day a year afore when my boy was born.

_*** Flashback ***_

" _I want Ed!"_

_I could hear my wife yellin' from our bedroom, while I paced the floor of the parlor. As soon as I heared the sound of her voice, I turned and started makin' my way toward her. A strong hand on my arm stopped me._

" _Ed, ya cain't go in there."_

" _The Hell I cain't Emmett. She's callin' for me. Ya ain't gonna stop me!" I pulled my arm away and moved at a quick pace toward the closed bedroom door._

" _Don't say I didn't warn ya, but those women are gonna throw ya out." Emmett's voice followed me down the hall._

_I didn't bother to knock, after all it was our bedroom; Izzy's and mine. When I opened the door, I could feel the glares that Rosa and Mary Alice sent my way, but I was beyond carin'. As soon as my eyes lit on my girl, and I seen that she was sufferin', there warn't nothin' in this world that was gonna make me leave that room._

_She was lyin' on her side, her skin flushed, while Rosa runned a wet cloth over her skin. Izzy looked over, and give me a pitiful smile. "Ed," she whispered. "the babe seems to be turned. Mary Alice says if I lie on my side it'll help."_

_I nodded and walked over 'til I was close beside the bed. Rosa studied me for a minute afore handin' me the cloth and basin. "Ya may as well be of some use."_

_I taked the cloth and wiped it over Izzy's forehead, afore bringin' it down to her neck. She shook her head, signin' me to stop. "Just sit and hold my hand, Ed. I wanna talk to ya."_

_I nodded and sat down in the chair beside the bed. She reached over and took my hand in hers._

" _Ed," she whispered. From the corner of my eye, I seen Mary Alice and Rosa quietly slip out of the room. Izzy just lay there quiet like, watchin' me. The only sound I heared was the tappin' of the raindrops outside the window._

" _It's cooler today," she said in a soft voice._

_I nodded. It was a fair spring mornin', and I'd learned to appreciate the rain whenever we was blessed with it._

" _Ed, I ain't said some things that need to be said."_

_My whole body froze as I waited for her to go on._

_She squeezed my hand a little then, in a comfortin' way. "I didn't bring it up, 'cause I know how ya feel… but it's time. Matter of fact, I've almost left it too late."_

_My chest felt tight, and it was suddenly gettin' hard to breathe._

" _Ed," Izzy whispered, her voice laced with worry. "I pray that it won't, but if somethin' happens, I don't want ya to grieve too sore."_

_No._

" _Izzy, I cain't think on it." It was true. If I stopped to think, I'd recollect how things was when my Ma died. My Pa near drove himself to distraction at the thought of bein' without her…_

_I knowed if I lost my Izzy, it would be worse… so much worse…_

_As if she could read my mind, Izzy spoke. "I don't want ya to be like your Pa or my Pap, Ed. I want ya to live, especially if this little one makes it through."_

_I started shakin' my head back and forth, not willin' to give answer to the notion._

" _Please, Ed. The babe is gonna need ya. Promise me."_

_I pressed my lips hard against her hand and closed my eyes. It was a known fact that I could refuse her nothin'. Afore I could form the words to answer, I took in a lungful of the cool air blowin' in through the open windows._

" _I'll promise if'n ya promise somethin'. For me."_

" _What is it?"_

_I opened my eyes and looked into hers. "Ya gotta promise to try your hardest not to leave me Izzy."_

_She nodded too quickly, and I stopped her._

" _No, Izzy. Ya gotta make a solemn promise that ya ain't gonna leave me. Even if everythin' in ya is tellin' ya to give up, I want ya to keep fightin'." I wiped a tear from my cheek. "Ya gotta find strength ya didn't know ya had, Izzy. Please…" I was lettin' the desperation I felt inside sound in my voice._

_She reached her free hand up and stroked the side of my face, wipin' away another tear. "I promise ya, Ed."_

_Izzy kept her promise._

_There was a time, after Mary Alice and Rosa was able to turn the babe that I thought Izzy's strength was goin' to fail. I made sure to stay right beside her and every time she seemed to weaken, she'd turn to me, squeeze my hand, and get a look of determination on her face._

_Finally, after a long, painful struggle, our son, our little Jacob named for my best friend, come into the world, hollerin' from the moment he took his first breath._

_*** End of flashback ***_

I sat back and smiled as Dixie nursed her pups. In the end, she'd birthed four. After they was cleaned up, I telled her with a laugh that she was lucky that only one of them took after Jack. I went outside to wash up and look for Izzy. She warn't far.

"Is it over?" she asked anxiously as she walked over to me with a laundry basket in her arms, and Jacob in a sling tied 'round her waist. I taked the basket from her. "It is. Four pups, all fit and nursin' as we speak."

She didn't say another word afore callin' Jack and skippin' toward the lean-to. As soon as she set Jacob on the floor, he reached up to me. "Pap!"

It was as hard to deny him, as it was to deny his Mam, so I picked him up and made my way over to Izzy. "Pap, Pap, Pap…" he babbled as he placed his hand on my cheek, earnin' a smile from his 'Pap'. I rubbed my hand over his reddish brown curls afore kissin' his round little cheek.

"Oh, Ed, I love 'em!" Izzy was almost squealin' as she watched the pups. She turned to smile at me and raised an eyebrow when she seen me holdin' Jacob.

"He's never gonna take his first step if'n ya pick him up every time he asks." It was true. Izzy was always fussin' at me for not lettin' Jacob alone when we was in the house. He was afeared of walkin' without holdin' on to somethin', and I knowed it was my fault.

"I cain't seem to tell him no." I admitted with a grin.

Izzy smiled and shook her head. "I suppose I wouldn't love ya as much, if'n ya could," She telled me afore walkin' over and kissin' me softly on the lips.

Jacob laughed and patted his Mam's cheek with his little hand. Izzy turned her head and captured his fingers in her mouth, playin' like she was bitin' him, earnin' squeals of laughter from our son.

_***WYiMA***_

Watchin' Izzy with Jacob made it hard to recall a time when we didn't have him with us. But the truth was he warn't yet a year old. And months before he come, Emmett and Rosa's little girl had arrived, preparin' us for what life was like with a newborn babe in the house.

The day she was born, and I heared Rosa screamin' from their bedroom like a cat on fire, I almost abandoned my brother and run off to work in the fields.

But knowin' how the memory of the day we lost Ma was likely eatin' at him, I couldn't, in good conscience, leave him by himself to face the unknown.

True to her promise, my Izzy stuck by Rosa and helped Mary Alice bring little Maria Sofia Cullen into the world. That child was a beauty to behold, with her dark hair, like her Ma, and bright blue eyes, like her Pa, and I made sure to tease my brother 'bout the day he'd have to fight the beaus off with a stick.

Emmett turned a little green at the thought, but was soon occupied with holdin' his daughter and softly kissin' her downy hair. In true Emmett fashion, he decided that _Maria Sofia_ was too big a mouthful for so tiny a child, and she became Sophie from that day on.

_***WYiMA***_

"Where's Jacob?" I asked as soon as Izzy appeared in the doorway to the barn where I'd pulled the wagon inside to unload it.

"Rosa took him to her house so's I could help ya. I'm countin' on him bein' wore out after playin' with Sophie, and maybe he'll sleep better tonight."

Jacob was cuttin' teeth and had been givin' us fits durin' the night. So much so, that by afternoon we was both draggin' at our chores.

"Izzy, ya do enough, ya don't need to be doin' my work to boot."

"Hush, Ed. I'll help ya, then you'll be done sooner and we can both have a rest."

We worked in silence, and afore I knowed it, the lumber and feed was stacked against the wall, the wagon was empty, and it warn't yet suppertime. Izzy's smile was wide as she climbed back up in the wagon.

"Izzy, what ya doin?"

"Do ya ever miss it, Ed?" She asked, ignorin' my question.

"Miss what?"

"Travellin' in the wagon; sleepin' under the stars," she said with a faraway look in her eyes.

"Sometimes," I telled her.

She looked sad as she traced her hand along the wagon seat afore sittin' down on it.

"I reckon we could always pull it out of the barn and spend the night in it." I said as I climbed up to sit beside her. "But I guarantee you'd be missin' our bed afore mornin'."

She giggled. "I'm sure that's true." She smiled and wrapped her arms around my middle. "It was excitin' though warn't it?"

"A might too excitin' at times Izzy." I frowned as I thought about the near misses we'd had afore reachin' Texas.

She nodded and sat against me, quiet like for a spell.

"Rosa brought a letter from Tennessee back from the tradin' post this mornin'. It was from Renie Black." Izzy had been correspondin' with Jacob's wife since they got hitched.

I looked down at her. "What did she have to say?"

Izzy bit her lip. "Well, ya know how she's best friends with your old flame _Ellie's_ sister, Sarah?"

"I wish ya wouldn't call her my old flame. Ellie ain't nothin' to me, past, present, or future."

"Ed, no matter what ya say, she was still part of your life."

I let out a huff and crossed my arms over my chest.

Izzy giggled and looped her arm through one of mine, makin' me relax 'em a bit.

"Anyways, Sarah telled Renie that Ellie is fair miserable in her marriage. It seems that her husband treats her like a child, and not like the woman of the house."

I frowned, not because I cared anythin' 'bout Ellie, but 'cause I didn't like to hear 'bout any woman bein' treated as such.

"He makes her call him _Mister Hatcher,_ even when they's alone. Even when they's _in bed._ " She whispered the last part and I could tell she was tryin' not to laugh. "Not that they share the same bed often, accordin' to Sarah."

"Shame on ya, Isabella Cullen," I said, decidin' to tease her, "Warn't ya the one who got right _indignant_ at the thought of menfolk gossipin' 'bout marital relations. And now you're listenin' to womenfolk doin' the same thing."

Her mouth fell open and a look of shame settled on her features. As I studied her, I couldn't help but let out the laugh I'd been holdin' inside.

That's when she narrowed her eyes at me. "Ed Cullen, stop your teasin'. I try my best to be a good Christian woman, but I cain't seem to help the feelins I get when I think of that _woman_ ya used to be sweet on." She said afore turnin' away and glarin' at the far wall.

That wouldn't do.

"I like it when you're jealous darlin'," I telled her while pullin' her against me and kissin' her on the nose. "Makes things right excitin'."

She frowned at me afore pushin' me away. "I don't like feelin' that way Ed, and I'm thinkin' I should punish ya for your teasin'."

I laughed louder then. "Punish me? I'd like to see that." I was still grinnin' when she jumped from the seat and stood over me, then she moved her legs 'til she was straddlin' my lap, and sat right down.

God's truth, all the air left my body in a single breath, I was that surprised.

Izzy reached her hand down and started rubbin' me through the front of my trousers. "I ever tell ya how much I like it when ya don't wear drawers?"

My mouth fell open, but it was hard to answer while her fingers was goin' to town on my pecker.

I leaned forward and kissed her sweet lips. "Izzy, ya is a wicked woman…" I managed to choke out.

"Hush and take your punishment." She grinned afore undoin' the front of my trousers.

As soon as she'd freed me from my prison, my pecker stood up straight and tall, hopin' the punishment didn't involve leavin' him unattended.

I needn't have worried 'cause my Izzy liked our joinin' just as much as I did.

I was a very fortunate man.

She stood up, still straddlin' me, and lifted her dress 'til it was up 'round her hips. I gritted my teeth when I felt her hand wrap 'round my pecker. "I ain't wearin' no drawers neither, and I been wantin' to do this all day," She whispered afore kissin' me hard and slidin' down, guidin' me with her hand, 'til I was all the way inside her.

As if the feel of Izzy surroundin' me warn't enough, she had to go and let out a little moan. I threw my head back and squeezed my eyes shut to keep from explodin'. "Girl, some day ya's gonna be the death of me," I telled her once I was able to speak again.

She smiled and touched her tongue to my lips, afore bitin' the bottom one.

 _Such a wicked woman.._.

After that, she rose up and slid down again, and I was the one moanin'. I reached up under her frock with both hands and grabbed onto her hips. Her skin was so soft, and she'd gotten a might rounder since birthin' Jacob. I loved nothin' more than runnin' my hands over her soft bare flesh, and Izzy took pleasure in my doin' it. I wondered if there'd ever come a time where we'd have our fill of each other.

It warn't likely.

"Oh Izzy," I said into her ear as she rocked against me. "I love ya so…"

"I feel right strongly 'bout ya as well _Mister_ Cullen," she telled me with a giggle, and the vibrations comed close to sendin' me over the edge. I gasped out loud at the feelin', and I knowed it wouldn't be long.

"Ya was made for me," I murmured into her hair, 'cause it was the God's honest truth.

I needed to touch more than just her hips, but there was no way I was gonna get the bodice of her frock undone without tearin' it, so I reached around and grasped her buttocks, grabbin' the flesh with both hands and usin' the strength of my arms to hurry her movements.

"Oh, oh!" she called as I felt her whole body startin' to quiver as her warmth closed tight 'round me. "Ed, oh, oh!" I watched her flushed face as she kept rockin' hard against me and made sure to keep thrustin' up to meet her as long as I could.

"Izzy," I moaned when I couldn't hold on any longer. She was moanin' right along with me, both of us a hot sweaty mess as we went over the edge together. It rarely happened at the same moment, but when it did, it was the sweetest feelin' of release imaginable.

We fell against each other then, my head restin' on her shoulder, and Izzy's arms draped loosely around me.

"God knows now I must truly be a good Christian woman," Izzy panted out.

I turned my head, still breathin' hard, in order to look at her face; her hair was messy and stuck to her forehead where she was perspirin'. "Izzy, you're the best Christian I know, but what are ya on about?"

"I must be a good Christian after all, 'cause I'm feelin' sorry for Ellie Hatcher."

I frowned, not understandin' her and not wantin' to think 'bout Ellie while I was joined with my wife. Izzy, reactin' to the look I was givin' her, spoke again, "Knowin' what I know 'bout her, she ain't never gonna feel what I do when ya hold me in your arms, and love me." She bit her lip as she thought. "So, I reckon there's no room for jealousy in my heart when what I'm feelin' now is pity."

"Izzy, there's lots of folks don't have what we do. " I said afore swiftly kissin' her lips.

"'Tis true," she smiled softly afore squirmin' on my lap, causin' my pecker to come to life again.

Izzy's eyes opened wide as she smiled, "Oh my. _Mister_ Cullen, I reckon you're what's referred to as _insatiable._ "

" _Missus_ Cullen, I see you've added another one of them five dollar words to your vocabulary."

"Cain't help that I like to read," she brushed her lips against mine afore she started rockin' her hips back and forth. And so began round two…

_***WYiMA***_

For days, Izzy had been watchin' the road leadin' to our place like a hawk. Just after supper one evenin' as we sat on the porch relaxin' with Jacob, she stood in a quick hurry, throwin' her sewin' aside, and let out a squeal.

"They's here Ed! Oh, Ed, they's finally here!" She screamed, startlin' Jacob and makin' him cry, afore takin' off like a shot, headed straight for the wagon that was lumberin' up the road toward us.

I picked up Jacob and we lit out after her. By the time we reached the wagon, it was stopped and Izzy was up on it with her arms wrapped tight 'round the necks of the two fellers seated there.

Her little body was shakin' and I could tell she was cryin' for all she was worth. "I feared I'd never see ya again," she whispered while her brothers wrapped their arms around her. They was all three cryin' tears of joy, and I was surprised to feel a tear trail down my own cheek as well while I watched 'em.

When she finally got done huggin' her brothers, Izzy picked up the corner of her apron and wiped the tears from her eyes, afore one of her brothers stepped from the wagon and turned to help her down. The other one followed after.

Izzy clasped a hand from each of them into her own and turned to face me. "Henry, Theo, this here's my husband Ed, and our boy, Jacob," She smiled brightly.

Izzy laughed when she realized she was holdin' tight onto their hands, and needed to let go so's I could shake 'em. Henry, the one just a year younger than Izzy was tall, almost as tall as me. He had the brown eyes of his sister, but his hair was a might lighter than Izzy's. Theo was four years younger than Izzy and his eyes and hair was darker than hers. He also had a complexion that was a little darker as well.

As I studied him, I thought how he looked more kin to Jake Black than Izzy, and I figured it was the Cherokee blood makin' it so.

Emmett and Rosa come over to help unload the wagon, and with so many hands we made short work of the chore. Izzy cried again as she unpacked a crate that held her Ma's handwork, and another that contained her dishes; but the thing that made her cry the most was her Ma's rockin' chair. She had me set it in the front parlor, directly in front of the window and commenced to rockin' as happy tears trailed down both her cheeks.

Jacob took an instant likin' to both his uncles, and as soon as he realized that walkin' would let him follow them around easier, we never had another moment's hesitation from him. Walkin' soon become runnin' and that led to fallin' down. A lot.

He was clumsy, but happy, 'cause there was always someone there to pick him up, and wipe away his tears.

We had a good life, and a happy one. Our family was all close by now, and Texas was comin' back from the war full tilt, so we was prosperin'.

I soon found out that Izzy's brothers were good, hard-workin' boys and with their help I knowed we'd be able to grow more wheat the followin' year.

Life seemed perfect until, at the end of the summer, there arrived somethin' new to fret about.

It all started when Izzy warn't actin' like herself. She had a worried look on her face most days, and sometimes, in the evenin', I would find her sittin' alone in the dark, just rockin' in her Ma's chair. She warn't happy or excited 'bout anythin' and all the light seemed to have left her eyes.

Everythin' come to a head when I woke durin' the night to find her weepin' beside me. I pulled her close and kissed her hair. "Izzy, if'n ya don't tell me what's ailin' ya, I'm gonna lose my mind."

"It ain't nothin' Ed."

"Don't lie to me darlin'. Ya ain't been yourself for days now. Ya pretend in front of the others, but ya cain't hide from me." I smoothed her hair back from her face afore kissin' her softly on the lips. "Please Izzy." I warn't above beggin' where she was concerned.

She looked up at me with her big beautiful eyes. "I'm expectin'," was all she said.

I just kept starin' at her, dumbfounded.

Izzy let out a breath and buried her face in my chest.

"That's why ya been upset?" I asked.

She nodded against me and I commenced to rubbin' her back.

"Why darlin'?"

"Last time… with Jacob… I reckon I'm just scared is all. I'm not ready to leave ya."

"Oh Izzy." I got choked up thinkin' 'bout how close I come to losin' her last time, "I'm so sorry darlin'. I try to stay away, I truly do, but it's near impossible…"

"Ed, don't ya start apologizin'. Ya ain't never forced yourself on me." She put her hand on my cheek in a comfortin' way. "I crave it same as you. I reckon I should be surprised that it ain't happened sooner."

I leaned into her. Rememberin' how things was with Jacob, I could feel a knot of worry formin' in my stomach. Despite that, there was somethin' holdin' me back from despairin' over our situation. "Darlin' I don't think the good Lord would've seen us through all the trials we've faced together, only to have us part now."

She looked up at me, snifflin'. "Ya truly believe that?"

I nodded. "I ain't got any proof, but I feel the truth of it in my heart." I wrapped my arms tighter around her. "I reckon He knows better'n anyone that I cain't bear to be without ya."

She smiled then, and I felt her relax against me. There was no sleep for us that night, both needin' the comfort that only joinin' together could bring. I made sure through whispered words and soft caresses that Izzy knowed exactly how much she meant to me.

She was my whole world.

Each day after that, I set aside some time durin' which I'd have a word or two with the Lord. First off, I'd thank Him for His many blessin's, namely Izzy, Jacob, and the new babe set to arrive at the end of winter.

Then I would spend a little time remindin' Him how I couldn't spare 'em.

Not one of 'em. But most especially my Izzy.

A wise man knows his strengths and his weaknesses, and when I pondered havin' to spend all the rest of my lonely days without my Izzy, the thought alone liked to crush my soul to dust.

I had no desire to live the life of Job even if it guaranteed me a place in heaven, and I made sure to tell that to the Man upstairs.

He must have been listenin', for Izzy was easily delivered of our second son a week afore her nineteenth birthday.

I stayed with her the whole time, just like afore, but this birth was different. Our Edward, for she insisted on namin' him that 'cause he looked so much like me, gave his mother not a bit of trouble neither afore, durin', nor after his birth.

"We got two strong boys, Ed. I reckon we gotta keep tryin' for that girl." Izzy give me a mischievous smile as she held the babe.

I knelt down beside the bed and took her hand afore kissin' it. "Ya ain't scared?"

She shrugged. "A woman would be a fool to not be scared when givin' birth, but I'm not gonna waste time worryin' needlessly. Besides, I reckon we make beautiful babies. Maybe that's our callin'." She said with a twinkle in her eye.

I raised an eyebrow and give her a sly look afore leanin' in and touchin' my lips to hers. "My darlin', I'm not opposed to doin' my duty and spendin' every wakin' moment on the _makin'_ of more babies with ya."

Izzy laughed. "Keep them pants on for a few more weeks yet, Mister Cullen. I didn't say I wanted to start today."

I laughed with her then and stared down at my new son, asleep against his mother's breast.

_Edward_

Our little Jacob and Edward would never be known as Jake and Ed. Izzy had said that they needed strong names to be able to endure life in the West, so we'd be callin' 'em by their full Christian names always.

Our life together was a good one, far better than what I ever could have hoped for when I set out from Robertson County Tennessee almost three years afore, and it was Izzy's love that had made all the difference.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **** Thanks for reading ****
> 
> One more epi to come, and it will be from Jack's POV. Should be fun. 
> 
> My good friend Cared is posting a review of WYiMA on the Rob Attack blog this Friday (July 6). You can find it under RobAttack dot wordpress dot com. I thank Cared sooo much for this and also for her lovely work designing the banner! Muah my dear!


	76. Outtake 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This outtake is a big thank you to everyone who voted for WYiMA to obtain a spot in the Top Ten Fan Fics completed in July 2012. WYiMA managed to snag 9th place.
> 
> *Happy birthday Lorraine!* 
> 
> Outtake: Takes place between Epilogue 1 and Epilogue 2. Enjoy!

** **

**Outtake 1**

" _Bob Roebuck is my sweetheart's name_  
He's off to the wars and gone  
He's fighting for his Nannie dear  
His sword is buckled on"

I could hear Izzy's sweet singin' as I come in from workin' the fields. It was soundin' from the direction of her vegetable garden. Through her efforts, we'd been treated to fresh butterbeans, squash, and black eyed peas all summer.

Henry let out a loud sigh as he walked beside me.

_"Oh if in battle he was slain_   
_I'm sure that I should die_   
_but I'm sure he'll come again_   
_And cheer my weeping eye_

_But should he fall_   
_In this our glorious cause_   
_He still would be my joy_   
_For many a sweetheart mourns the loss_   
_Of a Southern soldier boy"_

"I cain't do it Ed," Henry said in a hoarse whisper, lookin' like he was in pain. "'Specially with her singin' _that_ song."

"I reckon ya ain't got a choice, Henry." I said in a scoldin' tone. "That there gal is your sister, the closest thing ya still got to a Mam in this world, and she deserves to know what you're fixin' to do."

" _I hope for the best_  
And so do all  
Whose hopes are in the field  
I know that we shall win the day  
For Southerns never yield

_And when we think_   
_Of those who are away_   
_We'll look above for joy_   
_And I'm mighty glad_   
_That my Bobby is_   
_A Southern soldier boy"_

"After supper," Henry answered afore goin' to wash up at the pump.

_***WYiMA***_

"Izzy, I need to have a word with ya." Henry finally spoke up just as we was fixin' to clear the table after the meal.

Izzy nodded, a curious look on her face. "As soon as I'm finished with the washin' up."

"Darlin'," I interrupted, "Why don't ya leave the washin' up to Theo and me, so's Henry can talk to ya."

Izzy looked downright confused. "What ya needin' to say, Henry?"

"Let's step out on the porch, Sister; I've got some right good news to share."

Izzy nodded, but didn't smile as she followed Henry outside.

"What ya think she's gonna do to him?" Theo asked as he helped stack the dishes to be washed.

"Well," I paused, settin' down the ones I was holdin' as I thought 'bout it. "I reckon she might horsewhip him." I said with a grin, causin' Theo to laugh loudly, "or I suppose she could tell him she's proud of him and maybe kiss his cheek. But that ain't gonna happen."

Theo didn't have a chance to say nothin' more, afore we heared Izzy hollerin' from the direction of the porch.

"You're fixin' to what?!" She yelled, the shrill sound of her voice makin' the hair on the back of my neck stand on end.

_Oh Hell._

Me and Theo exchanged startled looks just as Jacob and Edward come scamperin' into the room and went to hide themselves under the table.

"Henry Swan," she was still yellin', "get that fool notion outta your head right now! Ya ain't joinin' the Yankee army!"

"I am, Izzy. I already done it." He answered; his voice almost as loud as hers.

The boy was either mighty brave or a whole lotta stupid.

"Then ya best go _undo_ it."

"I cain't. I'm reportin' for duty in four days."

The dead silence that followed his statement was worse than the hollerin'. I leaned over, peekin' through the dinin' room doorway just in time to see Izzy walk back inside, Henry followin' close behind her.

My gal's head was hangin' down and I was fair certain that she was cryin'.

"Izzy, I ain't doin' this to upset ya." Henry was speakin' softly now.

She stopped and looked up at her brother, her eyes shinin' with tears. I wanted nothin' more than to wrap my arms around her in a comfortin' way, but I thought it best to let them sort this out.

"Henry, I thought ya was happy bein' a farmer." She asked in a sad voice.

"I am _content,_ Izzy, but these last two years, I been spendin' time at the Fort, and I got a real hankerin' to be a soldier. I ain't gonna be happy 'til I see if it's the life for me."

Henry winced when Izzy give him a forlorn look. Out of the corner of my eye, I seen Theo gather up my young'uns and take 'em up the back stairs, where he was hopefully puttin' 'em to bed. They didn't need to witness their Mam's tears. No doubt they'd both start in to bawlin' as well.

"Henry, did ya ever think that some of them fellers was the same ones who maybe shot at our Pap durin' the war? They was tryin' to kill your own father, and ya's willin' to work side by side with 'em?"

"Izzy…" Henry said in a quiet voice.

"Alls I can say is I'm glad our Mam didn't live to see this day, for ya'd surely break her heart."

"Izzy, please…"

"I understand that as Christians we gotta be decent to our neighbors, even if they's _Yankees,_ but this is goin' too far, Henry Swan."

"Izzy, it ain't like that…"

"And Ed, did ya ever stop to think 'bout my husband? He's been nothin' but good to you and Theo, and you're makin' friends with the fellers that shot him and his brother." Her voice was startin' to rise in anger again. "How could ya be so heartless and cruel?"

"I'll admit that Ed didn't like the idea at first," Henry tried to explain, "but it warn't on account of the other fellers bein' Yankees so much as he wanted to warn be 'bout how hard the life of a soldier could be…"

Henry's voice trailed off as he eyed Izzy warily. Her face had suddenly lost all expression, and she'd gone right pale as she continued to stare at her brother.

I stepped into the hall, movin' closer as I worried that she might be fixin' to faint right there on the spot.

As soon as she sensed the movement, she whipped her head in my direction and her eyes come alight with a burnin' fire that scorched a path straight across the floorboards to where I was standin'.

I knowed for certain and for sure that if looks coulda killed, I'd a been a dead man.

"Ed Cullen," I opened my eyes wide as I took in her murderous expression, "Ya knowed Henry was fixin' to do this?" Her voice was low and cold.

"Uh…"

"Ya knowed, and ya didn't talk him out of it?"

"Uh…"

"Ya knowed, and ya didn't think to mention it to your _wife_?"

I didn't try to answer; instead I swallowed a big gulp of air and glanced at the front door wonderin', if'n I was to run, how far I'd get afore Izzy would catch me.

Soon as she turned to glare at Henry again, I bolted for that door and, by the skin of my teeth, made it to the safety of the porch. I felt right bad leavin' Henry behind, but this was one of them situations where it was every man for hisself.

Once outside, I stared back through the open door, and Izzy was nowhere to be seen. Henry made his way outside to join me. "Where'd she go?" I asked him.

He shrugged, lookin' worried 'bout what she may be up to.

Izzy was a might unpredictable sometimes.

The thought crossed my mind then that maybe she'd gone to fetch the shotgun and I reckoned I had just enough time to reach the barn afore she was able to fire off a round or two.

She reappeared then, and I silently thanked the Lord that all she was clutchin' in her hands was the broom.

She stomped outside and swung that broom back afore whippin' it around 'til it landed hard against my backside.

"Ow!" I couldn't help but yell; I was that surprised.

"Get off my porch, Ed Cullen. Ya ain't allowed inside, nor out here neither. Not you, nor you Henry Swan. Get your sorry asses away from me." She turned toward Jack who was standin' in the yard watchin' the goin's on with interest.

I reckoned if he coulda, he'd a been laughin' at me.

I made sure to give him a dirty look.

"Come on inside, Jack. Ya can sleep on Ed's side of the bed."

"Izzy, what the hell ya on about? Jack ain't allowed in the house, and ya ain't lettin' that varmint sleep in my place."

"The hell I ain't." She narrowed her eyes and held up the broom like she was gonna hit me again.

I jumped down from the porch, followed right after by Henry, so's we'd be out of Izzy's swingin' range.

"What am I supposed to do Izzy?" I shoulda been ashamed for whinin' like a child, but I warn't.

"Ya'll can sleep with the pigs for all I care!" With them words, she turned her back on us and stormed into the house. I stood starin' at the door, my mouth fallin' open in surprise when I heared the sound of the bolt slidin' into place.

I turned to glare at Henry. "Here I am, a growned man, locked outta my own house, and it's all your fault."

"My fault?!" Henry protested. "You're the jackass that kept secrets from your wife."

"It warn't my tale to tell, and who ya callin' a jackass?" I reached up and smacked the back of his head.

Henry responded by smackin' my shoulder.

Afore I knowed what was happenin', we was both smackin' the daylights outta each other; that was until one of us decided to throw the first punch. I ain't gonna say who done it, but it warn't me.

When we'd had enough of bloodied lips and rollin' in the dirt, we both started in to laughin', and soon after that, with our arms restin' on each other's shoulders, we retreated to the barn.

It was too early to sleep, so I pulled out the bottle of whiskey I kept hidden in the hayloft and we took turns drinkin' it.

"Ya know, your sister's right don't ya?" I decided one last time to let Henry know what he was in for.

"Ed, don't start no shit with me." Henry was a might drunker than I was by that time.

"Not 'bout the Yankees so much, but 'bout this bein' a bad idea. Ya ain't never killed nobody, Henry. It ain't a easy thing to do, nor to live with after."

His shoulders slumped as he stared at the bottle in his hand. "Ya ain't gotta tell me, Ed. It was the thing that held me back from enlistin' a year sooner than I did. Not knowin' if I had it in me to take the life of another man. But, I reckon once I'm with them other fellers, and it's kill or be killed, I'll find the will to do what I have to."

I nodded, 'cause that was just 'bout the way of it for those of us in the army. Them fellers ya spend every day with, well, they get closer to ya than your own brothers sometimes, and when it comes to defendin' them or yourself, ya tended to act on instinct.

When the bottle was empty, me and Henry made our way back over to the house, still findin' the door locked against us.

I was feelin' no pain by that time, so I walked around the side, towards the back where our bedroom was. I spoke loud enough for Izzy to hear me through the window. "Izzy, ya know ya shouldn't be treatin' me this way. I'll give ya another few minutes to let me in afore I'm leavin'. I'd sooner go stay in town than sleep in the barn."

I waited for her to answer. When she didn't reply, I went back to the barn and saddled my horse. Henry did the same, and half an hour later found us ridin' up Main Street.

Somehow, Henry talked me into havin' a drink at the saloon afore goin' to the boardin' house.

One drink turned into, I cain't recall how many, but I reckoned this was the only sendoff he'd be gettin' afore he left.

The saloon was packed with locals and a few cowboys who'd just got off the trail, their pockets full of their take from a recent cattle drive. The whiskey was flowin' and cigars was bein' passed around left and right. Some old feller was playin' the piano, and a couple of the bar gals was dancin' with the cow pokes.

We shared our news 'bout Henry's enlistment and congratulations sounded all 'round. One little gal who worked in the saloon made her way over to us, and seemed particularly interested in Henry, "Ya say you're joinin' up?"

"Yes, Ma'am," Henry answered. He warn't so drunk that he forgot to remove his hat.

"Ain't you sweet, my names Maeve and I certainly do _love_ a man in uniform. How 'bout a dance soldier?"

"Well, I ain't a soldier yet…" Henry was stutterin' and his face turned red, puttin' me in mind of his sister.

_Izzy._

I sure was missin' my Izzy.

That little gal commenced to gigglin' again and afore long she had Henry takin' her for a spin 'round the room. When they returned to the table, breathless and laughin', Henry sat down and that little gal plopped herself right down on his lap.

I reckon I looked almost as surprised as Henry at her forwardness, but I didn't have time to think on it afore another gal was sidlin' up to me, introducin' herself. "I'm Fannie," she telled me with a smile on her painted lips.

"How do." I answered, tryin' my best to be polite, drunk as I was.

When she placed her hand on my shoulder and let it slide down to my chest while she leaned in close, tryin' to speak into my ear, I sobered up right quick. 'Cause no matter what, I could never be drunk enough to forget I was a married man. And even though she mighta been mad enough to kill me, warn't no other for me, exceptin' my Izzy.

She owned me body and soul.

I reached up to push Miss Fannie's hand away, but afore I could, my attention was drawn by someone callin' my name. Even drunk, I knowed my wife's voice when I heared it.

I turned my head, and there she was, standin' in the doorway, her eyes trained on me. A beautiful, terrible vision she was as well; lovely and frightenin' all at the same time. It was the way I imagined that an avengin' angel would appear when sent by the Lord to smite the wicked.

She was glorious.

"Izzy," I whispered, as a drunken smile overtook my face.

Henry was so startled at the sight of his sister, that he jumped to his feet, dumpin' that little old gal, Maeve, straight onto the floor.

As he bent to help her up, Izzy commenced movin' toward us. It was then I noticed Emmett walkin' behind my wife, grinnin' from ear to ear like a fool.

"Don't ya say a word to me, Ed Cullen," Izzy snarled when she reached me, afore turnin' to face Miss Fannie, whose hand was still restin' on my chest. "And if'n ya know what's good for ya, you'll be removin' your hand from my husband."

I heared Miss Fannie snort out a laugh. "Seein' as it don't seem to be botherin' your _husband,_ I reckon I'll keep my hand right where it is."

Keepin' my eyes fixed on Izzy, I reached up and pushed Miss Fannie's hand away just like I planned to do a moment afore. I could see Izzy fightin' a smile at my gesture.

"Get up off your hind parts, Ed. We's goin' home."

I obeyed her immediately, while the gal who'd been on Henry's lap took off; hidin' herself on the other side of the room.

_Smartest thing she coulda done._

I threw some money down on the table as I wrapped my arm 'round Izzy's shoulders to lead her out.

"Ed and Henry, I'm a might hurt ya didn't ask me out drinkin' with ya," Emmett was smilin' so I knowed he warn't really hurt.

"Hush your mouth Emmett, and be thankful ya ain't in trouble like your brother."

Emmett laughed afore downin' what was left of me and Henry's drinks.

We hadn't reached the door afore Fannie shouted after us. "Maybe if ya was keepin' your man satisfied, he wouldn't need to go lookin' elsewhere."

At the sound of them words, the fire returned to Izzy's eyes, burnin' hotter than ever, as she turned to answer Fannie. "Well I reckon that's for him to say, if'n he's satisfied or not. Alls I know is that he's put three young'uns in me, and I suppose that counts for somethin'."

_Three?_

Fannie scoffed. "All that means is ya know how to breed."

I frowned at Fannie, she was dead wrong, and I aimed to tell her so. "Ain't no cause to go insultin' my wife like that Miss Fannie. Truth is this little gal here's the light of my life." I smiled down at my Izzy, and for the first time all night, she didn't look angry. The next words I spoke were true, but I knowed I never would a spoke 'em out loud if'n I'd been sober, "As for bein' satisfied, I don't know any man in all of Texas, maybe in all the world, who could be happier than I am. My Izzy gives me everythin' I need and more. Why, most nights I cain't get enough of bein' with her, it's like my body craves the feel of her warm skin against mine. The first time I seen her without her shift..."

"Ed!" Izzy exclaimed. I could hear Emmett laughin' but didn't pay neither of them no mind as I continued to speak, never takin' my eyes from Izzy's.

"I thought for sure she was one of them goddesses I heared tell 'bout in Greek mythology; all silky smooth skin and soft curves a man could lose hisself in…"

I didn't get to say another word afore Izzy's lips was coverin' mine, silencin' me. When she pulled back, I blinked several times as I felt the corner of my mouth pull up in a crooked smile.

"Ed, stop talkin', you're shamin' me in front of our brothers, ya drunken fool." The words shoulda come out angry, but her voice was soft and the smile on her lips telled me she warn't mad. Far from it.

"I love ya darlin'." I whispered.

"As I love you. Now let's get home."

"Get in the wagon, you two," Izzy demanded once we was outside. I looked over and was surprised to find me and Henry's horses hitched to the back of our wagon. I walked over to it, glad at the thought of bein' able to lie down.

Afore I did however, I grabbed my Izzy round the waist and pulled her toward me and away from the wagon, so's we was outta earshot of our brothers. "Ya ain't mad at me no more darlin'?"

She shook her head. "I reckon not."

She surprised me then by wrappin' her arms 'round my neck. "I missed ya in our bed."

I grinned down at her. "I reckoned ya was right upset, and I don't blame ya. But, ya have to understand that it warn't my place to tell ya Henry's business."

She nodded. "I understand, Ed. And I didn't mean all them things I said, 'bout Yankees, I was tryin' to think of anythin' that would keep him here. I finally got all my loved ones around me, and it hurts to think of losin' that." She sniffled as her eyes filled with tears.

"Oh darlin'," I pulled her against me. "Henry's a grown up man now, same age I was when I married ya. He's got to live his life. It don't mean he loves ya any less."

She nodded against my chest.

I chuckled then, rememberin' what she'd said to Miss Fannie. "I knowed ya warn't thinkin' straight when ya misspoke in there," I nodded toward the saloon.

"What ya on about, Ed?" Izzy asked, lookin' up at me with a curious expression.

I give her a wicked grin. "When ya telled Miss Fannie that I put _three_ young'uns in ya. Last time I counted we only had the two boys. But we can work on changin' that if ya like." I thrust my hips against her so she'd understand my meanin'.

"Huh," Izzy grunted afore quirkin' her eyebrow at me. "I telled the truth in there Ed, and ya don't need to work on nothin'. The deed's done, and if this night hadn't turned out the way it did I'd a been able to tell ya a lot sooner that I'm expectin' again.

I couldn't help but laugh out loud. This was a night we was sure to remember for a long time to come. I picked up my wife and spun her around, "Ed," she gasped out a laugh, "for heaven's sake, don't make me dizzy."

I set her down, still holdin' her close. "I love ya so much my darlin'."

She give me a bright smile then. "I love ya the same. Let's get home, I've a mind to let ya see what's under my shift." She telled me with a giggle and a wink.

My smile got even wider at her words.

I climbed into the wagon and lay back lookin' up at the sky filled with stars. I reckoned then that it would be easier to count the twinklin' points of light overhead than to try and give a number to the many blessin's that my beautiful Izzy had brought to my life.

God knows, I was a fortunate man indeed.


	77. Epilogue 2

**Jack's POV**

The afternoon sun felt good on my old bones. I hated to admit it, but I was beginnin' to feel my age.

I reckon that when my Izzy found me and took me in, I was already nigh on two years old so, addin' that together with the years since we'd been in Texas, I was thirteen now if'n I was a day.

Just lately I'd come to accept that it was a fair age for a dog to go to his final rest.

When the time come, I would go peaceful-like knowin' my family was in good hands. I'd learned my grandson to care for 'em, same as me and Dixie had. I'd telled him the stories of how we come here, so he'd know the value of them he was protectin'.

I was fair certain that Young Jack cared for 'em as much as me, though he was right partial to the young'uns, whereas my Izzy would always be the apple of my eye.

Still, he was a good feller, and truth be told he'd already taken over most of my duties, since sleepin' and eatin' seemed to take up most of my time here lately.

'Specially the sleepin'.

Dixie had passed on a year afore, so's I didn't mind goin' if it meant I'd be joinin' her in the hereafter. I'd heared the Mister say as much to my Izzy time and again when she was frettin' over me and my ills.

Even though I missed Dixie, it was gonna be a hard thing to part from my Izzy.

After all, it was my Izzy who loved me first…

I don't remember much of my life afore my Izzy. There are bits and pieces that I recollect from time to time where I was livin' with some old feller who just called me 'dog'. I reckon he got tired of me, 'cause one day he just set me loose in the middle of the town and left me to fend for myself.

After that, I become the town stray, beggin' for scraps, and tryin' not to get runned over in the street. Folks fed me, I reckon 'cause I warn't a vicious animal. But no one did any more than that.

Not 'til my Izzy.

That first day, she not only fed me, but she patted my head and rubbed my neck while speakin' soft words into my ear. When she asked 'bout my family, I'd never wished so hard that I'd been blessed with the gift of human speech, so's I could let her know that I was all alone in the world.

I reckon my Izzy seen the desperation in my eyes though, 'cause she telled the Mister that she was keepin' me. Even if he had forbid it, I knowed for true that I'd a paid him no mind and followed that wagon all the way to Texas.

I was brought from my musin's by the sound of my grandson's loud bark. I poked my head up from where I was lyin' in the grass to find Emmett pullin' his wagon close up to our house and helpin' Miss Mary Alice to step down from it.

Just then, the Mister come runnin' out gesturin' wildly with his hands. Knowin' that Miss Rosa was already inside, I could only suppose that Miss Mary Alice had been fetched to help bring my Izzy's newest arrival into the world.

I stood from where I'd been restin', and give myself a good shake afore makin' my way towards the house.

This would be babe number five for my Izzy. Lord knows the way she and the Mister was always pawin' at each other, it were a wonder they ain't had more afore now…

That thought had me recollectin' the days spent in the wagon. I'd seen them two nekked and sweatin' more nights than I'd care to recall while on that trail. Once we arrived in Texas, I was more than grateful that they finally had a roof over their heads and four walls around 'em, so's I wouldn't be witness to their private time no more.

Although, I had to admit that, when the windows was open, I was still privy to the sounds they would make when they got goin'.

Truth was, I didn't mind so much. Not if'n it meant we could add another young'un to the four sons that my Izzy had already birthed.

Good boys, every one of 'em, and they made their parents proud every day.

Speakin' of which, when I reached the porch I found all the boys standin' there watchin' their Pap with worried looks on their faces. Jacob, who was ten years old now was holdin' fast to the hand of his littlest brother, Peter, who had just turned three. Young Edward and the other boy, Frederick, stood to the side. The sight of their solemn faces liked to cause my old heart to pause in its rhythm, and I immediately started in to worryin' 'bout my Izzy.

I watched as Emmett carried Miss Mary Alice's daughter from the wagon and took her inside the house. The boys followed silently. "Look after her, would ya Edward?" Emmett directed while pointin' to the little girl.

Yes indeed, it was a right happy day when Miss Mary Alice announced that she was expectin', 'specially for the womenfolk.

Little Isabella Rose Whitlock, named for Miss Mary Alice's two very best friends, become a particular favorite of young Edward from the first day he laid eyes upon her, and in the two years since her birth, the bond between 'em had only grown stronger.

I watched as young Edward took little  _Bella_ by her hand and led her into the parlor where the menfolk had gathered. The Mister was so distracted with tellin' his brother how my Izzy was farin' that he took no notice that I'd slipped into the house with the others.

I warn't usually allowed inside, it was a strict rule of his, but my Izzy had been known to break it now and again.

I waited and watched from the shadowy corner by the front door, as the Mister sat down in a chair and dropped his head into his hands. "The babe ain't supposed to come yet," he said, practically chokin' on his words as his boys gathered close beside him. "She's in terrible pain and she's tellin' me that it ain't like none of the others." While he talked, he wrapped his arms tight round the shoulders of his young'uns, pullin' 'em close.

So caught up was I in worryin' 'bout my Izzy, that I barely noticed Emmett's brood trampin' through the door 'til they was practically steppin' on me. Theo had gone to tell 'em 'bout my Izzy, and instead a waitin' at home for news, Sophie had led 'em all here.

They loved their Aunt Izzy, that was for certain.

I kept my eyes on the Mister while Emmett took to fussin' at his young'uns and tellin' 'em to go home. The Mister's eyes kept driftin' to the hallway and I knowed it warn't gonna be long 'til he found his way back to my Izzy's side.

Soon as he stood and started makin' for the bedroom door, I followed quietly.

"Ed," I heared Miss Mary Alice say as soon as he crossed the threshold. "The babe's in a difficult way." I peeked into the room and seen my Izzy tossin' her head back and forth against the pillows. I could feel a whimper tryin' to escape me, and swallowed hard in order to force it back, knowin' that if'n the Mister was to hear it, I'd be tossed outdoors for sure.

"Is it like it was with Jacob?" the Mister asked in a low voice, so low that my old ears had a hard time hearin'.

Miss Mary Alice shook her head. "This one's breech. I'm gonna try to turn it, but I gotta warn you that it's gonna be painful."

"She'll be alright won't she?"

Miss Mary Alice drawed in a breath, hesitatin' for a moment, then I saw her place her hand over where his was clasped together in front of him, like he was prayin. "Ed, I've never lost a mother, and I don't intend to start now. Especially not Izzy."

Prayin' sounded like a right smart thing to be doin' just 'bout now.

Needin' to be close by, I waited 'til the Mister had his back to me, and then I slipped quietly into the room. Once inside, I hid in the corner behind the skirt to my Izzy's dressin' table, and waited.

What I witnessed over the next few hours liked to have broke my heart. Miss Mary Alice and Miss Rosa pushed and prodded and moved my Izzy this way and that, workin' over her little body in an effort to turn the babe. My Izzy kept quiet, but the pain she was feelin' showed clear as day on her face.

The Mister liked to tear his hair out by the roots as he sat by, his eyes never leavin' hers.

The expression that crossed his features was one I'd only witnessed once afore in all the time I'd known him. It was the way he looked when James Forrest kidnapped our Izzy and we discovered him holed up in that train car.

That was the day the Mister showed me what he was made of, and I was damned proud to call myself a Cullen from that time on.

I remember bein' so angry at what that no count Forrest done to my Izzy, that even after the Mister had killed him, I had the overwhelmin' urge to sink my teeth into his flesh again. What I wanted most was to rip his pecker from his lifeless body and feed it to the crows.

I sucked in a breath of air and studied my Izzy again. She was lyin' quiet now, restin', and I was fair grateful for it. The Mister looked as wore out as she did.

I must a dozed off, 'cause next thing I knowed I was awoken by the sound of my Izzy and the Mister talkin' in low voices.

"Ed, if'n I don't make it, ya will send word to Henry. Tell him that I love him." My Izzy rasped out the words and I suddenly felt like I was gonna be sick right there on the floor.

Henry was a good man and a right good farmer, but after the Fort was up and runnin', he discovered his love for soldierin'. It was right hard for my Izzy and the Mister to accept the sight of him the first time he donned that blue uniform, but after a while it grew on all of us. Henry was happy, and that was what mattered most.

After a couple of years in the army, he met a gal while assigned to a fort down south, and they married. Last letter we got announced the birth of their second child.

Henry was gonna be hard put upon if somethin' were to happen to my Izzy.

As would we all…

I couldn't think on it…

"Ed, did they ever catch Nacoma?" My Izzy asked, her words a might slurred. "Oh now, what am I sayin', of course they did… The poor feller, all he wanted was a hot meal…" She sighed afore driftin' off to sleep again.

"It's the pain makin' her talk so," Miss Mary Alice telled the Mister while she patted his shoulder in a comfortin' way.

The Mister, lookin' paler than I'd ever seen, just sat there pattin' her hand. Every now and then he'd lean down to place a soft kiss on her forehead or lips.

I couldn't let the thought into my head that my Izzy might not make it. The three of us had endured worse than this and, even though my time was nearly up, it warn't right for my Izzy's to be.

Not yet…

I felt myself driftin' to sleep again, but my Izzy's words was still soundin' in my ears, causin' my dreams to be filled with the memory of the last time I seen Nacoma…

_There was a time back when Jacob and Edward was little, afore the birth of Frederick, that a band of renegade Indians had taken to travellin' 'round our part of Texas, hell bent on burnin' settlers out of their homes._

_Me and Dixie was on high alert, bound and determined not to let them rascals hurt our family._

_The army needed a local who knowed the lay of the land and called on Mister Jasper for help in trackin' the renegades. Since he was goin' to be gone for some days, Jasper moved Miss Mary Alice in with us 'til he was able to return…_

_Three days later, we was caught unawares when a group of five Indians showed up just afore suppertime. The Mister and my Izzy's brothers was off workin' in the fields._

_Afeared to leave her young'uns, my Izzy whispered low in my ear that I had to run as hard and fast as I could to fetch the Mister. I don't reckon I ever run so fast. The Mister, God bless him, knowed by the sound of my barkin' to come without hesitation._

_Imagine our surprise when we arrived back at the house and found all them Indians sittin' on the porch, eatin' our victuals, and bein' given a proper tongue-lashin' by my Izzy._

_The Mister looked as bewildered as Miss Mary Alice as he stood by, just watchin'._

" _Now, Nacoma, I know ya got issue with the army and with the government. I don't think much of them fellers myself, but all these folks ya been hurtin' ain't doin' ya no harm. Ya should be right ashamed of yourself. Don't ya fear the Lord?"_

_Nacoma was eatin', but it was obvious he was listenin' to my Izzy, 'cause his eyes was shinin' with amusement. He didn't answer._

" _Well whether or not ya believe, ya ought to be fearin' His wrath right 'bout now…"_

_The Mister finally interrupted her. "Nacoma," he said with a nod of his head._

_Nacoma stood. "Ed Cullen." He said in answer._

" _When ya've finished eatin' I think it best that ya'll be on your way." The Mister was frownin' deeply._

_Nacoma nodded and signaled to the others that it was time to go._

" _And don't ya be burnin' out none of our friends or neighbors!" My Izzy exclaimed after them while they was mountin' their horses._

_Nacoma turned to face her and nodded once afore ridin' away._

_That was the last we ever seen of him, but got news afore the year was out that the army had cornered him and his men several miles north of us. Nacoma warn't 'bout to let them capture him alive though. He fought to the death._

I was woken this time by the sound of Rosa's voice. "Thank the Lord, the babe's turned, help me move her Ed."

I could see her tryin' to help my Izzy to sit up, while the Mister lifted her 'til he had her propped back against the pillows.

From my spot beside the dressin' table, I couldn't rightly see what happened next, but it warn't long afore I heared the wail of a newborn babe. When I seen Miss Mary Alice wrap that young'un in a blanket and hand her to the Mister, and I seen my Izzy reach for them both, I knowed that everythin' was gonna be fine.

I felt my body sag with the relief of it all.

Miss Mary Alice and Rosa fussed over my Izzy for a spell longer afore leavin' the room so's the new babe could have some time with her Mam and Pap.

"Molly Belle Cullen," my Izzy stated in a clear voice, "that's what I want to call her, Ed."

The Mister was too overcome with emotion to speak as he kissed his baby girl on the head and handed her off to her Mam. "God's truth I love ya darlin'," he telled her in a hoarse voice. "But it's been a long time since I was that fearful of losin' ya." He said as he wrapped his arms 'round both mother and child, unashamed of the tears trailin' down his cheeks.

She pulled his face to hers while holdin' the babe close against her. "I ain't goin' nowhere, Ed. Ya's stuck with me for many years to come…"

Her words only served to make him drop his head and cry harder into her shoulder, while my Izzy run her hand soothin'ly across his back.

Once his emotions was settled, my Izzy kissed him softly on the lips. "Bring the boys in to meet their sister."

The Mister's smile was blindin' then as he stood up. After bendin' to kiss my Izzy one more time and runnin' his hand over the brown curls on the top of Miss Molly's head, he left the room in order to fetch the boys.

Soon as he was out of sight, my Izzy turned her attention to me. "Ya can come out now, Jack." She reached for me, signalin' that I should come closer.

Once I was standin' beside her, she patted me on the head. "Sorry I give ya a fright, boy" she whispered, and I closed my eyes as I nuzzled against her hand. "For true, I give my own self a fright this time."

I looked up at her, not rememberin' a time when she looked so tired. Even so, she was fair glowin' with love for the new babe in her arms. "Ain't she just the most precious thing Jack?" She asked while turnin' the babe so's I could see her little face.

She was a might purty babe, and I knowed that if she growed up to favor my Izzy, she'd be beautiful indeed.

My Izzy began to rub my neck then. "Ya been such a good friend to me, Jack. The best friend anyone could ever wish for. Ya seen me through some bad times, and ya been here to celebrate the good." My Izzy took in a shaky breath. "I know the time's comin' for ya to leave us."

I seen her eyes tear up, causin' me to turn my head and whimper against her hand.

"I love ya boy, but I understand, and I'm sorry I been right selfish wishin' ya could stay forever." She sighed and wiped her eyes with her hand afore reachin' for me again. "I want ya to know that I've made my peace with the notion, and when the time comes, I don't want ya hangin' on just for my sake."

I licked her hand, hopin' she knowed that I understood.

Just then the boys and the Mister come trompin' into the room. They was tryin' to keep quiet, but they  _was_  boys after all. The Mister, who was carryin' Peter, actually patted my head and didn't look put out that I had snuck into the house.

"There ya are boys, your baby sister Molly Belle, and ain't she a beauty to behold, just like her Mam." The Mister had a silver tongue when he had a mind.

I watched as he leaned down to kiss my Izzy again afore all them boys started in to lovin' on that babe and their Mam.

I took that moment to quietly slip away from 'em, stoppin' in the doorway to look back and study the faces of them that were dearest to my heart.

Never did I think all them years ago when my Izzy rescued me from the streets of Jackson Tennessee, that my life would end up like this.

I come into this world without a single soul carin' whether I lived or died. But when it was time to leave, I knowed I'd leave surrounded by the love of my family.

My Izzy's eyes met mine, and she give me that special smile, like always. I turned to go. I had a hankerin' to watch the sunrise, knowin' that I wouldn't be around to witness too many more of 'em…

~THE END~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sniffle* I love Jack. And yes, in his mind her name ain't 'Izzy' it's 'My Izzy'. I love his furry little butt.
> 
> The two youngest boys are named for Ed friends who died during the war. (Frederick and Peter).
> 
> I think if the government back then had employed someone like Izzy, she could have solved any problems with the Native Americans in a month's time. Just sayin'.
> 
> Also, Alice and Jasper's little girl (Isabella Rose) is called Bella, and yes Ed and Izzy's Edward is already quite attached. : ) This was absolutely intentional because I have a plot bunny for a future story/sequel percolating in my little brain. Stay tuned.


	78. The Future - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer- Stephenie still owns the usual suspects.  
> I own my original characters and original story.
> 
> Because I love the 'drabble-ish' feel of this story, I wanted to continue that. Therefore, I've split the Future Take into 3 parts. 
> 
> **Angst ahead. Tissue warning for part 1
> 
> Enjoy!

****

**The Future, Part 1**

**Spring, 1881**

My Ma always used to say that the Good Lord warn't never gonna send ya a cross greater than ya was fit to bear.

As I stood beside the slumped form of my brother, my hand on his shoulder offerin' what comfort I could, I doubted those words for the first time in my life.

Scarlet fever was the name of the demon that come and stole little Joseph from the lovin' arms of his Ma and Pa, leavin' Emmett to weep over the grave of his youngest child.

After the priest done said his piece, I'd sent everyone else back home. Emmett needed to grieve, and I reckoned he didn't want none of his other young'uns, nor mine neither to bear witness to the sight.

It was a good long while afore his tears run dry. For a time after that, I sat beside him on the grass, both of us lost in silent contemplation.

It was a bitter pill, havin' to give one of your own back to the Lord. A pill I'd never had to swallow myself, and prayed I never would.

Little Joseph had only been with us for four short summers, but that child had taken up a special place in everyone's heart. He was a happy go lucky little feller, and there warn't a day went by that he didn't have a smile on his sweet face; so much like his Pa in every way.

"Ed, ya know all them books that our Pa was so fond of porin' over when we was small?" He shook his head to clear his thoughts. "Course ya know, ya got half the lot at your house, just like I got the rest at mine…" He stopped to take in a shudderin' breath. "I reckon ya could search them books and find the saddest story ever recorded inside, and the sorrow them folks was feelin' couldn't touch what I'm carryin' now."

I could feel my own eyes brimmin' with tears at his words.

"I finally understand what it's like to have my heart broke in two."

I swallowed back the lump in my throat. "Brother, ya gotta pull yourself together for the sake of your wife. She's gonna need ya to be her strength in the time ahead."

I watched as he nodded slowly.

"Ya got other young'uns to care for as well, two of 'em lyin' abed with the same sickness that's already done took too much."

He turned toward me, the worried look he'd been wearin' for days returnin' to his face. "I gotta get back." He pushed up from the ground and stood on shaky legs. I stood and grabbed ahold of his shoulder to steady him. "My little gals is sick, Ed. I gotta get back to the house."

There'd be time later to grieve Joseph's passin'. The way I seen it, that little feller was at peace in the arms of his Granny in heaven.

It was the livin' that needed our attention now.

Truth be told, Rosa and Izzy never made it to the funeral. Rosa wouldn't leave the side of her sick little gals, and Izzy wouldn't leave Rosa.

Emmett and Rosa's two eldest, Sophie and Alexander, had been spared the fever, as had all of mine, but Emmett's other daughters, Elena and little Esmeralda, had been laid low with it, even afore Joseph had begun ailin'.

When the fever come upon him, it was swift and merciless. Despite the best efforts of his Ma, Izzy and Mary Alice, whose years of learnin' as a nurse was brought to bear; in the end, his little heart just give out on him.

Warn't nothin' to be done for it.

Mary Alice cried the bitterest tears of any of the womenfolk as Emmett and I bore Joseph's body away.

_**WYiMA**_

Izzy greeted us at the door. "It's done?" She asked me in a solemn whisper once Emmett had rounded the corner toward the girls' room.

I nodded and watched as she closed her eyes, a single tear escapin' and trailin' down her cheek.

"The little gals is doin' better, their fevers finally broke, thank the Lord." She said, lookin' up at me with weary eyes.

I breathed out a sigh of pure relief afore pullin' her against me, needin' her warmth. Izzy's little form relaxed into my embrace, and there we stood 'til my brother appeared again, the worry on his brow a might less than afore.

Izzy had us both set down and placed cups of strong coffee in our hands.

"Thank ya, Izzy." Emmett telled her as he grabbed ahold of her arm. "For everythin'."

I could tell that Izzy was close to breakin' down when she patted Emmett's hand with hers. "We's family, Emmett." She telled him with a tremblin' lip. "God knows that me and Ed love your young'uns like our own. I helped bring 'em into the world didn't I?"

Emmett nodded; his eyes showin' the depth of his sorrow.

And that was the moment that my gal finally succumbed to her grief.

I knowed she was recollectin' all the times she'd helped birth Rosa and Emmett's children, and how today, we'd had to bury one of 'em in the cold earth.

I stood and caught her afore she collapsed, and for the next little while held her on my lap, lettin' her sob into my neck.

I didn't notice my brother had gone 'til I looked over and found his chair sittin' empty.

"Ed," Mary Alice's soft voice drew my attention a short time later, "The girls are much better. Why don't ya take Izzy home so she can rest?"

Izzy stirred. "Mary Alice, I ain't leavin' ya here to do all the work."

"There isn't anything more to do, honey. I'm gonna sit with the girls while Rosa rests, then I'm going home as well."

_***WYiMA***_

It was late afternoon by the time we left Emmett's and crossed the fields which led to our house.

We'd just made our way past the pond when I noticed a figure comin' toward us. Fear clutched at my heart when I seen that it was our boy Jacob runnin' like his life depended on it. Soon as he reached me and his Mam, he stopped to catch his breath, "I was comin' to fetch ya."

"Son, what's happened?"

"It's Frederick. He's right poorly, Pap. His face has gone all red and his forehead's hot to the touch."

My whole body went rigid at the sound of them words. It was how the fever began with Emmett's young'uns, and I'd been dreadin' for days to hear that one of my own had been stricken.

I'd almost forgot 'bout my poor wife 'til I heared the low keenin' sound comin' from beside me. I turned toward Izzy and found her clutchin' at her throat. I was afeared that maybe she was gonna faint there on the spot and reached out for her.

My Izzy was always one to surprise me though. With my arm 'round her shoulders, I studied her face as she stood starin' in the direction of our home. In the span of two heartbeats, her look changed from frightened to stern, as she set her jaw like she was fixin' for a fight.

"Jacob, I want ya to go to your Uncle's. Miss Mary Alice is still there. I need ya to tell her what ya just telled your Pap and me. She'll know what to do."

"Yes, Mam." Jacob lit out across that field like a shot, just as Izzy grabbed hold of my arm. "Ed, we's gotta hurry."

When we reached the house, Izzy made quick work of gettin' Frederick put to bed, spongin' him down first to work against the fever. Within the hour, Peter was also showin' signs of the sickness.

We sent Sophie and Alexander back home. There warn't nothin' they could do at our house, and them two young'uns needed the comfort that only their own Ma and Pa could give 'em after sufferin' the loss of their little brother.

When Mary Alice arrived, she insisted that our Edward bundle up Molly and take her to her house.

"Mary Alice, what if she gets the fever? Your little gal's kept well so far and…"

"Izzy, if Bella gets the fever then it was meant to be." She give Izzy a long, hard look. "However, if Molly stays here, she is certain to catch it. My house is the only chance she has."

I swallowed down the lump in my throat as I watched Izzy throw her arms around her friend's neck. "Thank ya."

"No need to thank me, you would do the same."

Izzy give her a teary smile and nodded. "I would."

I kissed my baby girl goodbye afore she left with her brother, sayin' a prayer that she would continue to be spared.

We worked through the night, keepin' vigil mostly. When Mary Alice stood and began to sway on her feet, Izzy and me insisted that she go home and get some rest. She relented, knowin' that she warn't no good to anyone, the state she was in.

"I'll be back tomorrow." She declared afore gatherin' her things so's I could take her home.

"Mary Alice, ya got your own to care for." Izzy said in a weary tone.

"Izzy, I have a very understanding husband, and don't forget that I also have help. Carmina loves Bella as much as we do."

It was true.

There was no denyin' that the Whitlocks, although great friends to me and Emmett's families, was above us in social standin'. It was just the way of things.

They was well-off enough to afford servants to help with the runnin' of their home. Carmina had been with 'em since afore the birth of little Bella and all our young'uns thought the world of her.

"But now she's got the care of mine as well…"

"She loves Molly too, so stop frettin'." She give Izzy one last hug and followed me outside.

"Ed," she said once we arrived at her home and I helped her climb down from the wagon. "Keep a close eye on Peter. I don't worry so much about Frederick since he's bigger and stronger, but Peter will have a more difficult time."

I nodded; a little piece of my heart splinterin' and fallin' away at the thought of my boy not makin' it through this.

_***WYiMA***_

The days that followed turned out to be some of the hardest I'd ever endured in my near thirty-five years on this earth.

Watchin' my sons toss and turn as they fought agin an invisible evil that was hell bent on takin' 'em from us, almost did me in. Not to mention what it did to their Mam.

Frederick was the first to show signs of improvement, but neither me nor Izzy had time to celebrate on account a Peter takin' a turn for the worse.

If it hadn't been for Mary Alice, I knowed for certain and for sure we would have lost our son. When the fever spiked, and his body started in to shakin', she stripped off his clothes and had me lower him into a tub of lukewarm water.

By the time he was back in bed, the fire in his skin had lessened, and sometime durin' that night, the fever broke altogether.

"He's resting quietly now, the worst has passed," Mary Alice said, just as the first light of dawn showed itself over the horizon.

Some time later, my eyes was drawn away from the sight of my sleepin' children when Mary Alice sighed and drew a hand across her brow. "Unless ya need me, I believe I'll head on home now."

My brother, who'd stayed with us through the long night, rose from his chair. "I'll take ya, Mary Alice."

"I'd be much obliged, Emmett." Mary Alice answered afore turnin' back to me and Izzy. "These two boys are gonna need sleep more than anything else now. You should try and get some as well."

Izzy shook her head, "Ed will come to fetch Molly directly."

"Izzy, honey, let her stay with us for a few days. These here will need ya while they regain their strength."

Izzy's shoulders slumped, "Ya sure it ain't no trouble?"

Mary Alice give Izzy a weary smile. "Molly's an angel. She's no trouble at all, besides Bella loves having a playmate."

My gal smiled gratefully afore givin' her friend a fierce hug. "Thank ya kindly, Mary Alice. God's truth we'd be in a sorry state without ya."

I couldn't help but give Mary Alice a hug of my own, I was that grateful for the part she'd played in savin' my boys.

The tears come then, but they was happy ones.

"Get some rest," Mary Alice directed afore turnin' toward the door.

Emmett wrapped his arms round both me and Izzy afore settin' out.

My head was swimmin' with the memory of havin' to bury little Joseph just a few days afore, but I knowed there warn't nothin' I could say to ease my brother's heartache...

Who could reason out why the Lord seen fit to take one and spare another?

Izzy's faith had always been stronger than mine, but in the years since we'd wed, she'd taught me to put my trust in the Almighty. It was all I could do now.

_***WYiMA***_

Sometime later, with Mary Alice's words still ringin' in my ears, I collapsed onto our bed.

The gal I married, stubborn as always, had refused to join me, and I found that I was too wore out to argue with her.

Frederick and Peter was still sleepin' when I awoke sometime later to find Izzy dozin' in a chair beside their bed.

I didn't have the heart to lose my temper when I seen that Young Jack had crawled between my boys, and was fast asleep, close by Peter's side.

That dog had a fierce attachment to my young'uns, 'specially Peter. It put me in mind of the great affection that his granddaddy Old Jack always held for Izzy.

I sighed thinkin' 'bout that old mutt. We couldn't have asked for a more loyal friend. He'd seen us through the good times and the bad. It had been more than two years since his passin' and my heart still bore the weight of it.

"Ed?" Izzy murmured as I lifted her from the chair.

"I'm here, sweet girl." I whispered against her hair. "I'm just puttin' ya to bed."

Izzy was as weak as a newborn kitten, but still tried to struggle in my arms. "I wanna be here when they wake."

"Ya need a proper sleep, darlin'. I'll set a spell with the boys and the minute they stir, I'll come fetch ya."

She breathed in deep and closed her eyes; her will losin' the battle over her tired body.

_***WYiMA***_

By the look of things, I knowed there'd be no leavin' the house for the rest of the day. As much as my fields needed tendin', Izzy and my young'uns had to come first.

Always.

Theo and my eldest boys, God bless 'em, had been handlin' a fair portion of my chores for the last few days, just as Jasper had been doin' for Emmett.

So, despite the many hardships, the Almighty had also provided family and friends to help ease our way.

Maybe my Ma had been right after all…

_***WYiMA***_

Frederick was the first to open his eyes. "Pap?" His voice was low and sounded a might rough from bein' silent for so long.

I stood from the chair and was at his side in the blink of an eye, not able to hold back the joyful tears at the sound of my name on his lips. "I'm here, my boy." I telled him while brushin' the wayward hair off his forehead.

After a sip of water, he started in to talkin' a little, his mind seemed right muddled 'bout what all had happened.

"I was havin' some fearful dreams, Pap." He was silent for a time afore speakin' again. "Did we, I mean, did Joe really _die,_ or was I dreamin' it?"

I wished I coulda given any answer other than the truth, but a lie warn't gonna serve no purpose in the long run.

"Sorry to say it, son. That warn't a dream. Joseph's gone to heaven." I whispered the words, "Ya took sick just after the funeral."

At nine years old, my Frederick was always tryin' hard to prove he was a man. His favorite pastime was followin' his older brothers and cousin around, pretendin' and wishin' he was just a might older than he truly was.

But at that moment, my brave boy held the look of a small lost child. He wept into his pillow while I rubbed soothin' circles on his back. "I didn't want it to be true, Pap."

"I know."

When he turned over to find his little brother lyin' beside him, still in a deep sleep, he stopped cryin'. "Pap, is Peter ailin'?"

"He was."

Frederick sniffled. "He ain't gonna die too, is he?"

"No, Frederick. The danger's past."

My boy took a deep breath. "He's gonna take the news 'bout Joe hard."

I nodded, wonderin' how much Peter would remember. Bein' three years younger than Frederick, I doubted he'd recollect much; even the passin' of his best friend, 'cause that's what Joseph was to him.

Seemed like from the time Joseph learned to walk, him and Peter was always together. Durin' daylight hours, ya was hard pressed to see one without findin' the other close by. It amused my brother so much that he'd taken to callin' 'em 'Pete' and 'Repeat' instead a their proper names.

My heart started in to hurtin' all over again at the memory.

"I gotta get your Mam. I promised to wake her when ya opened your eyes."

The happy smile on Izzy's face as she wrapped her arms 'round our son, was only comparable to the smile she bore the day that he took his first breath. She was fair glowin' despite the weariness she must have felt.

Hours later, when Peter opened his eyes and smiled at her, Izzy's joy was complete.

_***WYiMA***_

Peter only stayed awake long enough for his Mam to coax a few sips of water in him afore he lay back and closed his eyes again. Part of me was thankful that he didn't ask no questions 'bout Joseph.

When I lay down for the night soon after, I couldn't shake the feel of bein' ill at ease.

A noise caused me to stir. I lay awake just listenin', 'til I realized I could hear movement comin' from Frederick and Peter's bedroom. Izzy was already climbin' from our bed afore I'd had the chance to sit up.

Frederick, bein' almost as stubborn as his mam, refused the pot, and was tryin' to make his way outside to the privy. After helpin' him, I practically had to carry him back to the room, where I found Izzy frettin' over Peter, who was awake and sittin' up in bed.

When I come through the door, two sets of big brown eyes turned to me in a panic. "Ed," Izzy gasped, "look here, we may need to call on that no-count doctor."

I looked where she was pointin' and seened the bloody discharge that had come from my son's ears while he slept. I made sure to school my expression so as not to frighten him any more than he already was.

"Son, are ya in pain?"

I asked the question, but Peter didn't answer, he just kept starin' at me.

When his Mam said his name, he never turned to look at her. She said it again and again, each time the panic soundin' a little louder in her voice.

"Son, answer your Mam." I telled him quietly, knowin' it weren't no use.

"Pap," he said the word, but it come out soundin' strange.

Izzy placed her hands on either side of his face and turned him to look at her.

"Can ya hear me Peter?" She choked out as her eyes filled with tears.

As soon as he seen his Mam's tears, Peter's lip started to quiver.

"What wrong with Peter?" Frederick asked.

Izzy pulled Peter against her and begun swayin' back and forth. "He cain't hear, Frederick. The fever's done took his hearin'."

_***WYiMA***_

"Well, your boy's deaf. Nothin' to be done about it." The doc said the words I was dreadin' to hear as he packed his tools back in the bag.

"What ya mean there's nothin' to be done?" I asked, some of the desperation I was feelin', soundin' in my words.

"Exactly as I said. You can take him to a specialist, but you'll most likely find that the damage is irreversible." He quirked an eyebrow in a manner that made my fist itch to meet his jaw. "Maybe if you weren't so mule-headed and had let me treat the boy, circumstances would be different now…"

"He'd be dead 'cause ya woulda bled him, like ya did Joseph," Izzy's temper flared as she spoke the words. "If'n my brother-in-law had tossed ya out sooner, mayhap that young'un would still be with us…"

"And maybe he'd be in the state your boy is in, or worse. Sometimes, _not surviving_ is a blessing in disguise." He cast a narrowed eye in the direction of my son, "I believe you will come to understand that soon enough."

I couldn't help but grab the sumbitch by the front of his shirt and pull him with no small amount of force down the hall. Once at the front door, I opened it and tossed him out on the porch. "Get the hell outta my house."

"How dare you?" He muttered whilst straightenin' his clothes.

"Dare? Ya _dare_ say that it would be better if'n I'd lost my boy?" I spat out the words. "Ya _dare_ say that, and don't expect me to toss ya out on your ass? Ya's lucky I ain't bloodied your lip for ya as well."

"There's still the matter of my payment." The doc said in a right surly tone.

"I'll get your money." I went and fetched two dollars from the old china teapot that belonged to Izzy's mother and threw them at the no-count, afore slammin' the door in his face.

I felt Izzy's little hand slip into mine as I stood watchin' from the window 'til the fool and his buggy was out of sight.

"What we gonna do, Ed?"

"We find a specialist, darlin'." I turned to face her, placin' my hand against the side of her face. "If'n there's naught to be done then we bear it, and we get up every mornin' thankin' the Lord for his many mercies."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you're still with me. 
> 
> This first part was written months ago, but I was just recently able to add the rest to it. The emotions are so different for parts 2 and 3, that I found it not only aesthetically pleasing to separate them, but necessary for the flow of the story.
> 
> Parts 2 and 3 promise to be less sad; although it wouldn't be realistic to pretend that life was always easy in those days, and for a child to grow to adulthood was something to be cherished. Not saying that it isn't today, however, I think we take a lot of things for granted that our ancestors did not.
> 
> Love to hear your thoughts.


	79. The Future - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer- Stephenie still owns the usual suspects.  
> I own my original characters and original story.
> 
> Because I love the 'drabble-ish' feel of this story, I wanted to continue that. Therefore, I've split the Future Take into 3 parts. 
> 
> Enjoy!

****

**The Future – Part 2**

**Spring, 1882**

Today marked a year since we'd laid my nephew, Joseph Cullen, to rest.

In many ways, the time that passed seemed longer. So much can happen in a year, good and bad; thankfully the Lord seen fit to spare us more of the bad.

For now.

 _Blest be the tie that binds_  
our hearts in Christian love;  
the fellowship of kindred minds  
is like to that above. 

Izzy's voice never sounded more beautiful than it did as we stood 'round the grave, rememberin' the little angel who warn't never far from our thoughts.

 _Before our Father's throne_  
we pour our ardent prayers;  
our fears, our hopes, our aims are one,  
our comforts and our cares.

 _We share each other's woes,_  
our mutual burdens bear;  
and often for each other flows  
the sympathizing tear. 

I glanced at the faces of family and friends gathered together: Emmett, Rosa and their young'uns; Izzy and ours; Jasper standin' quiet and serious like always with his arm 'round Mary Alice, while she held the hand of their daughter; and lastly, my eyes fell upon Theo and standin' beside him, the gal he was courtin', Martha.

 _When we asunder part,_  
it gives us inward pain;  
but we shall still be joined in heart,  
and hope to meet again.

I felt my brother's arm drape across my shoulders and turned to find him wipin' at his eyes with his handkerchief.

 _This glorious hope revives_  
Our courage by the way;  
While each in expectation lives,  
And longs to see the day.

 _From sorrow, toil, and pain,_  
And sin, we shall be free;  
And perfect love and friendship reign  
Through all eternity.

"Ya got a voice that was heaven sent, Izzy" Rosa give my wife a hug afore wipin' the tears from her own eyes.

"Thank ya Rosa, I wanted to sing my very best for Joseph."

"That ya did, darlin'." Emmett telled her afore sweepin' her into a hug of his own.

"Careful, brother." Obviously Emmett needed a reminder 'bout Izzy's delicate condition.

He grinned at me and give my shoulder a nudge. "I'm bein' careful. Ed, I swear you'd think this here was your first instead of your sixth, the way ya carry on."

Izzy laughed the hardest at what he'd said.

I didn't find no humor in it.

If nothin' else, the last year had taught me to cherish them that I loved most, and that began with Izzy. Along with the cherishin' I'd discovered that my natural tendency to worry 'bout her and the young'uns had increased tenfold.

It was the feelin' of bein' helpless that liked to eat me up inside.

When I learned that Izzy was expectin' again, I reckon I went a little crazy. She'd been patient with me, said she understood; and telled me it was the way of things after a loss.

"When my Mam died, I couldn't bear for my Pap or brothers to be outta my sight. The fear of somethin' happenin' to them, and me not bein' able to stop it was all consumin' for a time." She telled me in a soft, carin' voice, "Alls I can say Ed, is to put your trust in Him that knows your every care. We warn't never meant to be happy every day in this life," she run her fingers through my hair while speakin', "although, if heaven is better than the life I have here with you and our young'uns, it must be glorious indeed."

I pressed my lips to hers. "I cain't imagine nothin' better'n the life I have with you, Izzy. And I hope to earn the right to be with ya in the hereafter."

She grinned afore layin' her head upon my shoulder, "Sweet talker."

After visitin' Joseph's grave, all our friends and family walked the short distance to the field beside the pond for a picnic. It was a right beautiful day and, after we'd eaten our fill, I relaxed beside Izzy and surveyed the scene afore me. It was rare to have a moment like this one, and I was learnin' to appreciate 'em more and more.

My three oldest boys was fishin' in the pond with their cousin, while Peter ran along behind 'em playin' fetch with Young Jack. Sophie and the little gals was off in the meadow, pickin' wildflowers, and I could see Theo and Martha takin' a stroll on the far side of the pond.

It was hard to believe that Sophie and my eldest, Jacob was now fourteen years old.

_Where had the years gone?_

"These young'uns are growin' like weeds; makes me feel old," I said to no one in particular.

"Speak for yourself," Emmett answered. I turned to see him grinnin' from ear to ear.

Lord knows it was good to see him smilin' again. We'd suffered through many months without the sight of it.

I chuckled, not able to help myself, and reached over to rest my hand on Izzy's protrudin' belly. I was rewarded with a kick to my palm, courtesy of our new son or daughter. I laughed outright at the feel of it, and leaned in to kiss my wife, just below her ear.

Izzy warn't normally comfortable with such displays in public, but we was with family, and those that warn't related by blood may as well have been. "I reckon I don't feel all that old." I admitted. Izzy smiled and covered my hand with one of her own.

Just then, I caught sight of my brother, stealin' a kiss from his wife, bringin' a blush rarely seen to her cheeks. Even Jasper seemed in an affectionate mood as he rubbed his hand over Mary Alice's back in a soothin' fashion.

A loud peal of laughter drew my attention, and I turned to see Molly runnin' toward us, all the other little gals followin' close behind. "I picked these for ya, Mam," a bright smile lit up her little face as she handed a bunch of daisies to Izzy.

My wife took the flowers and pulled our daughter onto her lap. "They are beautiful, little girl. I reckon this here's the best gift I ever got."

Molly giggled as her Mam smothered her face with kisses.

The near identical scene was playin' out on either side of where we sat as first little Bella and then Rosa's three gals gifted flowers to their mothers as well.

I seen Izzy smilin' when Mary Alice pulled Bella down to sit beside her, knowin' that there warn't no room on her lap. Rosa did likewise with her little gals.

I sighed and shook my head thinkin' 'bout the fact that for the first time ever, Rosa, Izzy and Mary Alice was all with child at the same time. To be honest, it was both a marvel and a worry for their poor husbands, me included.

Every night I prayed that all three would deliver safely, and silently added the hope that those babes didn't get the notion to enter this world together.

I didn't relish the thought of deliverin' my young'un without help, and that no-count doctor warn't never settin' a foot in my house again.

Izzy tried to assure me over and over that it warn't likely to happen that way, 'specially since Rosa and Mary Alice was closer to their time than she was, but babes was known for comin' at a time of their own choosin', not their parents'.

As soon as Molly seen Sophie and her sisters rise from the blanket their Ma and Pa was sittin' on, she stood up, intendin' to chase after them.

"Hey, where's my kiss," I asked with a pout afore she was able to run off.

My little angel turned to face me and giggled, "I sorry Pap, I forgot," she said sweetly while her fingers toyed with the collar of my shirt.

I placed my hand over my heart, like I'd been wounded. "Molly, how can ya forget your old Pap? I count on them kisses little gal."

Her green eyes grew wide with alarm as she threw her arms 'round my neck and hugged me somethin' fierce. Afore she pulled away, I felt soft lips press against my cheek.

And then, as she always did, my little darlin' grabbed my mangled hand and left a sweet kiss there as well.

"Ya be awright if'n I go now?" She asked with a worried look.

I nodded.

She held one little finger in the air, "I be back soon, I pwomise. If'n ya need more kisses, ya ask Mam while I gone."

I didn't even turn to look at my brother, but I sure enough heard his boomin' laughter.

"I'll do that baby girl."

She give me a smile that liked to melt my heart, and went to join the others.

"So, y'all come to an agreement 'bout Pete's schoolin' yet?" My brother asked, once he'd stopped his laughin'.

Trust Emmett to bring up the subject I had no desire to discuss.

The question of whether or not my son was goin' away to school, was one that Izzy and me was in disagreement over.

In the year since Peter had lost his hearin', we'd seen three different doctors, all with the same result, the damage done by the fever was too great to be undone. Our boy was gonna be deaf for the remainder of his life.

After we'd shed tears and consoled one another, Izzy, with the help of Mary Alice, made inquiries 'bout a school for the deaf in Austin. Trouble was, if Peter was to attend, he'd have to stay there a good portion of the year, and I couldn't bring myself to part with any of my children.

"After he's seen me safely delivered of this babe," Izzy spoke while rubbin' her hand across her belly, "Ed's goin' on the train to that school and he's gonna see for hisself that it's the best thing for Peter."

"Izzy, we been over this," I said as I ran a hand across my brow, "It's too far away. That little feller won't know what to do without us."

"Ed, he was so young when the fever struck that he don't even know his letters." Izzy spoke in a calm voice, tryin' to make me see things her way, "A whole year has passed in which he's learned nothin'. That school can teach him everythin' he'd a learned if'n he'd never lost his hearin'."

"He's too young to go all that way. Cain't we wait a year or two?"

"Ed, ya remember what the letter said. The sooner Peter can start; the better it will be for him."

I hung my head, not wantin' to think on it.

"Ed," I turned to find Emmett lookin' toward where our young'uns was playin', all signs of humor gone from his face. "take a good look at your son."

My eyes found Peter, sittin' in the grass, Young Jack sprawled out beside him.

"Don't tell me ya haven't noticed how he keeps to hisself and won't play with the others. And it ain't on account of him missin' my boy."

I fought against the pain in my chest, knowin' the truth of his words.

"He knows he's different Ed, and your denyin' it, ain't gonna change a thing." Izzy laid her hand on my forearm while Emmett continued. "If'n I was in your place, and that was my Joseph, I'd move heaven and earth to do right by him."

I drew in a shaky breath and swallowed back the lump in my throat. "I've been a very selfish man."

"No, Ed." Izzy argued. "Ya just love with your whole heart. Ain't nothin' wrong with that."

I cleared my throat and give her a hug. "Thank ya for bein' patient with me, sweet girl."

"I should be sayin' the same to you every day," she answered with a playful smile.

I turned to face my brother. "Ya reckon after these babes get here, ya mayhap be willin' to accompany me to Austin so's we can see this school firsthand?"

"I'll be lookin' forward to it." He said as he gimme a slap on the shoulder.

"Easy," I smiled and rubbed at the spot where he'd hit.

"Sorry little brother." The look on his face telled me he warn't sorry in the least.

"As much as I hate to interrupt y'all," the urgent tone in Rosa's voice got everyone's attention, "Emmett, I'm gonna need ya to help me up and then I'm gonna need ya to get me home. This babe don't want to wait another day to meet his Pa."

The fearful expression on my brother's face was almost comical but I didn't dare smile knowin' that, afore long it'd be my turn again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more future take to go and then I'll be asking y'all to be patient as I finish some other stories in order to begin writing the sequel, Edward and Bella's story: "Into My Arms".
> 
> Texas size hugs to all of y'all who've left love in the form of reviews or commented on Facebook, your encouragement means more than you will ever know! -Anne xoxo


	80. The Future - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer- Stephenie still owns the usual suspects.  
> I own my original characters and original story.
> 
> *Note the time jump. This FT takes place seven years after part 2.
> 
> Enjoy!

****

**The Future – Part 3**

**November to December 1889**

_Correspondence sent to-_

_Mister Jacob Black_  
Springfield, Robertson County  
Tennessee

_San Angelo, Texas  
November 1, 1889_

_Dear Jacob,_

_I hope this letter finds you and yours in good health._

_The purpose of my letter is firstly to impart a bit of news. Word reached us over a month ago that my father's only sister, my Aunt Amelia Jennings, had died of the influenza at her home in Virginia. Seeing that Aunt Amelia's husband and only daughter had preceded her in death by many years, she had long ago made arrangements that Emmett and I would be her inheritors._

_Aunt Amelia's solicitor has made arrangements for Emmett and me, along with our families to travel by railway to Virginia, in order to settle the estate. Emmett and I have discussed it, and neither of us, in good conscience, could return to Texas without stopping for a time in Tennessee._

_I will wire you as soon as our business in Virginia is concluded, with the date and hour of our expected arrival._

_Until that time I remain your friend,_

_Edward Cullen_

**December 1889**

When we stepped from the train in Nashville, the sight of my old friend, Jacob Black standin' there to greet us, liked to bring a tear to my eye.

We'd corresponded regularly durin' the more'n twenty years since I'd gone away, but never once in all that time had me or Izzy returned to Tennessee, 'til now.

"Well if ya ain't a sight for sore eyes, Jacob Black!" Izzy exclaimed as she ran to hug him, beatin' me to it. I shifted my son, Charlie to my other hip, so's I could shake hands.

"Izzy, if'n I didn't know for certain that more'n twenty years had passed, I'd swear today was your weddin' day. Ya ain't changed a bit."

"Aw Jake, ya have a talent for tellin' a lie with a straight face," she giggled, "but I thank ya for it."

"Ain't a lie, little lady," he looked over at me, his smile full of mischief, "On the other hand, this sorry so and so looks like he was rode hard and put up wet." He laughed, and I warn't a bit surprised when my brother joined in.

"Thank ya kindly," I answered with a smirk.

"Jacob Black, aside from greyin' at the temples, my husband's no different than he was the day I met him," Izzy turned toward me with a gentle smile, "no that's not right; I reckon he's even more handsome now."

The sincerity in Izzy's eyes left no doubt that she believed the words. I knowed that her perception was obscured by her love for me, but was thankful that she still seen somethin' of the young impetuous feller she married when she cast her eyes in my direction.

As I looked at her beautiful face and contemplated what a fortunate man I truly was, for a moment I allowed my thoughts to travel down a path of wishin' I had Izzy alone so's I could give her a proper kiss.

She musta caught the gleam in my eye 'cause all of a sudden her cheeks turned fiery red. I chuckled as I pulled her against me. "Thank ya, darlin'," I answered, afore kissin' her softly right there in full view of me and Emmett's families and anyone else who cared to watch. It warn't the kiss I wanted to give, but it would have to do for now.

I heared the young'uns let out a collective groan.

Jacob laughed again, "Well, in one thing you two ain't changed a bit."

"And you are the spittin' image of your Pa," I telled him while turnin' back to face him with a smile.

"So I've been told." His expression turned a might somber then.

"How's your Ma?" I asked.

Jacob sighed, "She's gettin' along."

When I got word last winter that Jake's Pa had died, I knowed he took it hard. He'd been as close to his Pa as I'd been to mine.

I nodded my head, knowin' I needed to change the subject. I placed my hand on Jake's shoulder. "I know I telled ya that we could make our own way from Nashville to Springfield, not wantin' to put ya out, but I'm right glad ya didn't listen to me."

His smile returned. "It's good to see ya again, Ed. I was beginnin' to think it warn't never gonna happen."

After Emmett introduced him to Rosa and all the young'uns, his and mine, we loaded the womenfolk, and the younger children into a hired wagon which would take them to the hotel. The distance warn't far, so us menfolk, along with our boys, decided to walk it.

I was right tired of sittin' on that train all day.

"So none of the family come with ya, Jake?" Emmett asked.

"Renie and my boys are runnin' the store. We'll see them tomorrow. My wife's countin' on cookin' for everyone."

"Aw, hell," Emmett blurted out, "Don't she realize we've brung half a General Lee's army with us?" He laughed afore touslin' Peter's hair, "with twice the appetite. These boys could eat ya outta house and home in one sittin'."

They all laughed at that, and I seen Jake marvel at the fact that Peter laughed as well. He give me a questionin' look, "Does Peter know what Emmett was sayin'?"

I smiled and nodded. "He's right good at readin' lips, so long as the person don't speak too quickly. He also knows how to make words with his hands, we all do. Izzy was right insistent 'bout us learnin' that."

_***WYiMA***_

The next mornin' dawned clear and cold. Jake had arranged the hirin' of two wagons for me and Emmett to use durin' the next few days afore returnin' to Nashville and boardin' the train for home.

I swear it took pert near an hour to wrestle the trunks, two wives and thirteen children into place, but once we finally managed it, we got on our way; Emmett's family in one wagon, and mine in the other.

Izzy and me sat up front with our boy Charlie between us. The others; four boys and two gals, were seated in the back. Jake rode alongside on his horse.

We hadn't gone far when my wife turned to face the back, feelin' the need to say somethin' to our older sons. "You boys best better had listened to me and used that privy afore we started, cause your Pa ain't stoppin' in an hour just so's y'all can take a piss," Izzy telled them in a scoldin' tone.

I bit my lip so's not to laugh, but didn't miss the sound of Jacob, Edward and Frederick snickerin'.

"Yes, Mam." They all three answered as one.

I couldn't resist the urge to tease her. "Darlin', now that you're an heiress, mayhap ya shouldn't be sayin' words like 'piss' no more."

Izzy blew out a breath. "I ain't no heiress, Ed. You and Emmett was the ones to inherit that money."

"It's yours too, Izzy. On the day we wed, I made a promise."

"Didn't have nothin' to do with your Aunt Amelia's money," she argued.

"It has to do with everythin' that I have darlin'. Face it, ya own me, body, soul and all my earthly possessions."

She raised one eyebrow and got a wicked gleam in her eye as she leaned in to whisper in my ear. "God's truth, as long as I get say over your body, I reckon I don't care 'bout the earthly possessions."

"Ya would say somethin' like that here, when there ain't nothin' to be done 'bout it," I whispered back and shook my head, "It ain't like I can take ya into the back of the wagon and have my way like I used to."

"I reckon that's 'cause the results of ya, _havin' your way,_ has done filled up the back of the wagon, leavin' little room for anythin' else." She cackled loudly and I give her an amused smile afore leanin' in close to kiss her lips.

The boys must not have been payin' attention, but our little Ruby warn't one to ever miss a trick. "They's at it again, Molly," I heared her say through her giggles, causin' me and her Mam to laugh as well.

It was almost sundown when we reached the Springfield city limits. Izzy picked up Charlie, settin' him on her lap afore scootin' closer and restin' her head on my shoulder. "Oh Ed, I believe I'm gonna cry. All them memories…"

I nodded afore reachin' my arm 'round her shoulders. "I know, darlin'."

"Last time I was here, I was scared to death and runnin' for my life." She spoke in a quiet voice, and I understood why. Charlie, bein' only three warn't a concern, but Izzy had never telled the children 'bout the ordeal she'd lived through on account of James Forrest and it warn't the time to do so now. "I don't regret how poorly I was treated though, 'cause it led me to you."

I felt my throat tighten, but didn't have the words to answer, so I just wrapped my arm tighter 'round her shoulders.

Jake come up alongside on his horse then and started pointin' out the changes since we'd left. "There's the new courthouse I was tellin' ya 'bout."

"I never imagined anythin' so big in Springfield," Izzy marveled.

The town had grown, that was for sure, but not near as much as San Angelo had in the twenty years since we'd been there, and Jasper was a very wealthy man on account of it.

"I see the tavern's still here," Izzy said with a scowl as we passed the red brick buildin' on the corner.

Jake nodded.

As I pulled the wagon in front of Jake's store, which was a good sight larger than it had been twenty years afore, I was suddenly overwhelmed with memories from the day I left.

"This is where it all started," Izzy whisered. "Ya had the wagon hitched in this very spot when I climbed up in it to hide."

I give her a smile. "Luckiest day of my life, darlin'."

She returned the smile afore we were distracted by Renie and all Jake's young'uns pourin' forth from the store to greet us.

There was a William and a Jake just 'bout the ages of mine and Emmett's older boys, and Jake's Eddie was a year older than Peter. Jake and Renie's daughter, Ginnie was the same age as my Ruby.

The noise from all the chatterin' between the womenfolk and the young'uns lasted right straight through the evenin' meal.

_***WYiMA***_

"What y'all got planned for tomorrow?" Jake asked afore takin' a long draught of his beer.

Once supper was over and we'd gotten our families settled into rooms at the inn, Jake talked me and Emmett into havin' a drink at the tavern. Afore I could say yay or nay, all our sons who was over the age of sixteen was followin' us up the street.

"After church, Izzy wants to take the young'uns to see where she growed up." I answered.

"Rosa wants to take our brood to visit her Uncle. Then I reckon we'll go by our old home," he hesitated and give me a mournful look, "and the cemetery."

It would be the first time visitin' Pa's grave for him, and I reckoned it would feel like a fresh wound.

"We gotta start for home day after tomorrow, our girl Sophie's expectin' and her Ma like to skin me alive if we ain't back home in time for the birth." Emmett give a nervous chuckle. I knowed he was worried 'bout his daughter, even though she was a grown up married woman.

Sophie was the only one of the young'uns not able to make the trip with us.

"The feller she married to a good sort?" Jake asked.

"He'd best be, or he'd most likely have a bullet hole or several in him by now." Emmett answered with narrowed eyes.

I laughed. "John's a good man. Emmett's his boss over at Whitlock's farm. And ya know that boy must love Sophie to suffer what her Pa, brother, cousins and favorite uncle," I flashed Jake a smile while the boys laughed, "put him through when he come courtin'."

Emmett took another drink as he seemed to be ponderin' somethin'. "I been thinkin' 'bout usin' part of that inheritance to purchase John and Sophie some land of their own. He's a hard worker, deserves a hand up."

I nodded. "We's both gonna owe him after this trip." I turned back toward Jake, "He's been seein' to our livestock while we been away."

Jake nodded.

"Ed and Emmett Cullen as I live and breathe, and lookin' as handsome as ever," sounded a familiar feminine voice from behind me. I turned to find Miss Sally standin' there smilin' like she'd been handed a precious gift. I stood to greet her and removed my hat, she was a lady after all, and I considered myself to be a gentleman, most of the time at least. All the others followed my lead.

"Please, have a seat, I didn't mean to disturb y'all."

Miss Sally looked a might older, but not quite twenty years' worth. She had to be sixty if'n she was a day, but was what my Pa woulda referred to as 'well preserved'. Even so, I couldn't imagine that she was still entertainin' gentlemen callers.

I frowned at Jake. He coulda at least warned me that Miss Sally was still in town.

"Howdy do, Miss Sally." I said afore takin' my seat again.

"I do right well for myself. I guess Jake didn't tell ya that I'm Missus Wise now. Been married these last fifteen years." Her gaze strayed from me and went to rest on my two eldest boys, makin' me feel right uncomfortable. "These two must be yours, Ed, they look just like ya."

"Yes, Mam. This here's my oldest, Jacob and my second son, Edward." My boys made me proud by bowin' their heads politely. "And this one here's my third boy, Frederick."

Frederick favored his Mam, so's Miss Sally wouldn't a known he was mine without the tellin'.

Her eyes opened wide. "How many children do ya have, Ed?"

"Izzy and me have been blessed with seven young'uns, I'm pleased to say."

"So the rumor was true?" She asked, her smile fallin' a little.

"What rumor would that be Mam?"

"The talk that ya married that little slip of a girl, Izzy Swan, who stowed away in your wagon. Lila, who used to work for me was engaged to that little gal's uncle. I heard he lost his niece in a poker game and she got revenge by gettin' him killed…."

That was the moment I realized I needed to stop Miss Sally's, er Missus Wise's idle chatter. By the looks on my boys' faces, I already had a lot of explainin' to do. I held up my hand. "Mam, as much as it goes against my nature to speak ill of the dead, my Izzy's uncle was 'bout to sell her in marriage to the lowest, meanest and vilest creature that I ever come across afore or since. Them fellers followed us, and aimed to force Izzy to return with them. In the end, her uncle done the right thing and helped her escape, payin' for it with his life. I'd appreciate it if'n ya didn't say no more in front of my children 'bout a time their Mam would sooner forget."

I watched as Miss Sally's face grew a might red from embarrassment. "I beg pardon, Ed. I didn't mean any harm."

I nodded once.

"Well, I'll let you fellers get back to enjoyin' your evenin'."

As soon as Miss Sally was gone from sight, the questions began. So, for the next little while, I imparted to my sons and everyone else at the table, the story of me and Izzy's journey from Tennessee, endin' it at the moment James Forrest lay dead on the floor of that freight car.

It was the first time I'd given the full account since tellin' the sheriff in Shreveport all them years ago.

When I was through, I ordered a round of beers, and waited for some kind of reaction from my boys.

"I reckon we won't let onto Mam that we know 'bout all this." Edward was the first one to speak.

"That would be for the best. She never wanted her children to be troubled by it." I answered.

"I'm glad ya killed him and saved our Mam," Frederick said, his voice barely above a whisper. "Ya always telled us it warn't right to kill, but I'm glad ya done it Pap."

Everyone at the table nodded in silent agreement.

"This is the last I'll speak on it, but I want y'all to know that I regard the killin' of that varmint as the single most important thing I ever done in my life. For in killin' him, I saved your Mam and myself, without which none of you children would be here. I cain't never regret it, even if I was so inclined."

_***WYiMA***_

We lingered in Tennessee two days longer than Emmett's family. We spent that time visitin' places Izzy and me remembered from our childhood, includin' the homes where we was born and raised.

"The house looked smaller than I remembered, but that warn't the part that pulled on my heartstrings." Izzy said as we packed for our return journey. "Despite the fact that I spent sixteen years of my life on that farm, there ain't a piece of me that was left behind. I miss my parents, always will, but the life I had with them will live on in memory only. Everythin' that means the most to me belongs in Texas, and that's as it should be."

"I couldn't a said it better myself, darlin'." I telled her afore pullin' her into my arms.

_***WYiMA***_

I touched my hand to the stone marker, much as I'd done all them years afore. "Never thought I'd come back here again." The words come out in a whisper. "Wonder what Ma and Pa would make of me, if they could see me now?"

"Oh, Ed." Izzy spoke from beside me. "They'd be mighty proud, just the same as we are of our children. You and Emmett are fine men, devoted husbands, and I don't think any child could ask for more lovin' fathers."

"Pap, what's them words?" Ruby pointed her little finger at the writin' on the stone.

"That's my Pa's name, Alexander Carlisle Cullen, and below that is written my Ma's, Esmeralda."

Ruby smiled with delight, "Them's the names of our cousins!"

"They surely are little darlin'." I reached down to pick her up. 'Course Charlie got a might jealous then and started pullin' on the leg of my trousers wantin' to be held as well. He was content once he was settled on his Mam's hip.

I looked across the cemetery to where the sun had warmed the ground enough to melt the frost. "I reckon we'd best be goin'. It's a long trek to Nashville." I set Ruby down so's she could follow the others to the wagon, and turned back toward the grave one last time. "Ya take care of one another, and don't worry yourselves 'bout me. As ya can see, I been blessed far more than I deserve."

I felt Izzy close beside me, and turned to find her lookin' at me with watery eyes. I give her a sad smile and reached for Charlie, "Ya ready to go home Missus Cullen?"

"I am, Mister Cullen." She whispered.

Hand in hand, we walked away, my heart heavy with the memory of losin' my folks. When I reached the wagon, I couldn't help but smile at the expectant faces of my young'uns.

It was then I knowed that my parents would always be with me. My Pa was there every day in Jacob's smile and Edward's laugh; in the look on Peter's face when he was concentratin' hard on somethin'. My Ma was there in Ruby's piercin' green eyes. Not to mention the fact that three of my young'uns had been blessed with a mop of unruly reddish brown hair that my Ma had happily passed on to me.

I was certain that Ma and Pa was lookin' down on my family from heaven, and the Lord had sent these reminders to keep them alive in my memory. The thought of it brought a smile to my face as I helped Izzy and Charlie into the wagon.

For the second time in my life, I was leavin' Robertson County behind, with no plans of returnin'. This time it warn't loneliness or desperation drivin' me on, it was the love of my family and the home I'd built with Izzy callin' to me, the pull so strong I doubt I'd have the strength to fight it, even if I'd wanted to….

Izzy, her voice soundin' as lovely as ever, sang us outta Robertson County.

_How dear to my heart are the scenes of my childhood  
When fond recollection presents them to view_

_The orchard, the meadow, the deep tangled wildwood,  
And ev'ry loved spot which my infancy knew_

_The wide spreading pond, and the mill that stood by it,  
The bridge and the rock where the cataract fell;_

_The cot of my father, the dairy house nigh it,  
And e'en the rude bucket that hung in the well._

_The old oaken bucket, the iron bound bucket,  
The moss covered bucket that hung in the well…_

_******* The End ******* _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate to say goodbye to Izzy and Ed, however we'll see them again in the sequel, "Into My Arms". Be sure to put me on 'alert' so you won't miss when it begins to post. It will be some time because I want to finish writing a couple other stories before starting a new one.
> 
> I purposely left out any discussion of 'sweethearts' for the older boys because that, for the most part, will be the subject matter of the sequel.
> 
> "The Old Oaken Bucket" was originally a poem which was set to music in the early 1800s. In the song a 'cataract' is another term for a waterfall.
> 
> Thank you all so much for taking this journey with me, there were a few scary moments along the way, but I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed telling this story.
> 
> Until next time, take care. We'll meet again soon, God willin' and the creek don't rise. 
> 
> As always, I love to hear your thoughts... Anne
> 
> **Because I know some of you are more than curious, here's a list of all the young'uns (and their ages) as of December 1889 (in future take part 2, all 3 women were expecting at the same time. Rosa gave birth to twins, Anna and Emmett; Izzy had Ruby; and Alice had little Andrew):
> 
> Jasper & Alice: Isabella Rose (13) and Andrew Brandon (7)
> 
> Emmett & Rosa: Sophie Marie (21), Alexander Carlisle (19), Elena Margarita (16), Esmeralda Rose (14), Joseph (died in 1881), twins Anna and Emmett (7), Robert (4).
> 
> Ed & Izzy: Jacob Carlisle (21), Edward Anthony (19), Frederick Henry (17), Peter Theodore (14), Molly Belle (11), Ruby Lee (7), Charles Alfred (3)…still to come Nell Swan Cullen (born before the beginning of the sequel).


End file.
